Between the lines
by fraukey
Summary: Compilation of one shots/missing scenes from season 10; will be one shot per episode from last season as a countdown to season 11!
1. 10x01-10x02

[10x01/10x02]

Jo was walking through the deserted hallways. She and her fellow interns had just returned from their salvaging trip on the mountainside. Her limbs felt heavy as lead, she could feel the dirt and excoriations everywhere. Her eyes were burning, from the dust, from the salty winds, from the bright rescue lights, from trying to make out people buried in the dirt, from exhaustion. She felt like she had been up for what… days and days. What had happened hours ago seemed like weeks. She turned on the steaming hot water in one of the shower cubicles of the interns' locker rooms and got undressed. The first drop of clean water that hit her body felt like relief washing over her. It had only been 3 nights ago that she had still been seeing Jason. That they had fought, that it had escalated. It had only been 3 nights since she had run into Alex's arms for safety and shelter. 3 nights since they had made up. _How could she have been so stupid?_ Pushing the one person away that was there for her all along. The one person that actually got her. The one person that was there for her, unconditionally it seemed. The storm, hundreds of injured people flooding their E.R., Heather dying. Dr. Webber hanging on to dear life. Alex telling her he loved her. His safe arms around her, holding her tight. His lips on hers. Jo's heart threatened to burst with emotions. People running around helplessly, frightened, homeless, injured – thousands of people hurt by a nature caused catastrophe. Stephanie rocking her hysterical cheerleading routine. People mourning their friends, their families. Shane ceasing to talk, spiraling down in some kind of stupor, not letting anyone in.

BANG- "Jo, are you gonna be done at some point?" Leah's voice ripped through Jo's eardrums like a knife.

"Geez, get a grip," Jo replied softly, finding herself sitting on the shower floor, still sprinkling herself with hot water, trying not to doze off, her mind full with that one long day that wouldn't end. Getting up and quickly spreading soap over her body and hair, she got a grip on herself. She needed to find Alex. All she needed to hear right now were his soothing words, was his strong, confident voice. All she needed to feel were his arms wrapped around her. She needed him. With a sigh she got out of the shower, making room for a nearly sleeping, still super annoying Leah who was on a rant about working hours in this hospital. Oh shut up, will you? Jo felt like everything she did and everything around her happened in slow motion. She got clean clothes to wear out of her locker and left the room to find Alex. Seeing he wasn't in any of the nurses' stations, the makeshift E.R. or the NICU, without thinking much about the consequences she stopped by Dr. Grey's room, which was dark. Again. Halfway turning around, she heard Grey's voice, stopping, not knowing if she was actually talking to her.

"What's up, Wilson?" her superior's voice came out of the dark.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Grey, I didn't mean to wake you. Again," Jo halfheartedly said, "I was…"

"Looking for Alex?" Another voice joined the conversation. Jo scrunched up her face. The lights went on and she spotted Dr. Yang sitting besides Dr. Grey's bed.

"I thought I saw you leave hours ago?" Jo asked without thinking.

"Well, I saw you leave hours ago in an ambulance as well," Yang responded lazily. "How did that go?"

"Uh, well, it was fine. There's still a lot of people out there. We couldn't do much, though, we're no fire fighters. Leah and I came back with a family with newborns, trying to get them aided. Steph and Shane are still out there. As far as I know," Jo slowly recalled, trying for her eyes to not close.

"Well, you should go get some sleep, hairball," Yang ordered, having followed Jo's story very closely. "We all had a rough couple of nights." Dr. Grey shot a questioning look around to her friend who ignored her blissfully. Jo was just going to leave the doorstep she was still hovering on, when she caught another glimpse of Dr. Yang's words. "Alex is asleep in the on-call room on 3, you know," she said with a wide grin, ignoring Grey's raised eyebrows. Jo tried as hard as she could to give her superior a death glare before slowly turning around, heading to where she expected her boyfriend to be. Boyfriend. This was too much. She hadn't even taken a step back to digest what had happened between her and Alex before. She had been so mad at him. So mad… for…. for… being the most wonderful support she has ever had in her life… She had been mad at the world for her stupid ass boyfriend Jason who she had judged oh so wrong and who she hadn't even liked that much for that matter. Of course he had attracted her but then… he wasn't all that interesting. He didn't excite her. He didn't make her laugh. Not like Alex did. She should have known all along. She should have for once listened to what her guts told her, every freaking time she was dealing with Alex. She never felt like he was a brother to her. She had never believed it was gross to think about them doing it. She had always liked him and felt attracted to him. Except for she hadn't. She hadn't realized it because in true Jo fashion, she had ignored the feelings so diligently, that she couldn't make them out for herself until they were thrown back in her face. Until he was there for her when she needed him. Until that freaking tree came trashing down Alex's living room. Tree! What else had there been that night? Of course she was in love with Alex. How had she not seen that before? She chuckled quietly about her own stupidity. Slowly and quietly, Jo opened the door to the on-call room. The dim light from the hallway shone in through the small gap of the open door, letting her spot Alex's sleeping shape on the bottom bunk of the room. Somebody else was sleeping on the top bunk. She hesitated shortly on the doorstep, observing her boyfriend's rising and falling chest. It calmed her to watch him sleep. She should get into bed with him and just sleep it out. No. She was an intern. She was in love with an attending. She couldn't just climb into an on-call room bed with him and stay there. This was not something she would do. Could do. She hesitated some more. Why shouldn't she? It was her Alex, not some attending. Okay, he was, but he was her attending, right? He was all hers. Oh, whatever, Jo, just do something. Don't make a fool of yourself. Deciding to leave him for that night, she stepped out of the room and closed the door gently. Still not knowing what to do with herself, she carried herself back to the locker room.

"There you are," Stephanie exclaimed, her voice too loud for Jo's tired mind. "What's up with you? Where did you wander off to?"

"Oh, nowhere really," Jo lay down on one of the benches, trying to get some sleep. "I'm just so exhausted."

"Yeah, aren't we all," Stephanie responded, trying to get a clean shirt over her face while not trying to fall asleep. Minutes passed, the locker room was completely quiet except for the one or other rustle caused by Steph.

"So," the just mentioned intern started, startling Jo awake again. "I saw Jason in the ICU this morning," Stephanie continued. Jo just lay there on the bench, arms resting on her forehead, staring at the ceiling. What was she supposed to say? He had done that to himself. Well, she had. But he had provoked her. Ugh.

"Yeah, I figured," Jo just responded quietly, not moving from her place.

"You figured I saw him or you figured he must have been brought in?" Stephanie asked slowly.

"I figured you must have seen him by now," Jo answered, still not looking at her flabbergasted intern friend.

"So, are you gonna tell me what's up with that? And while you're at it, maybe explain your face, too?" Stephanie was getting agitated, Jo could feel her fidgeting.

"I'm tired, Steph, I really, really don't wanna talk about it," she tried.

"Really? You think that is something that just cannot be talked about?" Jo nodded. "Well, you are wrong. Spit."

Jo sighed in defeat. "We got in a fight," she started. "It got really bad," pointing at her still sore bruising which- before that conversation- had long been forgotten. "It escalated," Jo tried to explain but she was exhausted and couldn't think anymore. Also, she was tired of explaining herself.

"What did you guys fight about?"

"Um… Alex mostly. I mean, not really. Mostly about me lying about how I grew up, you know," Jo was hoping she didn't have to say much more.

"Why Alex?" Stephanie pressed on. Jo rolled her eyes at her.

"Because I had told Alex about my childhood before, whereas I hadn't exactly told Jason," she sighed heavily.

"Why?" Stephanie exclaimed, not really thinking about the privacy of her friend. Jo looked at her in disbelief.

"Because! Alex has been my best friend for a long time. We talk about things." A sign of frustration creeped up in her voice. "I thought you'd understand," Jo finished.

"I do, I just wanna follow up. If I may remind you, compared to Mr. Alex, you don't tell me anything anymore," she tried to pout.

"Oh, stop it," Jo exclaimed, pretty worn out already from that conversation.

"So, is that why you've been talking to all of them? The attendings? Yang and Grey and Karev?"

"Um, yeah. I mean I obviously talked to Alex and um… they thought he nearly killed Jason."

"Why would he kill Jason?"

Jo looked up at Stephanie expectantly. She wouldn't have to mouth that out loud as well, would she? The other girl looked at her uncomprehendingly until finally her light bulb flickered.

"What? Oh no, he didn't? I mean, what? Is he in love with you? Is that why you guys have been at each other's throats? Because he's in love with you and jealous of Jason? OH MY GOD! Are you freaking serious? Well, way to go, Dr. Karev" she cheered, roaring with laughter, Jo all the while watching her friend with raised eyebrows. Calming down from her short high, Stephanie added, "What are you going to do about it?"

"What do you mean?" Jo asked, uncertain about what Stephanie was on about at the moment.

"I mean, what are you going to do about Karev?"

"Well, I already did," Jo said, sounding unconcerned.

"What do you mean, you already did? You took care of it?"

"Yes. I took care of it."

"God, Jo, English, please? Karev's in love with you and you act like you don't mind in the least. I mean… wait, what?" Stephanie's eyes were about to wobble out of her sockets, and she had stopped taking in breaths. Jo smiled at her friend and shook her head. "You don't mind him being in love with you?" Stephanie asked again, not believing the news she was hearing. Jo shook her head again. "Which means…. you are…," Stephanie looked up at the now standing Jo. "…in love with Karev?" Jo reluctantly nodded, turning away to hide her blush.

"But you had just been with Jason? I don't get it… I mean, what happened with you guys?"

"I don't know, he just… wasn't Alex," Jo whispered. "Not that I had realized that while I was still seeing him," she added quickly.

"So, what, are you guys… together now?"

"Yeah, we kinda are."

"Wow," Stephanie gulped. "What a night." Jo just nodded. What a night.

The two girls stayed silent for a while, just trying to digest what all they had talked about, all they had seen that day. After a while, Leah came into the locker room and quietly sat down besides them.

"We need to find something to occupy ourselves with," she stated without any emotion. She didn't actually refer that statement to anything much, however, the others knew exactly what she was talking about.

"Sleep?" Jo tried to distract from their obviously common mindsets. Leah winced.

"I tried that. Lying in the top bunk in one of the on-call rooms. That Dr. Taylor's snores function like a jackhammer, I swear. Not only the noise kept me awake but the whole bunk was rattling rhythmically with his terrifying sleep sounds," she concluded exasperatedly. The other two shared a friendly chuckle. "He should get himself looked at, seriously," she added.

"You know there is something we have all been trying to ignore that would occupy us pretty well," the incoming, completely mud stained Shane commented, easily joining the conversation for the first time in what had to have been hours.

"What's that?" Jo asked, surprised about the unannounced visit.

"Intern exams," Stephanie answered all of a sudden, putting her head down on her arms in playful sorrow.

"Aah, how could I have so blissfully forgotten about them?" Jo commented ruefully, regretting asking about the matter.

"We should be study buddies," Leah suggested seemingly motivated. "We could, you know, quiz each other, diagnose each other, fake being extra bitchy patients and practice bedside manners and stuff."

"You wouldn't need to fake the last bit," Stephanie remarked, earning a blow to her shoulder from Leah.

"What do you guys think?"

"I'm in," both Shane and Jo answered synchronically.

"Yeah, probably the best idea you've had in a while, Ms. Leah," Stephanie admitted.

"Well, where should we set up headquarters? I mean, I would say at my place but you know… with Heather gone…" she wandered back over to the topic they had been trying to avoid.

"Well, I'm a damn slob, so, no study hall at my place," Stephanie exclaimed quickly before everyone got stuck on the topic again.

"My place is too small for all of you guys. And also, it has only been introduced to slightly classier ladies, it wouldn't be comfortable with you settling there," Shane tried with a half-hearted grin. This got him a blow on the side from Leah and the threat of another one from Stephanie. "What?" he chuckled, raising his arms in defeat. They all came around to looking expectantly at Jo.

"Well, I don't have an apartment to offer at all," she exclaimed, earning surprised looks from Shane and Leah. Before they could get into this, she added, "how about we just go look for a quiet place here. I mean, Alex has mentioned the tunnels before… that's where 'all the interns hang out' apparently," she trailed off.

"Nah," Shane responded. "That's where Melvin and his guys hang out," he informed them, getting disdainful looks from the others. "Let's not mix with them. That never turns out well. Also, we need to beat them at our exams!" Shane got his competitive look on, one they haven't seen since the whole storm debacle and Heather's death rolled on to them. They chuckled.

"Well, how about we all go look for a private spot somewhere here in the hospital where we can go anytime when we have a few minutes to spare and until then, we just… do anywhere else. I mean you know, supply closets and the cafeteria." They all agreed on the plan and went their separate ways for that night.

After a good night's rest and too much time on her hands due to the chief's still lasting prescription of downtime for them after Heather's death, Jo had found the perfect spot to hang out and study for their exams. One of the patients' rooms way back on the peds ward that never got used because devices were outdated and the room was basically not fully accessible was their new hiding spot. Jo was sitting in the visitor's chair, while Stephanie was proudly presenting a case she had just cracked theoretically, lying on one of the kids' beds. She couldn't believe she still hadn't been able to get some alone time with Alex since the storm, other than the few moments of comfort he had given her after Heather's untimely death. They hadn't even met in passing while she was looking for a study spot – ON THE PEDS FLOOR. She could feel that she was getting impatient about their still brand new relationship. She just wanted to see him. Talk to him. Just for a minute, feel like this had not all been a dream. She had even spent her night all alone at his house. Well, no surprise there, since she had seen him sleep it off in that on-call room that she hadn't wanted to enter. Just don't panic. You'll both find the time to be with each other. Remember, he told you he loved you. Sighing dramatically she tried to listen to Steph's next question.

Hours later, Alex was just getting out of a patient's room after diagnosing him with severe pneumonia after an asthmatic attack which made the boy's parents panic and putting him on a bunch of meds and strict bed rest, he sat down at the nurses' station, putting his head in his hands. The sleep he got last night wasn't as satisfactory as he had wished for. His body had hurt of exhaustion and he was longing for Jo to come be with him after all those frantic E.R. happenings. After hours of tossing and turning in the uncomfortable on-call bed, he was called in again on an emergency surgery of one of the twin babies rescued out of the mudslide the day before. All he wanted to do was go home and sleep it off, preferably with Jo by his side. But he still needed to stay for another surgery and evening rounds. A soft pat on his back made Alex look up, hoping It would be Jo's hand.

"How nice it is to see you, too," Arizona hurtfully exclaimed at the look of Alex's disappointed face, pretending to be cheerful. "Seems like everybody is hating on me, now that I'm a public cheater," she wallowed in self-pity.

"Oh, shut up," Alex snapped irritated by his friend's childish behavior. "Nobody hates you. We all got our own problems."

Arizona looked at him wide-eyed, not expecting the refreshing honesty from him. "Walk with me?" she asked him, trying to keep the conversation going while thinking about her most urgent next patient. Alex got up, readying himself for getting to his surgery on time.

"You know, I was thinking we could go to couple's therapy," Arizona shared with Alex.

"M-hm," Alex acknowledged the thought.

"Well, what do you think?"

"I have no idea," Alex responded dismissively, still pondering about Jo and his upcoming surgery.

"Please, tell me what you think about that? I mean, you and Stevens obviously had problems, right? Did you ever go to couple's therapy?" Alex shot his colleague a deadly glare. "I'm sorry, I mean, I just… I don't know what else to do," Arizona stopped, tears pricking her eyes, making patients and parents attentive to their conversation. Alex sighed, taking her arm and pulling her in one of the unused patients' rooms at the end of the peds ward. Arizona sniffed noisily, letting herself get pulled away from the public.

"Look, I don't know what your deal is, I have no idea about couple's therapy, frankly, I don't care about couple's therapy. If you believe it to be a good idea, go talk to Callie about it since I am not the one you cheated on. But do me a favor and get a grip on yourself. You can't be running around the peds ward crying, remember, the makers of tiny humans will all believe it's because of their child," Alex tried to quickly and quietly sort out Arizona's troubles. His remarks only made her sob more. "Look," he gave Arizona's arm a squeeze. "Marriage is hard. Take it from a guy who didn't succeed at it. You go make it work, I know you guys can. Right now, Callie is crazy mad at you for messing up and terribly hurt because she trusted in your marriage, in you. But you will work on it and you guys will figure it out. Alright?" Arizona nodded. Being totally engrossed in their brief exchange, none of the two realized, they had walked in on the interns' study party. Shane cleared his throat politely to make them aware of their presence, even though it was too late to keep Arizona's privacy intact.

Alex and Arizona both turned on their heels quickly, facing the interns by surprise. "Oh," Arizona mouthed quite dumbfounded by the situation.

"We are so, so sorry for overhearing what you people talked about," Leah started to explain, trying to ignore Stephanie's elbow in her ribs. Arizona smiled, a little embarrassed by the whole situation, all the interns looking at her with wide eyes, and excused herself quickly.

"Meet me in the cafeteria after your surgery," she hastily told Alex before she swooped out the door. "I really can't get my butt in there all by myself," she half sobbed, half chuckled. Alex chuckled and closed the door behind her.

"What the hell are you guys doing in here?" he turned back to the interns, basically asking his girlfriend the question.

"We, uh, we are trying to study for our exams, which will be in a couple of weeks," Jo returned lamely, not explaining why they were occupying that exact room. Alex nodded slowly, questioningly.

"And you are in here because….?"

"Dr. Karev, we really tried finding another study spot, it's just, Dr. Perkins and his guys are occupying the tunnels and our private places are not suitable for so many people and everything else really is too public to be studying diligently," Shane rambled on in true Shane fashion, sucking up big time to the boss, trying to sound as thick as possible – at least that's what Jo thought. She rolled her eyes at this. Alex scrunched up his face and chuckled about how Ross talked to him that idiotically.

"Why don't you guys just go back to my house?" Alex returned to serious, looking at Jo, taking her by surprise.

"You wouldn't mind?" she asked unbelievingly.

"Nah, I'm in and out of surgery anyways, and the aftermath of the storm is nowhere near over. You'll score way better outcomes studying there than listening to the babies cry all day long on the peds ward. Plus there's food and beds. Or couches at least."

"What about the tree?"

Alex chuckled. "I had it removed. It's been 3 days, Jo, you really think I'm that irresponsible?" She smiled at him. The other interns were struck with awe. Did that jerk of an attending just offer them his house for studying? And what about all those looks going on between Jo and him? Shane and Leah looked at each other quizzically. Stephanie smiled knowingly.

"Alright then, I really need to go scrub for my surgery," he said halfway out the door. "Don't burn the house down while you're at it," he winked at his girlfriend. Jo quickly gave him one of her best smiles and mouthed a "thank you" towards her almost out the door boyfriend. He was already gone a few moments, when she noticed all her friends stare at her penetratingly. She wiped off her smile quickly and busied herself gathering all their books and cards.

"What?" she snapped.

"Are you sleeping with Karev?" Leah shouted out.

"No!" Jo responded quickly, already feeling a big blush coming down around her neck and cheeks. Shane and Leah began to laugh hysterically.

"Of course she is," Stephanie joined the party.

"Thank you for your support," Jo whispered pissed. "It's not like that," Jo said a little louder.

"Oh he is so gonna dump you, once there are new interns coming in… wait, about 2 weeks," Leah dramatically acted as if looking up a calendar. Jo got up.

"As I said, it's not like that." Leah looked at her disbelievingly, and then over to Stephanie who shrugged.

"So, you are in loooove?" she teased.

"As a matter of fact, yes, I am in love with Alex, I am sorry to tell you that this has nothing to do with sleeping around in the hospital or with my boss or new interns or whatever," Jo exclaimed a little too loud. She was agitated. She tried to calm herself down internally. Why did she get so irritated by her friends' teasing? She knew what this was all about… Maybe she just really needed to talk to Alex. She needed this to be true and established and… she just needed him. Realizing she had shut all of the others up by her exclamation and the room was filled with silence, she relaxed and said with fake impatience lacing her voice, "are you coming or what?"

Much later that night, Alex made his way home after a long and eventually successful surgery. Lights were still on in the living room, indicating the interns were still up. He unlocked the front door, hearing cheerful screams and playful teasing about wrongly diagnosed patients. He went inside, putting his stuff down, making the group look up at him from a makeshift study dorm as it looked like.

"Hey," Jo greeted him first with a gorgeous smile only she could master as beautifully.

"Hey," he smiled back. "Don't let me interfere your half hearted attempts of curing patients," he winked and made his way to the kitchen, where he took out a carton of milk from the fridge, emptying it. Jo had walked in behind him, standing next to the kitchen island, seemingly searching for words.

"How was your surgery?" she got out at last. He put the carton back in the fridge and stayed in his spot.

"Fine," he said. "I'm exhausted." She smiled at him again.

"You look it," she added. They both seemed a little embarrassed by their awkward exchange, knowing that the other interns were trying to listen in on them from the adjoining living room. "So, are you really fine with us studying here?" Jo said, trying to bridge the silence.

"Jo," Alex sighed heavily, moving towards the laundry room, her following behind. "I offered. Don't make me take it back, going on and on about it," he grinned slightly.

"Okay. I just wanted to check. I mean, we can find another spot, I'm sure, if it bothers you," Jo trailed off, stepping inside the dusty and dark laundry room, leaning on the washer with one hip while watching Alex gather up his washed and dried laundry.

"It doesn't bother me, now hush before I change my mind." This was easy. Well, it had always been easy with them. It was just, they hadn't really talked about what this was. About anything much, for that matter. They hadn't talked, or kissed or anything else. They hadn't seen each other, really, since… well, since they made their initial moves. Was she into him as well? Of course, she had to be, right? She had kissed him back. And she seemingly wanted to jump into bed with him right after. And she sought him up for comfort when her friend died. Yeah, she had to be into him as well.

"So, did you hire someone to clean up the living room?" Jo interrupted his mind monologue.

"Yeah," he said, picking up the last of his clean clothes. "Doesn't look like I did it, does it?" They chuckled.

"There's pizza if you want," Jo offered, not wanting the conversation to cease yet, however, seeing him head back into the kitchen, almost passing her already.

"Thanks. I had dinner with Robbins, though," he said.

"Oh, yeah, that," she said. He seemed like he didn't wanna be near her, right? He would have kissed her or looked at her for that matter, right? Jo was trying to fight her doubts down.

"How is she?" Alex looked up at her, distracted by how beautiful she looked, casually leaning against the washer.

"Um," he coughed out, "she'll be fine. I mean, they'll be fine. They'll figure it out." He stated, not so much interested in talking other couples with his girlfriend, but anxious to get their own relationship going. He walked back to the kitchen, passing her on his way, smelling her sweet scent. Stay focused; there are interns in your house. Not only your intern. Oh, what the hell, why would they care, right? He put his laundry on the kitchen table, spinning on his heel to go back to his girlfriend, who looked at him wide eyed.

"What?" she asked innocently, not getting the drift. He chuckled mildly about his dumb little girlfriend. He swooped down the couple of steps into the laundry room again, brought her close and kissed her, softly. Jo was taken aback by this sudden show of affection but reciprocated the kiss. It was sweet, longing, but not too deep. She could feel his muscled torso, his arms around her, smell his unmistakable scent, feel his soft lips on hers. She moaned quietly into his mouth. They parted reluctantly, their faces only inches apart, resting their foreheads together, his arms encircling her waist, her arms resting on his chest.

"I'll be sleeping soon," Alex whispered softly, trying to hide a small yawn. Jo smiled and nodded, looking up at his dreamy eyes.

"We'll be up another while," she whispered back. She traced one more circle with her thumbs on his chest before taking his face into her hands. "Thanks for being so supportive," she said. He smiled, pulling her close one more time and matching her perfect lips to his. It was only a short peck, but it was sweet. He let go of her, turned around, picked up his clothes and left the kitchen towards the stairs. "Good night," Jo called after him, still put in trance by their short encounter. She had put her right hand on her mouth to savor their kiss for a second longer, before pulling her mind back to reality and joining the others back in the living room.

The next few days would pass irritatingly slow. Jo and Alex only met a couple of times, passing in the hallways, no time for any more words or kisses to exchange. The interns spent most of their spare time at Alex's house, which got a little awkward sometimes when Dr. Yang showed up, which the other interns weren't quite as used to as Jo was. Jo felt like she had to have been seeing Dr. Yang more often than her boyfriend. He only came home to sleep three or four hours, never at the same time as she was at the house to sleep. At least, she never realized when he was there. Slowly, but surely, she became very frustrated with how thing were left between them. She needed to be with him, NOW.


	2. 10x03

[10x03]

Jo felt all kinds of emotions while riding on Alex's shoulder up the stairs to his bedroom. Most of it was relief – final relief of the nagging feeling she had been nursing, that he didn't even wanna be with her. Happiness about finally getting to spend time together. Well, more like elation. Nerves – mostly because of the slight vertigo of hanging upside down. Deep surprise – never having imagined Alex doing something like that. And all those emotions were drowned out by hysterical laughter about the situation. Jo felt bubbly. He was going fast, too. With her on his shoulder. Not in bad shape, Mister. Well, she was going to find out just how well he was in shape in a moment or two. They entered the master bedroom, which was dark, and Alex closed the door behind him, a little too passionately. He swiftly grazed the back of her thighs up to her bottom to pull her down from his shoulders, which added another emotion to Jo's list. Desire. In between everything else, there was one thing she had forgotten, only for a moment. What they were about to do. Alex locked both his hands on her hips and slowly pulled her from her previous position, down to where they faced each other. Both their shirts were dragged upwards slightly, making a tiny part of their bodies touch. Both their skin seemed to be burning. Jo took a deep breath, still not touching her feet to the floor, resting in Alex's arms, her head a few inches above his, their faces close, but not touching, their eyes deadly locked. The air between them seemed to be electric. Alex's arms around her widened one tenth of an inch which made her slide down very slowly, making them both feel each other's complete arousal. They lunged into a passionate kiss. Alex let Jo slide down all the way and pulled her close again, once she was steady. This was an exaggeration; Jo didn't feel like she could ever be 'steady' again with her boyfriend kissing her like that.

Alex put everything into that kiss that had been piling up for that one excruciatingly long week. Well, for him it had been more than a week of waiting. But a week ago he had gotten a glimpse of what it would be like for him to be with Jo. And then they were circumstantially pulled apart and his desire and all his emotions were put on hold. Now was the time for them to be explored and let free. His emotions didn't come slowly but they flowed into that kiss which took them both into a different universe. Both their minds were wiped clean of anything that might have been pondering in there. All that counted was happening here, in their embrace. Jo had put her arms around Alex's neck to help herself up and Alex's hands held her body tightly against his strong and muscular frame. The kiss was passionate and wild, both longing for more every additional second they were touching each other. They were both fighting hard to not have to let go, only taking short breaks to breathe. Alex's hands wrestled their way underneath Jo's shirt and explored her defined back. This added another sensation to his already full mind. Her lips were sweet, soft, perfect. Her kisses longing and deep, anticipating his speed and intensity. Her body flush against his made him want to rip all her clothes off and start exploring every inch. It felt so good. She felt so good. Her smell was natural and clean, with a scent of something…something that he would later define as just Jo. The feel of her skin on his hands gave him a brain overload. Her skin was soft and toned and pleasantly heated. She wriggled slightly to let him know she was ready for him to take off her shirt. Or at least that's what he interpreted. He let both hands find their ways upwards underneath her shirt taking it with him. He broke the kiss, only to give her a thrilling stare and get rid of her shirt altogether. His look on her made Jo cringe with pleasure. She felt shaky on her feet. This felt not real to her. She had never in her life wanted someone so badly. Not being able to actually contemplate what to do next, she let her instincts drive her and reached for his shirt to get lost in return. She sighed deeply, taking in the sight before her. Alex was still watching her like a hawk, reaching for her sides, pulling her flush again, half-naked torso meeting naked torso, melting in another spectacular kiss. They synchronically moaned in each other's mouth with pleasure, making them smile slightly. Jo's hands were roaming Alex's upper body, while he started to kiss her behind her ear, down her neck, making her sigh contently. She traced his muscles back up to his neck and face and looked him in the eyes deeply, trying to tell him with her eyes how much she wanted and needed this. They quickly bounded back to another mind blowing kiss, Alex pulling Jo towards his bed within their embrace, moving slightly clumsily due to him walking backwards. His calves hit the edge of the bed and he sat down on it, taking his girl with him. She straddled him, getting a good feel of how hard he had gotten which made her moan even louder. Their breathing was already way out of bounds and Jo felt how wet she was herself not being able to condemn her desire for that man. They moved to a half lying position, Alex still trying to touch every possible part of Jo's body at once, making her jerk every now and then and moan.

"God, Alex," she spit out, almost coming on the spot, while he was trying to get rid of Jo's jeans; this was slightly difficult considering that she was still straddling him. They managed to do it at last and Alex sent it flying off the bed immediately. He had been trying to get into a sitting position to not have to break the kiss. Both of them put so much passion in their deeds that they almost couldn't handle it. Jo pushed Alex back down, breaking their last kiss, to trail a bunch of kisses down his torso, feeling his muscular upper body tense underneath her soft hands, making him sigh in satisfaction. She went to work on his pants which she got off pretty easily and momentarily played with the hem of his boxers to tease him.

"Don't you dare," Alex breathed out heavily, trying to control himself. Jo chuckled quietly at his obvious problems to keep it in him and released his huge, pulsing erection from the constraints of his shorts. She gasped unwillingly at the sight of this but quickly gained control and made to pleasure him with kisses. "Jo," Alex gasped loudly, when she came in contact with his private parts. She smiled against his parts but wasn't in the slightest bit done with her mission. Jo enclosed his penis with her fingers and started to rub him gently. Simultaneously she showered him with kisses and gentle touches to his balls and backside. "Jo, please," Alex grunted slightly, trapped between not wanting her to make him come like that for their first time and not being able to stop his ultimate pleasure. Seeing his reaction to her touches, Jo had to contain herself. She could hardly stand the wait any longer and her panties were almost all wet with her juices. She moaned in ecstasy. Alex bucked his hips lightly against her hand and face, revealing how close he was to orgasm. Jo took one look at her boyfriend's blissful face before taking his penis into her mouth and started sucking on it hard. "No, Jo, please, God, don't-" Alex tried to stop her from finishing her evil deed. Jo got herself up and hovered over Alex's face.

"Just-," she whispered, lust lacing her voice heavily, "shhhh," she said and kissed him fully on the mouth. Quickly she came down to his member again and took it into her mouth, sucking on it varying between gentle sucks and hard ones, taking her fingers to rub the base of his penis. It didn't take long. A few seconds later she had to hold her lover down for him to not start pumping and Alex came so hard that he lost all control of his mind. Jo kissed up another trail to reach her boyfriends face and kissed him hard, being very close to orgasm herself, watching him come because of her. She was still straddling him, feeling how his erection hadn't subsided yet, which made her tummy twinge. She was so hot for this guy, she couldn't believe it. Alex kissed her back feverishly and fumbled with her bra to open it somehow and lost it instantly after achieving the deed. He pulled her down, taking one breast into his hand while sucking on the other nipple. Jo groaned.

"Alex, please," she called out louder than she had anticipated. As if on cue he took hold of his penis to try to enter her, realizing, she still had her panties on. He almost ripped them off of her, not being able to hold the suspense. He had propped himself up on some cushions, her still straddling him. Finally having abandoned all clothing that came between them, he took one hand and felt her wetness which she reacted to with a gasp. Alex raised his eyebrows.

"I have been letting you wait too long," he whispered into her ear. He kissed her, sweetly this time, expressing everything he ever wanted to tell her which almost made her eyes water a bit. Jo was hurting inside from all the overwhelming emotions she had been feeling that night.

"Protection?" he asked suddenly, making her return to reality in an instant, leaving her feeling vulnerable and cold.

"Um, yeah," she stuttered, unable to believe that she had lost all common sense due to this heavenly man. "Yeah, of course," she smiled slightly, trying to get back to control. She was breathing uncontrollably, straddling Alex who had just leaned over to his nightstand to retrieve a condom which he was now trying to open. She watched him at it, wondering how in the world she would have lived without him. Once unwrapped, she took the condom out of his hands and run it down his penis slowly, making him moan again, while he kept touching her private parts softly, rhythmically, making her eyes close on their own accord. He encircled her clit one more time before guiding his penis for her to slide down onto him. They both sighed in content, shortly stopping to give them both time to accommodate before Alex locked both his hands on her hips and they started moving quickly. Jo couldn't think anymore, she couldn't breathe anymore, she couldn't talk anymore, all she could is drown in the sensation of Alex grinding into her. His hardness felt so good in her soft confines, they fit perfectly together, him stretching her immensely, her wetness engulfing him. Alex reached up to worry her clit slightly which made her cry out loudly.

"Ohhh, Alex, please don't stop," she gasped without much thinking. Both their climaxes seemed so close but they couldn't even think about stopping what they were doing. Jo was driving Alex mad with her body and how it felt on him. He didn't know what he could do to make this even better. This felt so good, he needed more, harder, deeper, he needed her so much. He pulled her down into another passionate kiss, dueling with her tongue which made them both see black spots and once she was all in his control, he took the initiative and flipped her over to lie between her legs, surprising her with his action. They both groaned deeply for having changed their position and finding new spots to pleasure.

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't take it anymore," Alex whispered with a small smirk before closing the gap between their luscious lips once more and pumping in and out of her feverishly. Jo put her legs around his hips and brought her hands down his back to softly massage the sensitive spot between Alex's shaft and balls, which made him come immediately, completely losing control over his body and mind. Jo joined in a second later, crying out his name multiple times, moaning uncontrollably, seeing stars and black spots all over her usually perfect vision, descending into a world of pleasure and satisfaction.

Thinking about their first time together later on, Jo couldn't remember for how long they had been lying in each other's embrace, coming down after their mutual high. She had to blush when she thought back to how Alex had catapulted her out of this world and the feeling of true bliss and pleasure that she had never wanted to end. She could still feel how her heart beat had raced, vibrating all over her body, through every vein, trying to catch her breath, Alex's head resting on her chest, his beard tickling her nipples. She remembered how she felt like everything in the world was right, everything had played out as it was supposed to be. She didn't know anything about her future, but she was sure about one thing. If it was up to her she was going to be with Alex. At whatever cost. She just knew, she couldn't let him go, not after knowing what it was like to be with him. Physically, emotionally, cognitively. After a while of just breathing out their highs and slowing down their heartbeats, Alex started to run his fingers up and down Jo's waist. She smiled slightly.

"Haven't you had enough?" she teased in a newly found confidence. Alex turned his head around to look at her sarcastically, supporting himself on his elbow.

"Have you?"

Jo had to laugh. Everything was so easy. "Well, as a matter of fact I am up for another round," she said holding up one finger. "I have one condition, though," she stated theatrically.

"What's that?" Alex raised his eyebrows curiously.

"We need to slow down a bit. If we keep doing it like that," she emphasized the last word, referencing their recent lovemaking, "you are going to give me a heart attack sooner or later," she concluded, trailing her fingers down Alex's stubbles lovingly. Alex let out a loud chuckle.

"Oh really," Alex came back. "YOU fear about YOUR well-being? You were killing me there, woman!" he added looking most serious. Jo bit her lower lip and smiled awkwardly. The feeling she got when Alex talked about what effects she had on him was incredible. She averted her eyes to stare at her hand, still holding his neck. He looked at her seriously. She was way too important to him to just let this go.

"You need to stop getting so self-conscious when I'm around," Alex said with a smile. Jo immediately bounced to her self-defense and playfully slapped his shoulder. "You don't need to be embarrassed about telling me how much I turn you on," he said. "I mean, look at me!" Jo laughed out loud.

"Oh really?" she glared at him, trying to conceal her huge grin about his narcissistic declaration.

"M-hm," Alex just nodded exaggeratedly, slowly moving his whole body upwards to be on eye-level with Jo, resting both his elbows on either side of her, feeling how her nipples hardened underneath his muscular torso. She took a deep breath, looking him in the eye. He kissed her shoulder, and her neck, "You know, maybe I should show you again, just how good I make you feel," he whispered seductively into her left ear, making her shudder and close her eyes for a second. He grazed her lips in passing, turning his attention to the other side of her neck, while opening her legs with his.

"Alex," she whispered, ready for some more action. He smiled against the crook of her neck. He came back up, giving her a piercing look that made her insides churn and kissed her passionately. Her hands that were roaming his muscled chest before made a quick move to his hair, where they anchored themselves. "I do think we're not done here," Alex whispered between kisses. He broke after one more feverish kiss to trail down open mouthed kisses on her chest, teasing her nipples, way down to her bellybutton, her hands still resting on his head. Jo's heart rate was already way up and her breathing far from steady. He slowly grazed the insides of her thighs, making his way to her private parts extra long and teasing.

"God, and you call me a tease?" Jo snapped at him in between moans. With a smile, Alex slowly entered his girlfriend with one finger and then two. She was so wet he could feel how his erection started to hurt again. He kissed her opening and started to massage her clit. Jo arched her back, bucking her hips at his touches. He smiled against her parts. His tongue was dancing in and out of her while his thumbs were rhythmically worrying her special spot. Jo's moans got louder and she held the bed sheets on both sides of her in a tight grip, trying to enjoy the sensation of Alex doing his magic.

"Alex, please," she whispered desperately, when he stopped for a moment to watch her intently. He smiled. What a perfect woman he had found for himself. Never in his life had he been so fulfilled. He wanted to stay like this forever. He took the three middle fingers of his right hand end entered her, teasing the spot right underneath her clit, which again he worried with his thumb. He kissed the inside of Jo's right thigh, inching closer to her parts again and when removing his hand he sucked on her clit when she came even harder than before. Jo moaned loudly, contracting wildly, sprinkling Alex with her juices, shuddering with every additional kiss he rewarded her with. Alex's eyes were focused on her face entirely. He had never seen such beauty. Completely unconscious of the fact that he was watching her come because of him, completely uncontrolled, just pure, natural beauty. His erection reminded him of how horny he was for that beauty. He inched up slowly, lying down on the side and taking her with him, her head resting in the crook of his shoulder, letting her breath it out. He held her close, softly grazing his fingers up and down her back, giving her goose bumps.

"Are you okay?" Alex asked softly after a few minutes. Jo smiled against his chest, eyes still closed.

"More than ok," she whispered, clear enough for him to hear it. He pulled her closer, both of them lying on their sides, Jo wrapping her arms around him as well. Alex kissed her cheeks and face before hugging her tightly. Jo sighed contently, certain about having found her absolute safe haven. She kissed his shoulder tenderly before voicing softly, what she hadn't been able to form in her mind until that moment. "I am so terribly in love with you, Alex."

Alex smiled contently, not knowing how he managed to get into this position. He started running his fingers up and down her back again and pulled them a couple of inches apart to look at her. She stared back at his eyes longingly, waiting for a response. He smiled.

"Good," he said, making her close her eyes and giggle. He kissed her softly. "I am not planning on letting you leave in the foreseeable future," he added. They kissed again.

"You know, I was once wondering how couples just keep kissing and kissing each other and concluded it must really get boring at some point," Jo rambled all of a sudden, Alex looking at her in surprise. "Well, I understand now," she explained. "If you told me to kiss you for the rest of my life and not do anything else, I'd be totally fine with it." Alex shook his head in amusement.

"That's what you say now," he said. "Let's talk about this in fifteen years." Jo raised her eyebrows at her boyfriend's statement. He blushed slightly. "Or, I mean, you know… next week or some time." Jo chuckled loudly.

"You should probably stop being so self-conscious around me as well," she added half mockingly, half lovingly. Alex smiled sheepishly. Jo initiated another kiss. "For right now, though, we should really do something about that awfully needy member of yours that won't subside." She concluded matter-of-factly. Alex gave her big eyes. "God, Alex, don't get your knickers in a twist, I am proposing sex to you here," she said exasperatedly. He rolled his eyes at her.

"Is it your day off tomorrow?" Alex asked suspiciously.

"You got it, mister," she responded quickly. They both smiled.

"Well, luckily, so is mine," he said. "Let's see who makes who beg for mercy first," he added.

"You are so on," she chuckled, making herself mentally ready for the challenge, trying to blank out the huge erection between them that would make her weak eventually. She reached down to caress his length, while Alex's hands had found her boobs and meanwhile, seducing her with a super intense kiss. Alex's penis was pulsating, it felt so good to just touch him, rub him, make him squirm. Alex disengaged his hands from her boobs and reached for her butt, which he gripped tightly before turning around to lie on his back and make her straddle him again. She still had him in a tight embrace, their tongues dueling wildly. Sitting up, his penis grazed her private parts softly, making her realize how ready she was – again – and how ready she was probably going to be for the rest of her life, for the man, she had given her heart, mind and body to.

Alex woke up to an empty bed. He was wrapped up in one of the sheets; the rest of them were hanging halfway down to the floor. He turned to look at what time it was. 9:13 am. He couldn't have been sleeping for more than four hours. Weirdly, he felt wrecked and energized at the same time. He grinned slightly, thinking about the previous night. What a night. He buried his head in his pillow again. Dozing off a bit, his mind raced with thoughts and emotions and sensations from last night. Her smell. Her skin. Her touch. Her words. Don't get too excited. Again. Alex chastised himself. From one moment to the next, he opened his eyes widely, trying to make out any noise whatsoever going on within the house. Where the hell had Jo gone off to? Alex slowly got up and softly plunged the door to his bathroom open, even though he already knew she wasn't in there. It was dark. Grudgingly, he went to look for his boxers that he wasn't able to locate for a bit since it seemed like forever ago that Jo had gotten rid of them. He toddled out of the master bed room, checking the other bathroom and slowly stepping downstairs. The only thing he found was emptiness. No Jo. No anyone. A big question mark was building itself above his head. He went to the fridge to empty a carton of milk and walked upstairs again. There's no need to freak out or be mad, he told himself. She had probably just gone out for coffee. Or check on a patient. Or she got what she wanted last night and took off. Alex shook his head about his own stupidity. You are acting like a fourteen year old teenager. She had told him what she felt for him. Only hours ago. There was no way she had been lying. He banged the bedroom door behind him – a little too loudly - and got back in bed, burying his head in the pillow. Just wait for her to come home. He felt how disappointment and dread set in his guts. He was annoyed for feeling like that. Jo wasn't like that. Their feelings for each other were real. She would never do that to him. Why was he feeling like that? Well, probably because that is what his body and mind and…. well, soul expected from what he had gotten used to ever since he could remember. Just sleep it off, Alex told himself. You'll wake up and then you'll deal with whatever comes your way. Just wait.

Jo was just running around the corner of Blaine Street and 5th when an image of an old, super cute lady crowded her mind. Crap. In between studying for her intern tests and working and investing all her energy in thinking Alex didn't want to do her, she totally forgot about Ruth. Crap, crap, crap. She had gone to see Ruth every freaking week since she had moved to Seattle. How could she just forget? Well, there was that thing about what happened with Jason. And then the storm. And the exams. And Alex. Gahhh! She needed to go see her. And she really needed her to meet Alex. Alex. Last night was absolutely perfect. Jo tried to not smile too widely, creeping out passing people by weirdly making happy faces at them. What happened the night before was more than she had ever dared to dream of. Weirdly, when she woke up, only three hours after finally deciding they had had enough exercise for… well, probably, a lifetime, she hadn't even felt a little worn out. She had gotten up, not being able to hold still next to that gorgeous man, already half thinking about jumping him again, however, not daring to wake the completely blissful looking Alex, and decided to go for a run. She needed some time to be with herself. She needed time to process all the feelings she had experienced the night before. And she really, really needed to stretch. She chuckled again. Jo felt a little like Alex had deflowered her all over again. She had never in her life had a night like that. Jo tried to not think about the details too much. There was no way she was going to be horny again once she got home. Just… chill. You'll need to be able to not wanna do it all the time for the rest of your life. At least at work. He's still your superior, remember. Stretching her muscles to their limit was good. It was perfect.

When Alex woke again, he heard the dull sound of a shower. He smiled. Good choice not to freak out completely. She was just out for whatever reason. She's back now. He could feel how his body and mood warmed up instantly. For one moment he thought about getting up and joining her. The next moment he had dozed off again.

"Hey, old man," Jo whispered softly, placing a trail of kisses up Alex's spine. She had put on a robe, hair still dripping and casually lying down next to Alex and tried to wake him. Alex grunted sleepily and turned his body around to face her. She smiled at the drowsy state of her boyfriend. He looped one arm around Jo's waist and pulled her close, nestling his head in the crook of her shoulder and neck.

"Whayadoinubb?" he murmured against her freshly scrubbed skin. She chuckled softly.

"I was out for a run," she started to small talk lazily, painting shapes on Alex's heat radiating skin on his back.

"Didn't you get enough exercise last night?" he kissed her collarbone sloppily.

"Well, I did. I just felt so energized when I woke up, I needed to get out for a while."

"Why didn't you wake me?" he trailed off, sucking softly on the sensitive spot he had found on Jo's neck the previous night. Jo closed her eyes.

"What, to go for a run with me?" she sighed.

"No, silly, for another round of de-energizing," he chuckled against her skin which was covered in goose bumps by now. There was comfortable silence between them, both just basking in each other's presence. After a few minutes, Alex finally got his eyes open and scooted up to look at her face to face. She smiled at him sincerely, caressing his cheek softly. He kissed her.

"Sorry for the morning breath," he apologized quietly.

"What's that look you are giving me?" she asked comfortably resting in his arms.

"There's no look," he said neutrally.

"Yes, there is. I know your looks. Some of them give me the creeps, by the way," she chuckled. He raised his eyebrows.

"I am going to use that against you." Jo initiated another soft peck.

"Tell me," she said convincingly but not pressing.

"I really have no idea what you are talking about," he answered honestly. They lay there for a while, enjoying the silence.

"You thought I had gone, am I right?" Jo suddenly stated, looking into his eyes.

"How did you read that off my face?" She shrugged.

"Dr. Grey might think she speaks Alex fluently, but I'm not that bad either," she said. Alex knitted his eyebrows in part confusion part amusement. "And you are wearing shorts," Jo added truthfully. "That can only mean you got up and went to look for me and – of course - couldn't find me," she concluded.

"And you are not hurt that I wasn't worried and called you or something a good boyfriend would do?" Jo smiled.

"No. First thing you conclude to is someone let you down." They both succumbed to silence again. "I am not going to let you down, Alex," Jo whispered softly, still holding her boyfriend in a tight embrace. Alex kissed her shoulder lovingly.

"I know," Alex said. "Well, at least I think I know."

* * *

><p><strong>Note:<strong> _For all those who didn't read Change of Plans - I know this chapter mentioned Ruth... she is a character that has been integrated in that story. When I started writing Change of Plans, I altered some one-shots to fit with the story to actually use them later... but I never got around to put it in the story eventually (other than as a bonus). Just letting you know, didn't wanna change the one shot again. _


	3. 10x04

[10x04]

Jo felt so crappy. She hadn't felt like this in a very long time. Part of her wanted to run after Alex, however, the more rational part told her not to. She had done this to him. She had made this his problem. The whole situation wouldn't have been his problem if she had just shut up about the results. But then again, what would that have been? Her knowing and not telling him? Why had they not thought this through before? Jo put her face into her hands, resting her elbows at the nurses' counter, sighing. Right now, all she wanted to do is vomit. This night couldn't have gone worse. First, Alex had been all dismissive at the party and she had been annoyed and pissed, having to talk up donors without him. Then she had found him in the exam room and for a second, her whole world had crumbled, thinking Alex was using whatever the good stuff was at the moment. Her entire body had relaxed when he had barked at her then, and she had felt like everything else was to be managed. Everything else was easy as pie. It just had to be talked through. As long as he wasn't an addict, everything was fine. And now this. What was she supposed to do now? _Why couldn't she just have shut up?! Ughhh. _

Jo startled when someone prodded her side and she looked up. "What the heck are you doing here?" Leah asked her suspiciously.

"I'm just… ugh, I don't know," she said, looking back at her fellow intern exhaustedly.

"Well, then go look after your _boyfriend. _I've had enough babysitting for the night," Leah ranted, making Jo frown.

"What?" she spat out, irritated by Leah's cryptic instructions.

"I had to babysit and serve Kepner and Robbins all night. For some reason they got really trashed in the supply closet," Leah narrated in a mockingly cheerful tone, bouncing from one foot to the other and making wide eyes.

"Not that part," Jo waved her away, annoyed.

"Oh, yeah, your boyfriend is raging away in the stairways. I don't know what's his problem," Leah told her with a disgusted hissing sound at the end, looking like he had gone crazy. Jo closed her eyes and shook her head at Leah, pissed.

"Just," she told her flippantly. "Mind your own business," she said.

"Alright," Leah said, backing off with her hands raised. "Just thought you wanted to know."

_Yeah, whatever, Leah. If I knew what to do I'd have done it by now, don't you think? _Jo turned around to look at Alex's dad ruefully. If she followed him now, what was she even going to say? She observed the man's sleeping demeanor for a moment, studying him. She didn't know much about Alex's history… he had told her some snippets, but she had soon learned that his childhood was not something he liked to talk about a lot. And she didn't wanna push him. She was glad about things he enjoyed to share with her and even more than that, she was happy to have him trust her at all. However, what she did know was how this person lying in that very bed had supposedly made Alex's childhood hell, and that was something Jo couldn't wrap her head around. He looked so peaceful. He looked so harmless. She hadn't seen or met him yet in a conscious state of mind, nevertheless, she really couldn't imagine how that person could do any harm. Towards women. Towards kids. Anyone really. Now that she thought of it… he really looked like a grandpa. A loving, playful, joking grandpa – Jo let her mind roam and she could actually see it before her eyes how their kids gathered around him, trying to be the first to be climbing his lap, him telling them stories or something. _Whoa, whoa, wait, what? Did you actually just think about having kids with Alex? Oh my, girl, you really have to stick to reality once and again. You are in way over your head… you _just _sealed the deal with your boyfriend. Pace yourself. _

Jo took another deep breath and pushed herself off the counter to walk towards where she had watched Alex walk off to and tried to find him somewhere along the road. She pushed the door towards the stairways open and walked over towards the middle, looking up and down to maybe spot him. When she didn't, she sighed, and walked upwards, since she thought he may have headed towards the attendings' lounge which was further up. Jo held her dress up while walking, not being able to stop fidgeting with it since she was nervous and almost slightly scared what was going to happen. They hadn't even been going out for… well, too long and she had already initiated their first fall out. _Way to go, Jo! _Her breathing hitched when she turned the corner of the stairs and spotted her boyfriend sitting at bottom of the next flight of stairs. They matched eyes and she tried to decipher how he was doing and if or if not to come any closer. She gulped and decided to take a leap. If she didn't dare talk to her boyfriend when at odds, then maybe they shouldn't have gone into a relationship at all. Alex had focused on a spot somewhere on the ground when Jo had reached him and she stood before him not knowing what to do or say. Silence engulfed them for several moments.

"Talk to me," Alex pulled Jo out of her trance with speaking up, making her frown.

"Okay," she said softly, insecure about what was going to happen. "What do you wa-," she started but he had already shaped his words again.

"You said if I talked to you, I'd find out that you're actually pretty smart," he pointed out, without even looking at her.

"Um… I'm not sure what y-," Jo muttered, feeling how her nerves were flaring up. She felt like crying when Alex reached out his hand to match it with hers. _Thank you, thank you!_

"You said once I took the test and I knew that it wasn't him that freaking feeling would go away," he told her, slowly, finally looking up at her, making her sigh and look at him in pain.

"I'm sorry," she breathed out, shaking her head.

"I need you to tell me what to do now. Cause the feeling hasn't gone away," Jo's guts coiled uncomfortably when she looked into his eyes and they radiated helplessness. She gulped before taking a step closer and turning to sit next to him on the stairs, holding onto his thigh.

"I'm sorry, Alex, I wasn't thinking…," she said, matching their eyes again.

"Tell me how to go on from this. You are the smart one, tell me," Alex looked at her like a lost little puppy. She could sense how talking and repeating the stuff they had talked about before actually made him feel like she could actually help him, she had a solution for this, she could make it better. She sighed, taking the side of his face and guiding it down to lean her forehead onto his.

"I don't know what to tell you, Alex, I don't know how to deal with this at the moment, either, I'm so sorry I made you be in that situation," she whispered. Alex sighed, putting an arm around her and making her cuddle closer, kissing her head.

"Stop beating yourself up about it, crap like that happens," he told her eventually, making a huge rock unlatch from her heart and drift away. "And help me deal with this, please," Jo's insides cringed again at hearing his voice. There was so much pain in there.

"We'll find a way to deal with it, okay? How about we try to get some sleep and tomorrow morning, we'll see if you maybe feel like talking to him? You know… um… reconnect… I mean there must be something you guys can talk about… maybe… um… baseball or something…," she suggested, uncertain about Alex's reaction, rambling on, scared to stop and face what he was gonna tell her. There was a short pause and then he chuckled.

"You are sweet, you know that?" he pointed out, before she pulled back and looked at him.

"Well, sometimes I wish I'd think about what things come out of my mouth, though, first, before talking," she said, beating herself up by what had happened. Alex gave her a small smile before pushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Sorry for running off," he said gently.

"You had every right to," she gave him back. They looked at each other, timidly, before Alex reached out to cup her cheek and kissed her softly. When they pulled back, Jo quarreled with herself to voice her thoughts. "I know you don't usually do… but if you need to talk about things… I'm here, you know," she said, turning her eyes down and cuddling into his shoulder.

"I know," he breathed against her head, kissing it again, before putting his on top and silence engulfed them once again. _They might not know how to go on from this, but at least, they were trying to do it together. _


	4. 10x05

_[10x05]_

Alex sat at the bar, waiting for Joe to replace his already empty beer with another one, pondering. The talking and laughing and squealing around him unnerved him immensely but right now, the last thing he wanted to do was go home. He knew Jo had only meant well, but she had done enough for one day. Of course, he understood, his dad had always been a charmer. He sure wasn't letting his rough side, his tendency to abandon people, his family, his tendency to shoot himself up until he couldn't walk anymore, talk anymore, his habits of beating people he didn't wanna or couldn't deal with properly, he sure wasn't letting all of this come to the surface now that he had been admitted here, and so, all Jo got to see was the charming, joking, friendly side of Alex's father, that Alex wished he had saved for back when they had still been trying to be a family. Back when his mom was still okay and him and his siblings had needed a dad. He was happy for Jo that she actually had met him and thought highly of him, or maybe she just cared that much for Alex that she couldn't watch his dad get discharged and use again. The thing was: that man wasn't his dad. Not anymore. He had closed on that one.

Alex scrolled down on the website he had looked up on his phone and checked the dates and bars Jimmy was supposed to play at while in Seattle. He could deny it all he wanted, but he was curious. _Maybe he should go listen for just one night. _His dad hadn't even realized who he was, so that was safe. He just had to try hiding it from everyone else. He didn't wanna make a big deal about it. He looked through the playlists they had posted, recognizing a couple of songs before startling when somebody nudged his side softly, making him immediately hit the lock button on his phone to hide what he was doing and looking over, spotting Jo standing beside him.

"Hey," he just said before turning around towards Joe who was still working on his beer. "Make that two," he told him, turning back towards Jo who smiled at him slightly. She got up on the barstool and sat down, facing him. "What are you smiling at?" he asked her, when she wouldn't say anything. She just shrugged.

"I didn't know if you'd let me sit with you," Jo said and thanked Joe for her beer, sipping at it and sighing in content. Alex rolled his eyes and took a drink as well. "How was your day?" she inquired, engaging in some small talk.

"Fine," he responded dismissively. There was a short pause in which Jo fidgeted to shape some words.

"So, I didn't know you have your mom's last name," she pointed out, trying to match their eyes since Alex still hadn't turned to look at her. When he did, he looked pissed.

"I told you no-," he started but Jo interrupted him.

"I'm not talking about him. I'm talking about your mom's last name," she said, narrowing her eyes at him, having anticipated the objection. Alex sighed and looked down at his beer.

"You think you're so smart, huh," he turned over at her and saw her grinning and wriggling her eyebrows at him.

"M-hm, yeah, I kinda do," she told him smiling widely, moving her head from side to side in a sovereign motion. Alex snorted, shaking his head. "So?"

"Yeah, there isn't anything to say to it, really," he countered when she wouldn't budge. Jo pushed her lips together and nodded very slowly and he knew it was because she didn't believe him. "Well, do you wanna tell me anything about where your last name came from," he asked her exasperatedly, knowing he had taken a step too far, looking at her insecurely. Against all expectation, Jo looked at him wide-eyed and smiled, her lips agape and staring at him unbelievingly.

"Wow, that was a really low blow," she pointed out to him, making him sigh.

"Yeah, sorry," he said, giving her an apologetic face before taking another drag of his beer. "I didn't mean to go there," he added, making her nod and observe him. When he didn't move, she leaned over, resting her right elbow on the bar, putting her head onto it, and smoothing her left hand over his hair, cupping his cheek.

"I'm sorry I'm giving you a hard time," Jo told him, apparently having decided that playful was not the way to get closer. Alex sighed looking over.

"It's not you," he answered, trying to meet her halfway as well. "I just still don't know what to make of it," he said. "All of it."

"I know," she agreed. "But I'm not making it easier in pushing you towards him, am I right?"

"Well, not exactly," Alex chuckled slightly, moving his face inside her palm and kissing it. Jo smiled at him and pulled back.

"Okay, I'll back off, I promise," she told him. "I shouldn't have butted it. But you know… after what happened with me telling you about the results without you even wanting to hear them, I just… I needed to do something… I thought if I could make it right-," Jo rambled on but stopped when seeing his face.

"You're doing it again," Alex warned her.

"What?"

"Talking about him," he just said, staring down again.

"Oh crap, I'm sorry," Jo shook her head, irritated with herself. "I think I'm confused. Let's just talk about something else, alright?" she tried to sound cheerful but Alex wouldn't respond. When they had sat there for a moment without talking, Jo bit her lip and hesitated. "Do you want me to leave you alone? Go somewhere else? I can… I mean… I can catch a ride with somebody… or I mean…," she tried to think of a reasonable solution.

"Nah, you're fine," Alex shook his head and extended his arm to squeeze Jo's thigh, making her smile.

"Do you wanna go play darts? The vendor is available…," she suggested, pointing at the machine uncertainly.

"Yeah, sure, let's do that," Alex agreed, getting up slowly, shaking out his legs and grabbing his beer to carry it over. While he watched Jo adjust the machine for their game, he pondered. "You know, we should talk about stakes," he said, observing her slender physique, his eyes resting on her behind and trailing up towards her waist and then boobs when she turned and grinned at him.

"Oh, you wanna bet?" Jo walked closer slowly, having seen and depicted his face instantly, smiling seductively.

"M-hm," he just said, growing desire inside of him while she was still slowly closing the gap between them. She looked up at him, running her tongue along her lower lip that was playing a nonchalant smile, teasing him, their faces inches apart, and Alex's hand slowly moving downwards to place it on her lower back, pushing her against him softly. They smiled at each other and tried to read each other's next moves.

"Well, what did you have in mind?" she said, just as she was leaning in for a slow kiss but then pulled back again when he could feel her lips being only a breath away and wriggled her eyebrows at him playfully. Alex chuckled.

"I don't know," he bent down to breathe into her ear hotly, sensing the chills that formed on her skin and knowing she was about to burst with lust and desire, feeling her slight shudder. "Do you have any suggestions?" he pulled back to look at her.

"Hmm…," Jo pondered theatrically, raising her hands up and pointing her index fingers on his chest, running them up and down as if she was deciding between two options. Alex laughed about their advances, making each other go nuts. It was good fun. And he welcomed the distraction. He grabbed her fingers with the hand he wasn't holding her to him and snapped them away making her widen her eyes.

"I have an idea," he said, pushing her another inch closer, making her chest touch his now as well.

"Do tell," she murmured, running her nose up his chest towards his neck and spoiling him with nuzzles.

"Remember how you said I've always been so angry," he asked her all of a sudden, his voice and demeanor changing completely, Jo scrunching up her face since he was kinda breaking the spell they were under.

"Um, yeah," she replied, frustrated with him. "What about it?"

"Well, so have you," he told her matter-of-factly, looking down at her smiling.

"What? BS! I'm not angry, what would I be angry about?" she immediately ranted stridently. Alex just laughed.

"Thank you for making that point, spot on, really!" he made her narrow his eyes at him.

"Oh come on, that was just… a little bit of cursing," she tried to defend herself.

"Yeah, and what you did to Jason was just trying to mend fences?" he looked at her questioningly. Jo was taken aback by that. They hadn't ever really talked about what happened before they got together much. She had thought maybe that was best to be put to rest.

"What's it with all the low blows tonight?" she asked him, uncertain about his motives.

"I didn't mean to conjure up bad memories," Alex explained himself, bringing his second hand up and ran it through her hairline before placing it at her neck. "I just thought… we both could use some… _simmering_ _down_," he said, realizing that he had maybe actually gone a step too far when Jo only looked at her hands that rested on his chest.

"I defended myself, you realize that, right?" she spoke up again after a moment, looking at his eyes.

"I do. And I'm not criticizing you. I'm saying, we are both hot headed and sometimes… our emotions just ball up in our fists… and all four of them are probably lethal… right?" he moved further slowly, getting to his point.

"Alright?" she tried to follow.

"Whoever will lose this tonight, will have to sign up for anger management classes and attend them for at least five sessions…or something," he smirked at her. Jo pulled back her head and hiked her eyebrows.

"Ha! I would have never in my life thought that such a reasonable request would come out of your mouth," she told him, making him chuckle.

"Well," he admitted. "You got me thinking…," he said. "Without talking about anyone specifically," he told her while averting his eyes to make clear who he was talking about. "It scared me today that I realized that I may not be able to face some people without becoming violent," he said, making her nod.

"Okay, I'm in," Jo tried to diffuse the tension and they shook on it officially. "One game?" Alex nodded.

"Loser is compelled to manage his or her anger, winner… whatever… will stay angry forever more," he said, making Jo chuckle with his stupid ramblings. When she turned around, meaning to start the game, Alex pulled her back against his chest for a moment, running his fingers down her side, making her gasp and look down on the ground, listening to what he was going to say since he had brought his lips to her ear. "And with saying that I can't think about some people without growing violent… I meant Jason also, just thought you should know…," he said, making her close her eyes and sway in his embrace for a second.

"I know," she said after a moment. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be, I just don't want either of us doing something like that ever again," he pointed out. Jo turned her face towards him and smiled.

"Me neither," she breathed before they finally moved in and kissed, forgetting the people around them for a second, before smacking apart gleefully and staring at each other with a wide smile.

"Let's do this," Alex slapped her behind and got her to move. He scrambled his cell phone out of his pocket and looked back down at the playlist, he had checked out before Jo had come into the bar. He sighed and closed the website, looking up at Jo who was already throwing the darts, cheering for herself. He had to smile. _Life could be hard at times. But sometimes it could really wait until the morning. _


	5. 10x06

[10x06]

Jo tentatively opened Alex's bedroom door. She wasn't entirely sure how Alex would react to her following him after their fight. She couldn't stay away, though. Not now. Not ever. They had to talk it out. She couldn't lose him over this. She had just got him. The only light putting the room in a dim glow came from Alex's nightstand. He was lying down on his side, facing away from the door. Indecisive of how to handle the situation, Jo closed the door behind her; certain about thinking he must have heard her come in, quietly leaning against the closed door.

"Are you okay with me staying?" The words only came out in a whisper, not entirely ready for the answer she was going to get. Nothing happened. No reaction. She knew he wasn't sleeping. "Alex?" she tried again, softly. At this she made out a grunting sound from her boyfriend as he got up, seemingly heading towards the bathroom and banging the door close behind him. Jo closed her eyes in defeat. Tears were pricking her eyes again. _Why couldn't she have just shut up?_ She waited on Alex finishing his shower and getting into bed before doing her bathroom routine as well. When she came out, Alex was lying on his side of the bed, staring at the ceiling, the lights having all been extinguished. Slowly, Jo climbed in, turning towards Alex, trying to shape the words that she had made up in her mind. Before she could say anything, though, he turned around, facing away from her, leaving the unspoken words between them.

Jo took a deep breath. Keep your tears in, damn it. He doesn't need you to weep. He's just mad and hurt and angry, that doesn't mean he doesn't love you. We'll be just fine. With that in mind, Jo slowly inched closer to her wall facing boyfriend and kissed his naked shoulder blade. This smell, exactly what she needed right now. Her Alex. She got as close as possible, finding a way with her right arm to hug Alex's naked torso from behind and slungher left arm above his shoulder to hug him tightly to her. Alex didn't make a sign of trying to meet her halfway. That was okay with her, as long as he didn't try to fight her. She needed to just be with him, hold him, make him understand how much she needed and loved him. She kissed his shoulder and neck again, smelling the heavenly scent she couldn't get enough of.

"I am so, so sorry, baby," she whispered, sure about knowing he was still awake, trying not to explode. Knowing him, this was all she was going to get and not daring to talk any further, she snuggled against his shoulder and tried to relax and sleep. He wasn't going anywhere. He knew how much she regretted messing with his life. He had to know. Drifting off, both of them arranged themselves to fit together, perfectly as they always did, even though Alex remained as cool and unapproachable as possible while dozing off in his girl's arms. Soon, though, he was sharing the sentiment, entwining their hands and curling up their legs. Hours passed while they slept peacefully and snuggled up tightly before Alex began to move in his sleep, unconsciously closing the deal between him and his girlfriend, turning around in her arms, fitting in her embrace comfortably, kissing her neck and collarbone. Jo sighed in her sleep, not waking up until she got aroused by her boyfriend's closeness and meanwhile pretty erect penis. Trying to organize her sleep-heavy mind and not moaning too loudly in between breathing heavily, Jo tried to wake up Alex softly.

"Babe," she whispered in between not coming on the spot then and there and placing sweet kisses on Alex's jaw line and face. "Alex, wake up, please," she sighed, as she felt him press his penis against her abdomen even harder. Alex stirred a little and moaned slightly before blinking his sleepy eyes and finding out about what was going on. "Baby," Jo moaned again, trying to get him from his drowsy state to her very real, already very turned on reality. Suddenly, faster than she could react, Alex had rolled Jo over to pin her down on the bed and for one second she was afraid, he was going to yell at her or throw her out of the bed, before realizing he had just fully woken and kissed her hard, square on her lips. Jo moaned within the kiss and let his tongue enter immediately, knowing it wouldn't be long for her and as she could judge his hardness, neither for him. The kiss was angry and passionate; their tongues were dueling wildly while Alex roughly pulled down Jo's tank top and hot pants. They parted for a brief second to breathe and Jo watched the fire and anger in Alex's eyes. "Alex," she whispered, taking his face in her hands, "baby, listen, you don't-," but he cut her off with another mind blowing kiss that wiped out all doubts about his motives. She knew he was crazy mad at her, but she also knew they were both crazy in love and at some point they would talk, but right now, they just had to relish in each other's passion. Her hands snaked down his muscular torso, making him moan, finding his waistband and pulling it down teasingly slow, while he was not so playfully sucking on her weak spot behind her ear and not so playfully biting her shoulder, making her buck her hips in anticipation. Jo started massaging his very hard penis, making him cringe with pleasure. In one swift move, he had snatched both her arms and brought them above her head to pin them there which made her lie at his mercy. He gave her one last furious look and kissed her again, softly biting down on her lower lip, tracing sloppy, but purposeful kisses down her chest, teasing her already hard nipples, making her arch her back into him, moaning in anticipation and lust. She had never seen or felt him like this. They both were passionate lovers but right now they could both feel the anger and the unspoken words within their kisses and touches, they were desperate, rough, not hurtful though, but exactly where they were needed. It was like trying to fight with the words they didn't know how to say. Jo could feel her lust growing so deep in her belly spreading out to her limbs and her heart. She could feel tears forming in her eyes, from the overwhelming emotions of that situation, passionate love making, regretful pain, trying to be as close as possible to the love… of her life. _Did she actually just think that? Oh, Jo, you really are hopeless._

Alex let go of her hands, which automatically snapped down to hold Alex head which was now roaming near her bellybutton and kissing her deeply, longingly, going farther down, making her buck, feeling her wetness, readiness for him, kissing her entrance.

"Alex, please," Jo could hardly get out between sighing and moaning. For once he reacted to her and came back up kissing her full on the mouth, one hand cupping her left breast, one hand testing her wetness with two fingers inside of her and giving his penis an entry. He propped up on his elbows besides her face and thrust his pulsating erection inside her which made them both see stars twinkling on a black horizon. Jo pulled him down in another mind blowing kiss, saying everything she needed to tell him, and Alex started pumping in and out of her as if hanging on to dear life. Jo intertwined her feet on his back not being able to keep in her screams and moans. They fooled around a little before Jo readied herself to finish. "Oh God, baby, please-," she muttered but it was already too much, she couldn't take anymore. The walls inside her started convulsing, cramping around the already sperm spitting penis, she let out a whimper, throwing back her head, feeling Alex kiss her neck and shoulder, still pumping in and out of her, prolonging their mutual pleasure that has not yet ceased to build and explode. Alex slumped down on top of her chest, making her hug him tightly and her tears started falling uncontrollably even though she tried so hard to keep them in. _Really? Crying after sex? Jo!_ Their breathing was still out of bounds and their hearts were racing, and Jo dearly hoped he wouldn't realize she was crying like a baby. After a short while of coming down from their high together, Alex slowly pulled away which made her cringe.

"Alex, please-", she hugged him tightly, not able to let him go. "Please, I can't lose you over this," she sobbed. He looked up at her tired, passionately grieving face in concern, still showing a hint of anger and feeling completely worn out. He hesitated a second before he came up to rest at her eye level and hugged her tightly to him, throwing the covers on top of them, letting her get comfort in his embrace, slowly and rhythmically painting circles on her back.

"I love you so much, Alex, please believe me," Jo whispered softly after calming herself down a bit. She pulled back to look at his face which was still seriously mad. Again, he kissed her feverishly on the mouth, not even trying to form the words that she needed to hear. But she was okay with that. She was still learning, but she was on her way to speaking Alex. She knew he was mad and angry and disappointed and hurt. But she also knew he needed her just as much as she needed him and even though their love was new and vulnerable, they seemed to share a bond that wasn't as breakable, as she had feared it to be. The two fell asleep both their arms wrapped around each other, intertwined with the covers thrown over them, blissfully sleeping off the exhaustion of their passionate lovemaking.

It was still dark and they were both still wrapped up in each other's body parts underneath a huge pile of blankets, when with a loud bang the bedroom door fell open and the bright hallway lights let them both squint their eyes in confusion.

"As adorable as I find this situation, hairball and Cheesy Spawn all cozy together after a night of screaming at each other and hot make up sex," Cristina started out way too loud and painfully cruel. "Wilson, you are on my service today and you are not going to be late!" Jo closed her eyes in horror over the thought of having to spend a whole day with Yang who seemed to sport an extra special awful mood this morning.

"Get the hell out, Cristina," Alex snarled, burying himself deeper into Jo's neck. Cristina just shared a cruel little laugh, hands on her hips, waiting for the young doctor to move.

"What time is it?" Jo asked groggily, uncomfortable about her boss standing in the doorway while she was lying in an embrace with her boyfriend, naked, even with the blankets on and nothing showing actively.

"I thought you'd never ask," Cristina responded ecstatically. "It is a quarter to four! I am going out for a run and once I'm back and showered, you are supposed to be ready to go, you hear me?" Jo groaned loudly, while Alex took matters in his own hands and threw one of the headboard cushions after his roommate.

"I said GET OUT!" Cristina laughed and banged the door closed. Jo turned back into the embrace of her boyfriend and tried to get back to comfortable and blissful sleep.

"She can't be serious, right?" she mumbled, half dozing off already. "I mean, it's quarter to four, I have got hours before I need to be up for rounds with her, right?" Alex just nodded unconsciously while already fast asleep, petting his girlfriend's head softly.


	6. 10x07

They stood, silence and darkness engulfing them, staring at each other. Even though Alex had just let her in, Jo was still hesitant how to go on from this. She reached out her hand timidly and grabbed onto the front part of Alex' sweater, inching closer slowly, watching his face throughout to anticipate a dismissive reaction immediately. She smiled slightly at him, even though she didn't really feel like smiling, just to break the ice. Alex sighed, moving towards her when all of a sudden the doorbell rang again and they both startled from their position having decided to kiss a moment ago, facing over towards the door and seeing a bunch of kids accumulating in front of it. Jo felt a chuckle rise in her chest and couldn't help but let it out whereas Alex groaned and rubbed his eyes, obviously pissed by the kids finally getting to him.

"Give it," Jo spoke softly, clasping the bowl from him and moving to open the door, switching the lights on again.

"No, they won't stop coming," Alex yelped immediately, making her snort, but focus on the youngsters right the next moment.

"Oh, _wow, _who do we have here? Are you a scary vampire?" Jo sweet talked the kid before bending down to offer him some candy.

"Look, mommy, it's a fairy," another sweet little girl looking like she was wearing a full body mask of a lion ran towards them excitedly, stretching out her hand for the bowl. Jo smiled for the kid's excitement and innocence.

"And who are you, mister?" Jo turned towards a little boy that was hiding behind the vampire, stretching her neck to get a glimpse of him. Alex frowned when she jumped back a foot suddenly and held on tightly to Alex. "Oh, no, you need to save me," she squealed theatrically, making the kids laugh and the little boy emerge from his hiding spot. Alex just groaned. "It's Captain Hook! He's going to fairynap me," she said in a girlish whisper. The little pirate got out his little make-believe sword and pointed it towards Alex, tugging on Jo's dress. For the kid's sake, Jo stepped over, acting like the pirate had actually caught her. Alex gave him big eyes when he didn't say anything.

"You have to say _what's your price?_" the vampire told him in a whiny voice.

"Oh, you can have her," Alex waved him away in irritation. Jo rolled her eyes.

"And what he means by that is, take the whole bowl, she's worth more than just caaandy," she laughed softly and chirped out in a high voice, making the kids go nuts, trying to divide the contents of the bowl in between them.

"You're awesome! You can have her back," the pirate immediately shoved Jo inside the house, making her eyes widen when tumbling against Alex's chest.

"Well, I feel so special right now between you and this guy," she pointed her thumb back at the kid, making Alex snort again. They watched as the kids fought over the last pieces of candy before taking the bowl back and screaming their thanks while already running off to the next house, making Alex sigh in relief and Jo close the door and switching off the lights, following him into the living room.

"You didn't have to give them the entire bowl, you know?" he grunted back at her, sitting down at the center of the couch.

"I just made sure you had a good excuse for not answering anymore doorbells," Jo pointed out, sitting down next to him, putting her hand on his thigh.

"You just made sure I have lots of frantic parents in the ER tomorrow, complaining about their kids' tummy aches," he said, watching the movie intently. Jo sighed deeply, not biting the bait.

"What are you watching?" she asked him tentatively.

"Some Halloween movie," he gave her back, making her roll her eyes and smile at him, bored with his behavior.

"Do you wanna do something else?" she asked, turning towards him, slinging her legs across his and cuddling into his side. Against all expectations, Alex moved the arm he had rested on the backrest of the couch a moment ago down to hug her back.

"I guess we should wait for the party to be over," he spoke slowly, scrunching up his face at something on the movie.

"What party?"

"They set up a little Halloween party for the kids here…," Alex sighed. "Grey and Shepherd don't have any neighbors to trick or treat to and Arizona and Callie… or I guess Arizona? Whatever, they'd only meet drunken students passing out tequila shots to the trick or treaters in their neighborhood, so yeah… they invited daycare people and had a party here… and are now out trick or treating and I'm on candy duty," he explained, making her smile against his neck.

"You should have dressed up, you grump," she murmured, kissing his skin.

"I think taking off one costume between the two of us is enough work for tonight," Alex responded lazily, ending it with a smirk when he saw her glancing at him cheekily.

"M-hm," she said smiling, taking this as the cue to be allowed to move in. She cupped his cheek forcefully and turned his face around to kiss him deeply, only parting to breathe in between, having needed this sentiment for a while now.

"I didn't know Tinkerbelle was so… ehem… forward," he murmured against her lips, making her chuckle. They stayed like this for a bit, Jo holding onto his head tightly, running her thumb across his cheek.

"I really am sorry," she breathed against him. After a moment she felt him nod and she smiled hesitantly, pecking his lip once more.

"Where did you play dress up at?" Alex pulled away from her and leaned back on the couch, not having removed his second arm from her waist though.

"Don't you wanna talk about it?" she asked him, ignoring his previous question.

"Do we have to?" he asked her back, actually looking at her. She shrugged.

"We probably should," Jo told him in a low whisper, looking down, making him squeeze her waist.

"Do we have to _right now_?" he questioned her further, realizing that she was being nervous.

"I guess not," she concluded, still looking down.

"Good," he said, guiding her chin up to look at him. "Cause I ate way too much candy after having three scary looking cupcakes and I don't feel too well. Do you wanna take care of me while I'm sitting here, lazily, watching the movie, unable to move?" he asked her with a slightly teasing tone. Jo shot him back a mocking look.

"What do you want?" she asked him slowly, her tone of voice already anticipating nonsense.

"Glad you asked, I could really use a beer right now. Feel free to get one for yourself as well," he told her happily, nodding at her enthusiastically. Jo snorted, shaking her head and reaching over to slap the back of his head.

"Where are those cupcakes you were talking about? I'm gonna indulge in one of those until you have decided to take care of _me_ tonight," Jo got up slowly, showing off all her goodies for him and throwing him a seductive glance over her shoulder, playing all shy and innocent, making him smirk and nod.

"That's what I'm talking about," he said, watching her go and grab the stuff before returning and thrusting a bottle of beer in his hand and biting into the cupcake, closing her eyes and indulging in the sugar bomb.

"Mmmhm, this is soooo delicious," she raved on theatrically, swaying from side to side as if she was feeling dizzy from the pleasure of eating a cupcake. Alex watched her do so for the remainder of her cupcake, having raised an eyebrow at her, dubbing her crazy. "What? What are you looking at?" she asked when she opened up her eyes again, trying to clean her face from all the frosting.

"Let me help you with that," Alex gave her a burning look before reaching over and kissing her deeply, falling down on the couch together and starting to make out heavily, completely blanking out everything around them, their desire for each other having taken over instantly. Jo's hands found their way up into his hair, pulling him closer and she wriggled slightly to make space for him between her legs.

"You know I'm not sure Tinkerbell should cheat on Peter Pan…." she murmured against him, sighing when she felt his hand slide down her thigh and cup her bottom slowly.

"Do you really wanna bring up fairy tales right now?" Alex rasped against her wildly, kissing her cleavage, Jo bucking her hips at him when his thumb wrestled with the seams of her panties and touched her tenderness softly.

"My point was _let's take this freaking costume off_," she widened her eyes at him with a smile and shook his head at his oblivion. Alex smiled, putting some more pressure underneath his thumb, capturing a moan from her lips.

"I can help you with that," he hissed at her lustfully, pulling her already very tiny dress down an inch to tease the edges of her boobs with his mouth, leaving sloppy kisses on her chest.

"I really don't wanna stop this but you know… I don't really feel like getting caught by my bosses and their babies doing _this_," Jo half breathed, half moaned, trying to prop up on her elbows. Alex smirked up at her face, making her look back at him madly. "I'm serious," she said, reaching over and slapping the back of his head again.

"Yeah," Alex said, grinning smugly, "me too," he wriggled his eyebrows at her when he moved his fingers upwards and encircled her clit, making her throw her head back and groan.

"I hate you," he could hear her curse through gritted teeth, making him chuckle. "Come on," she whined. "Let's just go upstairs," she said, making him sigh and remove his fingers, sitting up, leaving her feel cold and exposed. "Ugh, you really know how to make a girl feel special," she hissed at him, sitting up as well, readjusting her costume and leaning in.

"You wanted to stop," he pointed out to her soberly. Jo maddened quickly.

"Alex, if we wanna make this work, you need to stop being such a jerkface and listen to the things I actually say and say the things you actually mean. We'll never make it through the first few months if you keep pushing me away and treating me like I'm actually not your girlfriend," she shot out, making him stare at her completely taken aback. They sized each other up for a moment before he shot out his hand to take hers.

"We're still joking, right?" he asked her, tentatively, making her sigh.

"Some things are better not to be joked about, Alex," she told him, looking at him in pain.

"Alright, sorry," he told her, and this time it really sounded genuine. She nodded before he reached out for her. "Come here," he made her cuddle close again and kissed her head.

"I'm sorry for being a crappy boyfriend," he told her, wrapping his arms around her tightly.

"Thank you for letting me in tonight," she whispered against his neck, making him look down at her again, in surprise.

"You really thought I wasn't going to let you in?" Jo just shrugged.

"You ignored me for weeks. You wouldn't even talk to me unless I consulted you on a case. I wasn't sure we were even still a thing," she told him quietly. Alex sighed.

"I _am _a pretty crappy boyfriend," he said, pulling her closer. "And you are pretty amazing, you know that?" he looked down at her, matching eyes.

"Well… how amazing do you think I feel about being hopelessly in love with my crappy, crappy boyfriend?" she sighed, holding the gaze. Alex raised his eyebrows.

"Is it even still worth it? For you I mean?" he asked her tentatively.

"Every minute of _this_, yes," she gave him back without hesitancy before she moved in to kiss, and this time, they would not let anything get in between them anymore.


	7. 10x08

[10x08]

"Hey," Alex bustled into the nurses' station, running his fingers over Jo's back in passing, bending down to the computer to look something up.

"Hey," Jo smiled down towards him, not having seen him until then. "Haven't seen you all day," she said, taking in her boyfriend's demeanor. "What's up?"

"Ugh, not much. Crazy day," he just replied, hitting the print button. "You?"

"Same here," Jo gave him back, looking down at her tablet. Alex retrieved the print outs from underneath the table before sitting on the edge and looking at her.

"Wanna tell?" he asked her, trying to make out her mood as well.

"There's nothing much to tell, really," Jo looked up at him, putting the tablet down and leaning towards him on her folded elbows. "Day started out weird with the presentation of the 3D printer," she recounted. Alex chuckled.

"Yeah, I heard about the fork," he said, making her smile.

"M-hm. And then I was on Bailey's service today and she was all weird, seriously. She made me re-scrub and I hadn't even touched the patient yet. And after that she just yanked the instruments right out of my hands and wanted to do it herself, cause she for some reason changed her mind about teaching me, and seconds later we had spillage and she didn't even realize," Jo narrated, making him frown.

"That sounds… odd," he gave her.

"Yeah, and it doesn't stop there. She'd zone out completely every now and then and wouldn't react to us talking. When we were done with the gut, we checked for leakage but she wouldn't trust the test so she made Warren do another bubble test," she said. "And trust me, I know Bailey, she can be pretty rough. She doesn't mince the words, she gets right out there, but seriously, the way she was talking to me today… I felt so stupid," Jo ranted.

"Well, sounds like she just had a bad day," Alex tried to comfort her.

"I don't know, Alex… something's up with that. But I can't put my finger on it. Dr. Warren was all weird, too. I totally understand if he wants to stay in her good graces… you know with being married to her and all… but I'd think he'd have different priorities in the OR," she pointed out, more talking to herself now than to Alex. She looked up finally when she didn't get a reply. "Sorry," she closed her eyes for a moment and shook her head. "I guess I needed a vent," she mirrored Alex's facials when he smiled and put her hand on his arm that had just wrapped around her waist. "How did your surgery go? You were in there for hours," Jo inquired interestedly. Alex groaned.

"Don't get me started. Meredith was all shaken up about the fork thing too it seems so she went all _let's do freaking world rocking medicine _whereas she had no business meddling with my patient's liver. We did good on the other eleven tumors but that one was nasty. Deep down in the liver, there was no way she was gonna be able to resect it. I guess the whole 3D printing got to her… and something's up with her and Cristina… they had a pretty nasty showdown after we talked to our patient. I guess everything's getting to her right now… but seriously, don't take it out on my patient," he let off some steam he had been cooking up inside him. Jo looked at him sympathetically.

"Steph said something about having to make her stop… we never spoke further, she was paged to the ER but that sounded pretty bad," she nodded, Alex joining in.

"Yeah, I haven't seen something like that in a while, I gotta say..," he agreed.

"Well," Jo looked up at him, a smile tugging on her lips. "But you weren't very nice either," she pointed out.

"What? Why?" Alex frowned at her.

"Putting Steph on the spot like that? She's a resident! She's Grey's resident! That was kind of mean, you know…," she chided him lightly, making him roll his eyes.

"If she wants to stay in the surgery business, she'll need to buck up. If you're hands on, you're hands on. You'll need to learn to make medical decisions for yourself and act on them. It is what it is. She and Mer will be fine. Mer will calm down and Edwards will be back on her service in no time. I, on the other hand, have to think about a treatment plan for my patient now," he said, sighing dramatically and waving the printed sheets at her, making her nod. Alex got up and rounded the counter. "You coming?"

"Mmm… I think I'll stay actually," she informed him, looking at him for approval. Alex hiked his eyebrows questioningly. "I don't know…. It's Bailey's patient… I'm _so _sure that there was absolutely no leakage… and I did think she behaved really weird today… I just… I'd rather monitor him for a while than question my superior's judgment," she argued. Alex nodded.

"Well, sounds halfway reasonable to me," he smiled at her. "Are you gonna come home later or are you staying overnight?"

"Um, haven't thought about it yet?" Jo retorted questioningly herself.

"I can go see if I can catch a ride home with Yang, you can take the car if you want," he suggested, making her smile and pull him closer towards her by a single finger she could catch from afar.

"You are such a sweetie sometimes, you know that?" she asked him before wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him in for a short kiss.

"Stop calling me that," he snapped back before pecking her lips once more. Jo just laughed.

"Well, I gotta stick to the truth, you know," she shook her head at him mockingly.

"M-hm," he purred against her lips. "You know, I'd rather have you home with me than knowing you're spending all night in a dark, empty, boring on-call room, tossing and turning, thinking of me…," he muttered. Jo chuckled.

"Well, it really depends on what will await me once I do get home," she told him matter-of-factly. "If you're gonna research for your patient all night, I'd rather stay here… _however,_" she stressed that last part. "I could think of an infinite array of options we could engage in instead of poring over pages and pages of blah," she nuzzled his nose with hers and smiled when his lips touched hers again.

"Are you actually asking me if I _want _to engage?" Alex looked at her wide-eyed.

"Ugh, guys, disgusting, get a room," Stephanie walked up towards them, sporting an extra awful face. Jo chuckled awkwardly before entangling herself from her boyfriend, looking back at her friend.

"Alright, I guess that's my cue," Alex said, deducing from Stephanie's face that he wasn't her most favorite person at the moment. He squeezed Jo's waist before letting go and walking away. "See you later," he murmured towards her, making her wink and smile.

"I hate that you're dating an attending," Stephanie ranted. "_That _attending to be clearer."

"Well, um, right back atcha?" Jo told her, having raised one eyebrow, watching as Steph put her head down on the counter and groaned loudly.

"Why does everything have to be so complicated?" she whined, probably talking about being put on the spot in the OR that day and having to pay for that now regarding working on Dr. Grey's service. Jo's thoughts trailed off and she turned her head over to watch Alex walk off the station, smiling at the thought of their relationship. _Some things on some days really weren't._


	8. 10x09

[10x09]

* * *

><p><em>This one's actually to be fit before or during 10x09. Just to keep it clear.<em>

* * *

><p>Alex grumbled as he woke up, his head buried in his pillow and buzzing from still heavy sleep. He scrunched up his shoulders and wriggled around to mobilize from his rigid sleeping position. When he blinked his eyes, he made out the piercing red numbers on the display of his alarm clock, telling him it was 6.14 a.m. <em>What day was it? <em>He frowned and closed his eyes again, slowly trying to fight his daze and rolled over to feel for Jo. The bed was empty. At the same time, he heard the soft tunes of the radio wafting out from the bathroom and frantic movements somewhere in the room. Alex opened up his eyes again and propped himself up on his elbows to find out what was going on. _Whoa! What the hell had happened to his bedroom? _He narrowed his eyes, observing the chaotic state of the room, bunches of garments lying and hanging around all over the place, shoes accumulating at the door and Jo just entering the bedroom from the direction of the bathroom, looking all flustered but focused on something so she hadn't realized he was up yet. When Alex let his gaze roam her, he realized for the first time the pleasant smell of Jo probably just coming out of the shower, her hair clipped up in a messy do while wearing a silk robe, covering up her goods. He groaned again, letting himself fall back down and yawning.

"What happened in here?" he rasped out, startling her. Jo just threw him a mad glare before turning back towards the cupboard.

"I'm trying to pick something to wear," she snapped back, sounding nervous.

"Yeah, no kidding," he replied, lazily, rolling his eyes. He watched her fuss for a moment, before they both heard a knock on their door and watched Yang enter cautiously.

"Whoa, what the hell happened in here?" she flitted her eyes across the room, before finally laying eyes on Alex.

"Aren't you going to work?" she questioned him in surprise.

"No," he gave her back, motioning towards Jo. "I have a train wreck to monitor," he chuckled slightly, making her nod.

"Alright, just wanted to ask if you needed a ride," Cristina told him, already closing the door again.

"I don't need supervision," Jo barked at him, sounding irritated.

"Um, yes you do," Alex hiked his eyebrows, trying not to break out in laughter.

"Ugh, just… shut up," she gave him back, seemingly not being able to shape something sensible to say.

"Would you calm down? It's 6.15, you have hours until the court meeting," he pointed out to her.

"What? It's already 6.15?! Oh my God, I'm totally behind," she immediately blew up again, running inside the bathroom and clanking around with something he couldn't see. When she came back out, she got some tights out of the dresser and sighed.

"How about you come here for a second and let me calm you down?" Alex told her, having adopted a teasing tone in his voice about her freaking out.

"I don't have time for nonsense," she told him in a sharp voice, sitting down at the end of the bed, starting to put her tights on. Alex sighed, looking at her back for a moment before pushing himself up and crawling over to where she was, sitting down behind her and putting his hands on her shoulders, massaging her for a moment.

"Alex," she told him with a sigh, exasperated.

"I said calm down," he just gave her back, smoothing his hands across her shoulders and down her upper arms before slinging his arms around her waist and putting his head on her shoulder, kissing her neck.

"I can't," she spat, and from what he could tell from the side of her face, she was close to breaking point.

"Why are you so nervous?"

"You don't think I have a reason to be nervous?" she turned her face towards him, yanking her head back an inch in surprise when she realized how close their faces were.

"I think you are very well prepared," he responded, drawing soothing circles with his thumbs, enjoying the feeling of her silky robe. Jo grunted.

"As if that'd help me present myself better," she said, cranky, pulling at her tights a little too fast and ripping them, groaning. Alex chuckled, kissing her shoulder. "You think that's funny?" she snubbed.

"I think you're adorable," he told her playfully, tightening his grip on her when she tried to get up.

"Alex," she whined. "Let me go!"

"Nope," he told her matter-of-factly. "You will need to calm down before I let you go," he decided.

"Well, that's not gonna happen," she shook her head at him frantically, however, closing her eyes eventually and leaning back onto his broad frame when realizing he actually wouldn't let her go.

"That's better," Alex whispered into her ear, bringing up his right arm to caress her cheek.

"I'm just so scared," she let go of her cares for a minute. "What if I say something wrong? What if I get Torres into more trouble than she already is?"

"You won't," Alex hushed her slightly. "Look, people sue us all the time… usually they really don't have a case. Mostly they do it just because they're grieving or angry. People don't usually think about what the doctor's job is… so they don't realize that most of the times… they don't even have a case. Callie did all she could. So did you. He would have died if she hadn't done the amputations. That's all the jury will need to hear. Of course, their attorney will make a good case, probably based on trying to raise sympathy… because really… that's all it is… a snowboarder having lost his legs… so, yes, they will all try to raise sympathy and point out how sad and devastating it is for him… but really, they don't have a case. Just trust me, alright? You'll be just fine," he murmured into her ear, trying to make sense for her.

"I don't know. At the meeting, Callie's attorney forced his entire game plan down our throats and it just sounded… it just sounded so much like if you say one wrong word, we're screwed," she explained.

"Well, it's the attorney's job to make sure that their respective clients win their cases. As it is the doctor's job to save lives. Don't let him scare you. He's a lawyer, he doesn't understand anything we do at the hospital, either," Alex gave her back.

"But what if I do say something that will make the jury think otherwise?"

"Well, just stick to the plan. Answer his questions, don't add anything that he didn't explicitly ask for. If you add stuff, he'll lose his own concept as well, and he'll start to grill you, he'll start to ask irrational questions because he's improvising as well. If you stick to the plan, he can anticipate your replies. Give detail, but not too much, the jury won't understand. The less they know, the easier it will be for them to see that it was important to amputate his legs to save his life. The more medical detail you give, the more confused they'll be, and the more they'll think… well, maybe the guy is right, maybe if all that sounds so confusing, the doctors were overwhelmed and unqualified too. Just don't let that happen," Alex continued.

"Well, but I _am_ unqualified….," Jo objected. Alex sighed.

"No, you're not. You're in training, that doesn't mean you're unqualified. Also, Callie was the lead surgeon," he responded.

"Yeah, but they're asking my medical opinion," she retorted.

"Well, yes, and you have one of those, right?"

"Alex," she whined again.

"Look, if you pull the _I'm a second year resident _card right from the beginning, they will conclude that the staff in the OR had no business being there. If you just give your opinion, as you are asked, as you have one, it'll be fine, I promise," he sighed into her ear, before kissing her temple, making her close her eyes. Slowly he wrestled with the silk cloth of her robe on her waist and snuck his hand underneath, indulging in her soft skin underneath, running his hand across her abdomen before dropping it a little lower, teasing her slowly.

"I don't have time for his, Alex," Jo purred, her eyes still closed.

"Let's make time for it. You need to relax," he told her, boldly sticking his fingers into her underwear and putting some pressure on her tender skin.

"Alex, please," she sighed, putting a hand of hers on his. "I'm serious, this will not make me relax later," she pointed out.

"What? Of course it will make you relax, what are you talking about?" Jo rolled her eyes and firmly pushed Alex's hand out of her lingerie and turning to face him.

"It will make me feel good for about twenty minutes, keeping in mind that _I don't have time to waste_ and then I will be all afterglowy and confused and I will freak out even more because one I have wasted time and two I don't have a sharp mind anymore," she smiled at him, cupping his cheek. "We'll have time for it later, alright?" Alex rolled his eyes, pulling her close.

"I didn't mean to say I wanna have sex by all means because I'm so needy, I wanted to make you feel better," he told her, a little hurt by her rejection.

"I know, baby," Jo still smiled, wrapping her arms around him now, "And I appreciate that, I do," she said, and he could hear her gratitude in her voice. "I just think it's not the best idea right now, alright?" she waited for a reaction that wasn't coming on. "Which doesn't mean I don't want to, yes?" she told him with wide eyes and a smile.

"I know," Alex grumbled, hugging her to him. "You'll do perfect, I know it. And I'll be there the whole time," he reassured her.

"You didn't have to take the day off, you know," she purred in his embrace.

"Hunt gave me the day off, I didn't actually ask for it," Alex replied.

"Oh," Jo chuckled, pulling back. "Well, anyways, I'm glad you're here," she told him, making him nod. They leaned in and kissed gently, before Jo pulled back and got up rapidly, freaking out again. "What do you think about that suit? Too casual?" she seemed to be comparing two different costumes, whereas they looked the exact same to him. Both had skirts, both had blazers, both were dark. Alex sighed dramatically and let himself fall back on the bed again, rubbing his face in exasperation. _He would be so glad once this whole thing was over with. _


	9. 10x10

[10x10]

"Karev, you want another beer?" Hunt called across the living room to where he had sat himself on the couch and tried to digest the huge Thanksgiving dinner he had indulged in. He looked down at his cell phone and then sighed.

"Uh, yeah, thanks," he responded lazily after a moment. It wasn't ten minutes after that his cell phone buzzed. When he saw who was calling, he felt like a high schooler finally getting out of his parents' social engagements. He chuckled quietly at the phone before picking up.

"_Booty call," _Alex heard Jo's attempt of trying to sound seductive on the other end of the phone, smirking.

"You done yet?" he asked her back.

"_Hm, yeah, we just finished up eating and I think it's not gonna be much longer. Webber is going overboard with all his freaking century old stories_," she whispered that last part, laughing softly. "_What about you_?"

"Let me finish my beer before I come get you. Meet me at the parking lot in like… thirty?"

"_Can't wait,_" he heard her say before ending the call and looking up, meeting a smug looking Meredith, having seated herself on the coffee table opposite of him, smiling.

"What?" he inquired, dismissively.

"You got somewhere to be?" his friend wriggled her eyebrows at him. Alex rolled his eyes and took a sip of his bottle.

"Old men in hospital beds don't usually stay up until after nine," he responded soberly.

"M-hm," Meredith nodded knowingly, still smiling.

"What?" his voice sounded more irritated now.

"Nothing," she just shrugged nonchalantly. They sat in silence for a while, listening in to the other conversations. "So, have you managed to overcome your… rough patch?" he heard her whisper after a while. He just gave her a frown, not knowing what she was talking about. "You know… you were all grumpy and mad… intern Alex, really, a few weeks ago… have you guys… worked it out?"

"What makes you think it had anything to do with Jo?" he barked back at her gruffly.

"Well, I don't know… what else could it have been?" she gave him back, genuinely concerned now. Alex shook his head while drinking up and put his bottle down.

"Nothing you have to concern yourself with," he got up, winking at her and said his thanks and goodbyes before getting in the car and driving over to their meeting spot. When he arrived, Jo was already waiting and got into the car swiftly, shivering it seemed.

"It's not _that _cold," he pointed out to her, when he started driving again.

"I've been waiting for ten minutes or so," she gave him back, throwing him a look.

"Sorry, they live in the mountains," Alex defended himself. "How's Webber doing?"

"He's good. We had a fun night," Jo looked over towards him, watching him drive. "How was your night?"

"Ugh, fine. Same old, same old," he ranted quietly, making her giggle. Alex drove into the driveway of his house and killed the engine, staying in his seat.

"I thought we were going to have take out chicken?!" Jo glanced over at him playfully, pointing out the obvious.

"Oh please, stop talking about food," he retorted, reaching back to retrieve something from the backseat.

"What's that?" she asked him curiously.

"_I…,_" Alex told her dramatically, shoving a plastic fork into her hand, surprising her with his actions. "Brought dessert," he opened up the carton and presented her with a piece of left-over pecan pie Emma had packed for him.

"Ughh, awesome!" Jo squealed, making him grin.

"Well, it's no chicken, but we can still eat it in the car," Alex shrugged, making her smile and shine her eyes at him now.

"You're so sweet sometimes, you know that?" she gave him a look for a moment that she knew he hated as well as being called sweet, before stabbing her fork into the pie and mouthing that first piece. "Oh, God, that's really good," she munched on the piece, not even waiting to have swallowed. "You should try it," she said, cutting another piece and holding it in front of his mouth teasingly.

"I had way enough," he told her, his eyebrows hiking.

"Oh come on," she told him. "You're gonna watch me eat and then you're gonna wanna have a bite when there's like next to nothing left and you know I hate that. I hate sharing the last bite," she reminded him. Alex snorted, motioning for her to give him the bite. As he munched on it, Jo leaned over and pecked his cheek. "Thanks for this, this is awesome," she said, making him nod in mock boredom.

"So, what did you guys do other than eat and listen to Webber rant about surgical techniques in 1932 or something?" Jo chuckled as she had another bite, shifting slightly to sit facing him, Alex immediately reaching out and placing his hand in her lap.

"We gave thanks," she told him wide eyed and nodding, as if to remind him of what this holiday was all about. Alex immediately rolled his eyes. "Didn't you give thanks?"

"Well, they tried to make us but seriously… it's ridiculous… everybody holding hands and saying personalized thanks. They did a universally applicable thank you when they saw that nobody really was into that crap," he told her without much passion.

"Don't tell me you don't have anything to give thanks about," Jo asked him in a teasing tone, shaking her head at him, trying to stay serious. Alex snorted.

"Well, what did you give thanks for?"

"Well, I gave thanks for… having a _spot_ on an awesome surgical _program_ here in _Seattle_… where I met _you_, who amongst many other things gives me _shelter_," Jo giggled. "Surviving the storm while others didn't… having great teachers show me stuff…it was a bit… you know… heavy on the dramatic side," she pointed out, making him nod and squeeze her thigh.

"Well, you did have a lot to be thankful for, now that I think of it," Alex tried to diffuse tension, joking around, listing them on his fingers. "Me, the house – that's mine, the spot on the program, you surviving the storm – which really only comes back to the fact that you were with _me _all night," he laughed when Jo slapped him playfully, joining in.

"Mhm, I really do," she agreed, enjoying the caramel that she tried not to have stuck to her teeth later. "Would think it's the same with you, really, but you know… to each his own," she shook her head in mock disappointment.

"Are you really all into that giving thanks crap and stuff?" Alex asked her genuinely now, having watched her think so hard about it.

"Hm, nah, I don't know. I don't really have an opinion on it," she answered dutifully, offering him another bite but he declined. He raised his eyebrows when she chuckled suddenly, awaiting her to speak up. "I always have to think about Mrs. Schmitt at Thanksgiving," she recounted, making him listen closely. "I once brought her a store-bought pie before the holiday, thanking her for you know… being kind about everything…letting me use the showers… helping me out with food sometimes… you know when they'd cook in home ec class every now and again…she'd always save some for me…whatever really…and most of all….for not telling on me… anyways, I thought it needed some gratitude, so I gave her a pie… I totally would have baked one but you know… I didn't have the space for an oven in my car," she told him mockingly, looking over for the first time, seeing his expression on his face. "What?" she asked him, taken aback now.

"Nothing, nothing, go on," he shook his head quickly, not wanting to interrupt.

"Well, that's the end of the story. She cried because I told her how grateful I was for what she continuously had done for me… so that makes me think about her every year at this holiday," she ended her narrations.

"Well, she was probably confronted with the usual teenager more than not, the ones who live in mansions and get their favorite meals cooked by an employee of the family, not once having expressed gratitude towards anyone," he pointed out, making her nod.

"Yeah, probably," Jo agreed. They sat in silence for a while, Alex watching Jo eat the last of it. "This was a huge piece," she laughed when she had crammed everything inside her mouth and could barely chew.

"Yeah, I think Owen's chick actually gave me some to share for two people," he chuckled. There was another moment of quiet, Alex running his thumb across her thigh where he had rested his hand a while ago, trying to shape some words. "You know, you've never really talked to me about when you were a kid other than how they left you at a fire station and about Mrs. Schmitt," he told her quietly, not knowing how she'd react. Jo stared down at the cardboard box, picking up random crumbs with her finger and putting them into her mouth.

"Well, there really isn't much to tell," she said after a moment. "That's about the gist of it," she said, looking up at him and smiling, but he could see it was fake.

"Okay," he breathed out, not wanting to push it. "If there's ever anything else you might remember… I know I might not have made that clear…but sometimes I'm actually pretty good at listening," Alex smiled at her tentatively. Jo leaned her head back onto the headrest and smiled back at him, extending her arm to caress his abdomen.

"Thank you," she whispered. They looked at each other before they slowly moved in and kissed shortly, but in a very sweet gesture. "And I did mean what I said before about what I'm thankful for, just wanted to let you know," she murmured against his lips, making him nod.

"I didn't mean anything from what I said before, having nothing to be thankful about," he gave her back, making her smile and nod. They kissed again before packing up all their stuff and moving their holiday celebration inside.


	10. 10x11

[10x11]

Alex slowly approached Jo who had fallen asleep in the visitor's chair next to the still hallucinating but fortunately sleeping Jimmy. He bit his lip, hesitant about waking her. He didn't really know what to tell her. He didn't know if he was glad she was treating and helping his estranged father whereas Alex couldn't get himself to give his dad another chance. He wasn't sure if he was able to face her at all, now that she knew way too much about Alex's childhood. Much more than he had ever planned on telling anyone. But then again, this was Jo. And Jo had been surprising him so many times since they knew each other, and also since they'd been together officially. Jo seemed to genuinely want to deal with stuff like that. She wanted him to deal with stuff that was bothering him and she had continuously told him that she would be by his side. Or at least, that's how he interpreted it.

Alex sighed, watching her sleep peacefully. She was so beautiful. So beautiful, inside and out. He had never thought he'd get that ever again. Or ever at all. He wasn't sure which one. He had had successful relationships before, if you cut out the ends respectfully. But he had never felt like that. He had met so many people over the years that he had learned to love over time, that he had learned to open up to, however, he couldn't remember ever having anyone, except for Meredith but that relationship had always been platonic, that he actually opened up to as much as he found himself doing with Jo. The other relationships he'd had weren't centered around that. Like, they were good and he had been with girls that he enjoyed being with and wanted to be with and even considered to conquer life with, but his past, his demons, all his issues, they never were part of those relationships. This was so different with Jo, Jo wanted him to deal with everything and she wanted to be part of it. She didn't close her eyes to his issues, and most importantly, she didn't seem to be a runner even if he showed her very unpleasant streaks of his. She didn't tell him to change, she just told him to deal with it because she saw something in him apparently… something that she loved so dearly that she wasn't even thinking of it being too much for her. He actually owed her a whole lot. She definitely earned to be treated well, to be loved unconditionally. That wasn't a problem, though, that had happened already for him. He had fallen so badly for that girl, he didn't know where to even put it anymore. Yes, she annoyed him so much at times, and she was way too close and she was way too nosy. But he couldn't do it without her, either. He loved her. And she deserved to be treated special. They had known each other such a short time but she was the biggest part of his life, the most important one.

Alex knelt down besides her and grazed her thighs before resting his hand on her waist, leaning down and kissing her upper arm gently, waiting for her to wake up. Jimmy was still restlessly talking in his sleep but other than that, the patients' ward was completely quiet. Jo blinked her eyelids in confusion, waking up slowly. She gulped and wet her lips before realizing, she had woken due to Alex's advances. She gave him a tiny smile, before yawning widely.

"Hey," he smiled at her, approaching slowly, since she still seemed dazed.

"Hi," she gave him back, running her own hand up his arm that was holding her and placed it on his shoulder. She looked over at Jimmy, assessing his state, sighing.

"He's reliving some more scenes from my childhood," Alex told her quietly, "let's just let him sleep it off," he managed to suggest reasonably. Jo nodded with an apologetic frown.

"I'm sorry about today," she whispered, not knowing what to say explicitly.

"What would you be sorry about? He hurt _you_, stop apologizing," he told her off roughly, but tried to soften his attitude a bit. He knew she was unsure of how to deal with this whole mess as well, especially because he had been so abrasive about it before.

"I just… I told you I'd handle it and I didn't," she pointed out.

"Oh, come on, stop it. He was having a complete freak out. You couldn't have dealt with him. I had to start wrestling to learn how to defend myself and silence him over a stretch of time," he gave her back with wide eyes. There was a short pause in between them in which they both just stared at each other. Then, Jo shook her head slowly.

"I didn't mean to butt in again. He made the nurse page me upon coming in and said something about I said I'd help him if he got clean. I wanted to turn him down but then he crashed. Later I asked Hunt if we could transfer him but he wouldn't let me, and he made me be on his case. I'm sorry, Alex, I really tried. But it wasn't like I _wanted _him to come back and approach me," she tried to explain, making him nod.

"I know, Jo, don't worry," he told her quietly. "You're a good doctor," he smiled at her cautiously, kissing her arm again.

"I never thought he'd be like that… I mean… now I feel even worse for how I behaved when he first came in," Jo continued, seemingly nervous. "I know you told me about it before… and I should have known that you didn't… I mean… ugh, I don't know what to say… I guess you can never know how bad something was unless you were there… and I just thought… that making up with your dad would actually help you but now…after today… I actually can't believe I thought like that… I'm so sorry… it sounded terrible," she rambled.

"Hey," Alex hushed her. "It's okay. You couldn't have known. It's over now, alright. I made it through and so did my family. We were better off without him. I just… how do you explain to someone what it's like to have felt the urge to kill your dad when you were a teenager? People don't usually understand… or they wave it off as being overdramatic and pubertal. I just… it wasn't my proudest moment but there wasn't anything else left to do… I needed to protect my family… my sister was only 3 years old…," Alex tried to paint the picture for her.

"It doesn't matter, Alex," she wanted to tell him.

"What doesn't matter?"

"It doesn't matter if people understand or not… it doesn't matter if I have been through what you have or not… I wanna hear it anyways. Or rather… I don't want you to have to deal with it on your own. Just because people haven't been dumped by their parent when they were two weeks old, doesn't mean I can't talk to anyone…," Jo murmured.

"Well, you really haven't…. talked to anyone about it… right?" Alex hiked his eyebrows at her, questioning her statement.

"Well, I told _you_," she tried to defend herself.

"Not really, Jo," he drew her attention to that fact. Jo sighed and shrugged.

"I don't know… I just… I feel like I would tell you… there's just not as much to tell… I could tell you about foster care… but you know…that's not as interesting, either… I just… All I wanna say is please don't be scared to tell me stuff just because you think I can't handle it. I can handle it, seriously. I won't run just because you tell me you have beat up your dad before-."

"I almost killed him," Alex interrupted.

"I almost killed Jason and you didn't run. You rather gave me another chance and we became even closer," she frowned at him. They sat in silence for a bit, pondering.

"I don't mean to cut you out. I just really don't know how to deal with it myself," Alex started up the conversation again.

"I know. And I'm not pushing you to, either. I'm just saying, I'm here if you need me. And please don't be embarrassed because your dad relives your past in front of me. And _please, _don't be mad at me for treating him," Jo started listing, making Alex chuckle and reach his arm up to softly pet her cheek.

"It's fine, Jo, seriously. Stop fussing. I'll get over it," he winked at her. He watched her bite her lip in uncertainty. "I promise I won't make this another thing to push you away, alright? I want to be with you… at some point I'll learn how that works too…," he gave her sheepishly. Jo gave him a smile.

"I love you," she whispered, cupping his head and running her finger through his hair. Alex got up and pulled her with him, making her widen her eyes. "Whoa, dizzy," she spat out, holding onto him. Alex pulled her closer and sighed, running his hand across the back of her head.

"You have a bad bump," he told her, making her wince with his actions. "Sorry," he whispered, pulling her into a side hug, starting to walk outside.

"You think he'll be fine without supervision?"

"He doesn't deserve special treatment, don't push my boundaries," he told her gruffly.

"Okay," she just responded in a very low voice. Alex stopped and turned over towards Jo and looked at her burningly.

"I can't have him hurt you. He hurts all the people he comes in touch with. But you, I can't let him hurt you, more than he already has," he tried to tell her frantically.

"I'm fine, Alex, it doesn't even hurt that bad," she touched the bump and narrowed her eyes again in pain.

"I'm serious, don't make me fight you on this," he told her sharply. Jo let her head fall to the side, looking at him lovingly.

"I won't," she smiled at him slightly, caressing his chest before closing her eyes when Alex leaned in and pecked her lips softly.

"Let's get out of here, come on," he hugged her again, leading her towards the locker rooms in silence, both wondering how many bumps and bruises they'd still have to endure on this journey to closure.


	11. 10x12

[10x12]

Jo walked over towards where Alex was mingling with the bridesmaids speedily, the gravel underneath her high heels crunching loudly. She was pissed. _What the hell had Jackson been thinking? _

"Whoa, your girlfriend looks like she could kill somebody," Cristina pointed out, interrupting their conversation and making Alex turn around to see Jo head towards him. He frowned, not knowing what to expect.

"What's going on?" he asked her, reaching out for her arm as soon as she was in his immediate vicinity. Jo sighed.

"I could finally get Steph to calm down but she's all apathetic and not talking now and I really don't know what to tell her," she closed her eyes and rubbed her hands on her forehead. Meredith and Arizona looked over at her sympathetically, while Cristina looked around for something or someone and Alex tried to calm his girlfriend somehow but didn't know what to say, either.

"Does she need anything? Is there anything we can do?" Arizona spoke up first, seeming apologetic herself even though she had nothing to do with it whatsoever. Jo looked up and shook her head, taking a dramatic sigh and biting her lip madly.

"Did you talk to him?" she nodded over towards Alex who shook his head.

"After they broke up the ceremony, he and Kepner went somewhere to talk and they haven't come back since…," he pointed out, confused about what exactly she wanted from him. Jo just kept shaking her head in disbelief.

"I can't believe he actually did that," she laughed after a second, overwhelmed with everything. Now all eyes were on her. "I hate him. Oh my God, I hate him so much. How could he do that to Steph? With her sitting there? He had months…. Really…. Years to tell freaking Kepner that he wanted her…. He didn't have to do it with having Stephanie around…he didn't have to stay in a relationship with her for like ever… what about that Matthew guy? I mean..._what the hell was he thinking_?!" she blew up all of a sudden, making them all hike their eyebrows. Jo exhaled deeply, trying to calm down, seeing all of their stricken faces. "Well, anyways, I was gonna tell you that I'll drive Steph back to the hospital..or... I don't know...wherever, really...far from here… see you later?" Alex just nodded and Jo turned around to stomp away a couple of steps. Just at that moment, Cristina's cell phone rang and Jo changed her mind in a heartbeat. She turned on her heel, walking back up to Alex who had turned around again, only seeing Meredith and Arizona's curious faces and hooked her hand into his elbow.

"Can we talk a second? Alone?" she asked him, determined.

"Uh, yeah," Alex shrugged at her, completely perplexed.

Jo guided him away a couple of feet and stood before him in silence. She stared at him glowingly, still infuriated about what all had happened, before cupping his head and yanking him down to kiss him hard, obviously startling Alex.

"What the hell, Jo?" he asked her with a burning stare when they broke apart.

"Don't you e_ver _do that to me, you hear me? I will _kill _you with my bare hands… and you know I'm not joking about stuff like that," she shook her head at him madly. Alex had hiked his eyebrows and just looked at her, shaking his head at her too, now, amused though. "You think that's funny?" she slapped his chest, fuming.

"I think it's ridiculous," he told her, chuckling before pulling her into a much fended hug due to various reasons, her being all mad about what happened with Jackson and her superiors standing all around them watching them and if she was being honest with herself, for some reason this whole thing had sparked just a tiny bit of fear within Jo about what all could happen in a relationship even though you had no idea and no chance of preparing yourself for that. After a moment though, since she really didn't know what else to do, she wrapped her arms around his neck and reciprocated the hug.

"Sorry," she murmured, swaying in his embrace, standing on the tips of her toes, sighing.

"What do you mean he froze?" Cristina's sharp voice pulled them out of their momentary trance, parting a bit and looking over in confusion. They watched Cristina glare towards them as well, listening to the person on the other end of the line. Alex shook his head lightly, questioning, for people kept eyeing him madly today for no good reason at all.

"What?" he snapped back, grudgingly letting go of Jo and putting his hands onto his hips. They both watched her walk closer, still listening to the voice, before angling the phone away, covering the speaker and whispering towards them.

"It's your dad. It's bad," she informed him, making Jo snap her head up and look at her furiously.

"Oh my God, what is it? I told Leah to take him over while I was here, is she there? What happened? What did she do?" she asked frantically. Cristina just shook her head and shushed her in irritation. She motioned for them to walk with her over to the parking space.

"I'll try to come in as fast as possible, I'm already at the car. Keep him alive until then," Cristina barked her orders into the phone, making them both wide-eyed. She hung up aggressively and sighed when she looked up, seeing their inquiring faces.

"What the hell is going on?" Alex immediately asked.

"It's bad. He had a heart attack, Shane and Murphy tried treating him," she said, looking at Alex apologetically. "I don't know what happened exactly," Jimmy's doctor explained, already walking over towards her car, Alex and Jo following swiftly. "Shane had to open him up. The nurse said something about him going completely crazy…freezing in the middle of it... I don't know what that means. Webber had to take over," she continued.

"What do you mean c_razy? _What the hell did he do?" Alex maddened quickly.

"Webber? But he isn't a cardio surgeon? He isn't even _really _all back to business," Jo immediately interjected.

"Well, I'm aware of that, that's why they called me. I'm gonna drive over there as fast as I can and see what I can do," Yang squeezed Alex's arm, making him nod, before getting into her car.

"I shouldn't have left him, I'm sorry," Jo shook her head at Alex.

"You couldn't have done anything, either, if something had happened on your watch. Let's just go and see what's happening, alright?" he told her matter-of-factly, sounding like he tried to be calm but really, was beyond mad, earning an insecure nod from her. "You should go be with Edwards," he nodded over to her car, in which Steph was occupying the passenger seat, looking all devastated. Jo sighed and rubbed her forehead again.

"What the hell is the point of this day?" she ranted. Alex sighed as well before pulling her a little closer.

"Well, how about you think about what we talked about before the wedding…or non-wedding," he added, looking at the sky, trying to decide. "That'll make the point of it all much clearer, don't you think?" he asked her, trying to lighten her mood, but also trying to distract himself before going into that car and taking out his slowly rising turmoil inside of him out on the road.

"How are you so calm with this?" Jo replied to him. Alex sighed, shaking his head.

"What do you want me to say? I can't do anything about Jackson eventually admitting that he still has the hots for Kepner apparently-," he started.

"I'm not talking about that," Jo interrupted.

"Jimmy… he's had a heart condition forever… if he hadn't come here in first place, I would have thought he had overdosed by now. With having had the heart surgery done a while ago and now going through withdrawal... I'm not shocked about him going into MI," Alex shrugged. "Also, there isn't anything I can do right now. We'll all have to go back to the hospital and see what happened. The only thing I'm curious right now is what role Ross played in all this…," he trailed off, looking back at the barn, pondering.

"Yang will surely fix it, right?" Jo reached out to cup his cheek to bring him back to their conversation.

"We'll see," he turned back, giving her a fake smile, making her look at him in pain. She brought up her second hand too and pulled him towards her again, making their lips touch. When they parted, Jo's eyes immediately fled his, and he rubbed her back. "So, do I have to be scared now that you'll ponder about potential murder plans?" he chuckled. Jo reached up and slapped the back of his head.

"You really think this is appropriate timing? How can you be so chill?"

"I'm not, I'm pretending everything's fine until it's not," he reported to her.

"Well, _there's_ a way to deal with life," she mocked him heavily.

"I'll leave in one second and then I'll be unbearable again if that Ross kid messed up somehow, I promise," he told her, kissing her again, making her roll her eyes. When he stepped back to walk over to his own car, Jo reached out and barely caught his arm, making him look back. "What?" he asked her, surprised. Jo's eyes were narrowed and she looked like she was trying to decide what to say.

"There aren't any… ex-girlfriends or ex-wives that will potentially destroy my plan of keeping my anger down and trying to deal with my violent outbursts, right?" Alex snorted.

"There's lots of them but none of them are worth getting your hands bloody for," he told her, his lips playing a smirk. Jo's face didn't twitch when she stared him down, making him roll his eyes. "Oh, come on. Just because Jackson dumped Stephanie at his ex-girlfriend's…nope, wait… ex-hook-up's wedding… doesn't mean I will, since when are you so paranoid?"

"Since I didn't know that people actually do crazy stuff like that," she pointed out, still seeming mad.

"How do I have to pay for his stupidity?"

"You don't," Jo finally shook her head, sighing deeply. "You're right, I'm being paranoid…and bitchy. I just… ugh, I think I might really hate him," she said, pushing Alex's chest to get him going and turning round to get into her own car. Alex, though, wouldn't let her escape that fast and held her back, side hugging her and kissing her temple.

"You have nothing whatsoever to worry about, alright?" he whispered into her ear, making her close her eyes and nod after a moment.

"It's killing me that I've become one of those sappy, love thirsty girls that have to talk about their own relationships even though their best friend just got dumped at a wedding and is hurting beyond imagination and your father is… is...oh God, Alex, we really gotta go," she yanked open her eyes and kissed his cheek quickly, jogging to her car. "See you over there, alright?" Alex nodded before walking over to his car and shaking his head, chuckling. When he sat down in the driver's seat, he let out a long breath. He really didn't know if he could deal with a fatally ill Jimmy as well. If he had even survived until they got there. He put his head on the steering wheel and sighed. _What a crap day. _Well, at least he had Jo. _Yes, at least he had Jo. _Alex smiled, starting the engine, and drove towards the hospital, oblivious about what was really going on and awaiting him there.


	12. 10x13

They stood in silence, observing Jimmy's lifeless body lying in the ICU bed. Jo felt dazed. She didn't feel the need to cry, she wasn't angry anymore, no confusion or irritation, pretty much nothing. She felt like she was just standing there, looking at a dead man, not knowing how to feel. Not knowing what feelings the dead man lying there even deserved. What the man holding her hand allowed for her to feel. She didn't know. She couldn't decide, either, if she wanted to have any personal feelings about it. Yes, she had gotten to know Jimmy. She just didn't quite know if it had been for the better. Sure, yes, Alex certainly felt better that he had to confront all his emotions and issues about his dad. But they had parted badly, with Alex yelling at him. That surely couldn't feel all too good. Now he was dead, and lots of emotions were in the room that really shouldn't be in a dead man's room. Shane's guilt and regret. Alex's anger issues, disappointment, longing for a stable father figure in his life. Jo's insecurity about how to deal with everything, deal with Jimmy, deal with Alex. Jo's eyes that had lingered on Jimmy's shrunken, bloodless face, flew across the room, trying to think. _Where to start? _

_Alright, Jo, what _do_ you feel? What _can_ you do? _Jo looked down at Alex's hair and sighed before she realized something. There actually _was _something she was feeling, feeling very strongly. And she needed to voice it. Be it a really inappropriate timing, but she needed to say it out loud. Now that she thought about it, though, she really didn't think saying this had appropriate or inappropriate timing. Slowly, she leaned down and wrapped her arms around Alex's torso, putting her head next to his on his shoulder, feeling how he immediately closed his eyes and leaned his against hers. She closed her eyes for a second as well before Alex brought up his right hand and held onto her arms, squeezing them for comfort. She couldn't help but smile. When she opened her eyes and pretty much simultaneously opened her mouth, she got distracted by Alex's knuckles.

"Alex," she heard herself yelp a little too loudly and was surprised by it just as well. Alex turned his head an inch and looked at her questioningly. "What did you do?" she whispered, trying to be more tactful, loosening her grip on him and gently ran her thumb across the back of his hand, making him wince. "Sorry."

"Ross," he just said, putting his hand back on his thigh to make her stop touching it. Jo sighed before taking a step over to his side, squatting down to look and talk to him.

"You beat up Shane?" she asked him in a small voice. Alex just nodded, averting his eyes again to stare at his dad. Jo tried to make out again what she was feeling. Then she shook her head. "I can't even blame you," Jo sighed, making his eyes flit at her for a second. Jo propped her head to the right, looking at him in pain. "Even though I thought we were working on our anger issues," she smiled at him cautiously. He mirrored her facials for a second before going back to staring again.

"He irked me," Alex shrugged. Jo had to scrunch up her face, realizing what emotions she harbored inside her. She was hurting for Alex.

"He irked you?" she repeated his words, trying to get her eyes from watering and not sounding too mocking although she knew he had chosen his words just as deliberately.

"Yeah." They sat in silence, Alex staring at his dead dad while Jo stared at him.

"Alex. Jimmy is dead. And what I said today, about grieving," Jo started, Alex's head dropped to look at her like he was going to disapprove, however, Jo had already anticipated an interjection and sighed, looking at him piercingly, and she knew that he knew he had to listen to her now. "I'm not saying that you're grieving because he's dying… or well… dead. I'm not," she shook her head. "But you are grieving your dad. I mean, really, you were grieving _a_ dad. For all I know, you were grieving for you couldn't make amends with him after parting in anger before the wedding, or maybe you were grieving for your childhood, or a lost life to drugs, or you were grieving for your mother and siblings. You were grieving for yourself. For the fact that he still didn't manage to be there for you but you have to concern yourself with his stuff again, especially now. Look, Alex, I'm not saying that you are grieving because you just lost your dad, I'm not. I'm just saying, you are grieving, and you really _are_," Jo looked at him burningly, stressing the last part, trying to make him see.

"We did talk once more after I yelled at him," Alex pointed out weakly.

"What are you talking about?" Jo looked puzzled.

"Before the wedding, I went back in there and told him that it was fine and he should stop trying to… I don't know… I just wanted to cut the loose ends. I just… we shook hands and I told him I don't need him anymore…but I won't be angry with him anymore, either," Alex recounted lazily.

"Why didn't you tell?" Jo breathed out, feeling like having missed a crucial piece.

"I had other things on my mind…," Alex matched eyes with Jo for a split second before completely avoiding her gaze. Suddenly, everything made sense for her. He had made amends with his dad, or at least had tried to make closure as well as possible and then he had come and asked _her_ to be his family. He had told her they could conquer all, she was his family, he was hers. And it was true, of course it was true. But now Jo saw why it had been such a stab for Alex once she had taken it back. She closed her eyes for a second, trying to gather herself.

"Like… the proposal?" she murmured towards him. He didn't react first, but after a couple of moments, he shrugged and gave her a curt nod. "Oh, Alex," she sighed, reaching up and turning his face. "_I am not running_," she tried to stress every single word in that sentence."We _are _a family, and we _don't _need anyone else, Alex," she shook her head, seeing how Alex's eyes looked distant and pained which made her insides hurt even more. "I am not walking out on you. I am not going anywhere, do you hear me?" Jo felt how her insides were burning with desperation and helplessness. She tapped her toes on the floor quietly and scratched her lower lip with her teeth before deciding again, that _this w_as never inappropriate. She got up, sitting herself in his lap, making him look up at her astonished and put his face into her hands. "Turning you down does not mean I don't wanna marry you. It means it's way too early, and I'm not ready for it," she repeated the words from this afternoon but she realized, Alex was either not listening very closely or he just couldn't process well enough. She sighed before swooping in and kissing him, deeply. She pulled back in exasperation when he didn't even reciprocate. "Alex," she shook her head at him. "I didn't _reject _you. You can kiss me back. You didn't lose your face or anything. We don't need to be awkward about it, we don't need to fight about it. I'm sorry I didn't understand. But it really doesn't matter," Jo said, and she could see in his eyes that this was the first thing that made his eyes flicker a tiny bit. She gave him the tiniest smile. "It doesn't matter because what you said, it's all true, and I said a hundred percent yes to everything you said. I just didn't say yes to your proposal, alright? Right now, I still don't wanna get married. But I wanna spend my life with you, and I'm excited about it and I'm desperate about it and I need you to see that I'm not going anywhere. I swear. I'm not. I'm not leaving. I love you," she told him, trying to make out if he was going to react or not. They sat staring at each other before Jo could hear him take a deep breath and avert his eyes for a second, wetting his lips, shaping one very quiet word.

"Sorry," he muttered.

"No, baby, you have nothing to be sorry for," she said, wrapping her arms around his neck now and kissing him, her insides feeling like a surge of oxygen flooded her when he finally kissed her back, bringing his arms up to hug her to him. They parted for air, resting their foreheads together.

"I thought it was… it felt right…," he whispered, and Jo felt another surge of pain.

"It _is _right. We_ are_ right. _This_ is so right," Jo shook her head, pecking his lips again. "But timing isn't. I just… We need to talk about this once we are both… well… I'm…," she exhaled. "I love you, alright? I don't wanna not be with you. I wanna be with you forever if possible. And the thought of you wanting to marry me, you thinking that I am the one that you wanna spend your life with, who's your family… it makes me tear up even though I don't even have surgeries to con out of you," she finished her speech, making him chuckle and putting her head into the crook of his neck. Alex kissed her forehead tenderly.

"I didn't mean to rush you. I just. It felt right. It still does," he repeated.

"Because it is," she agreed again. They sat with each other, looking at Jimmy. "I know there's nothing anybody could say right now that would mean something… I just… for what it's worth… I'm sorry," she whispered against his skin.

"Yeah, me too," Alex said slowly.

"I'm still glad I got to meet him, though. I kinda wanna think I know you a little better now. And if there's nothing in the world that he did you favors with… count that one as having accomplished successfully. He made me love you even more," she whispered when Alex turned his head to look at her.

"Well, he didn't make you marry me," Alex tried to joke, making her raise her eyebrows.

"Really?" she asked him questioningly, smiling though.

"Nah, way too soon," he conceded, closing his eyes and leaning towards her, letting her kiss his cheek and joined their hands on his chest. "I wish everything was already over," he said after a while, opening up his eyes again. "I don't feel like dealing with," Alex gestured towards his dead father, "him."

"We'll do it. We can help," a voice behind them said, making them both startle and snap up their heads, spotting Meredith coming in.

"Fuck, Mer, how long have you been standing there?"

"I just came in and heard you say you don't wanna deal with him," his friend whispered, smiling at him slightly before turning towards his father. "I'm so sorry," she turned back, looking at them both.

"Thanks, Mer," Alex appreciated her sincerity. "Let's go home," he suggested towards Jo, which she nodded off. They got up, Jo smiled at Meredith gratefully, watching Alex squeeze her hand for a second before walking out together, informing the nurse about their leaving, and entwined their fingers when they walked quietly towards their respective locker rooms. To a bystander, the couple looked exactly the same. For themselves they knew, though, they had both changed within the last several weeks, and as a couple, they had only grown closer. Jo squeezed Alex's hand one more time before turning into the residents' locker room. He looked over at her and smiled. When their eyes matched, they knew. _Everything would be okay. Everything would be okay as long as they had each other. And that they really did._


	13. 10x14

[10x14]

Jo parked the car at the curb a little too aggressively, hitting it with the tires, but she didn't care. She killed the engine, yanked out the key and scrambled up her stuff madly. She was fuming. She got out of the car and made her way up to the door in record time, pushing the key into the lock and gave herself a noisy entry, immediately dropping all of her stuff and stomping towards the kitchen since she could see that this was the only room that cast some light into the dark hallway, anticipating meeting her boyfriend in there. When she entered, Alex was standing halfway between the island and the door, looking at her in surprise, as if he had just made his way towards the clanking and stomping.

"What's going on?" he asked her, seeming puzzled.

"What the hell do you think you did back there? What were you thinking, you stupid idiot?" Jo instantly raged at him, closing the gap in between them and pushing his chest. Alex yanked his head back in wonder, grabbing her wrists to still her.

"Jo, calm down," he tried to soothe her.

"No, I'm not gonna calm down," she yelled back at him. "Do you feel better now? After your big entrance and your big speech that only made matters worse? Do you feel better now that _I_ have to pay for your impulsive behavior?" Jo glared at him madly.

"Jo, you're not gonna get fired. If anything, they're gonna punish _me_," he pointed out for her. Jo snorted.

"Yeah? So is that the reason why they put me on _probation?_"

"They freaking put you on probation?" Alex maddened now as well.

"Yeah," she said with snide laughter, passing him by and getting a beer out of the fridge, opening it violently and taking a huge gulp. "They said they were so very sorry for how things worked out for us but since they just established that rule, they have to see it through now. You know because of the complaint," Jo informed him mockingly, putting the beer down and rubbing her face.

"They can't do that, come on," Alex tried half-heartedly.

"Well, they _did_," Jo put her hands down and barked at him. Alex sighed, not knowing what to say. "What the hell am I supposed to do now?" she looked at him and her eyes reflected desperation. Alex looked back at her in uncertainty.

"Look, I'm sure all of this will calm down and nobody won't ever really care about it anymore in a month or two," he suggested, taking a step towards her.

"Yeah? You're sure about that? I'm glad you are because I'm not even sure how in the world I'm supposed to finish my residency here," she taunted him.

"Oh, stop fussing now, you're being ridiculous," Alex gave her back.

"Oh really? I'm ridiculous? What's your plan then? What do you think we should do? I mean, apparently you are off the hook or something, especially because they're all your precious buddies, whatever," Jo flung her arms in the air. "But I'm screwed. If we wanna keep this up, I'm screwed, do you get that?" They stared at each other for a minute before Jo exhaled deeply, closing her eyes and shaking her head. When she opened them up again, she shrugged and looked close to crying. "I don't even know what to do anymore," she told him in a small voice.

"I'm sorry," Alex responded to her quietly, feeling like she actually _was _carrying the entire burden of them being together.

"Well, there's something that gets me somewhere," she told him derisively, walking over towards the barstools and flopping down on one, putting her head into her arms, lying down on the counter.

"I didn't think Webber would actually tell on us," he said. "I mean we weren't even doing anything… what about Kepner and Avery?"

"They're married," she replied, dismissively.

"They're what?"

"They got married," Jo muttered into her scarf. She looked at him as he just stood there with raised eyes, shaking his head in disbelief.

"So, you know anything about who filed the complaint?"

"Leah."

"What? Why?" Alex's eyes bulged.

"Because she felt her education suffered from all the personal relations in the hospital," Jo told him mockingly. Alex scrunched up his face.

"I never treated her differently. I treat everyone like crap," Alex pointed out, making Jo roll her eyes and snort.

"She wasn't doing it for you, idiot. She was talking about Robbins," she enlightened him. Alex nodded.

"So now she freaking makes our life hell because she can't get over the people she sleeps with? What's with that girl?"

"She kinda had a point there. Or at least Shane did. We couldn't save Rory today…if we had worked together from the beginning, we could have come to you sooner," Jo pondered, devastated about the loss and its meaning.

"We couldn't have saved her no matter what, Jo," Alex stepped closer now. "We couldn't have done any treatments on her, she was bleeding out on the insides. There was too much damage. It wasn't your fault and it doesn't mean that our relationship is a bad thing," he told her matter-of-factly. "Because that's what you're getting at, right? You are playing with the thought of…I don't know… you tell me," he inched closer tentatively. Jo propped up her head into her palms and looked at him.

"I'm not thinking about breaking up, Alex. I'm just saying…. What if they're right? No, what I'm really saying is…for today at least…they are right. I got so distracted with trying to sneak around, trying to think of ways how to be with you but not destroy my career, how to be mad and show it to Steph-," she elaborated before being interrupted.

"Why her?"

"I thought she had filed the complaint… because of Avery…," she pointed out. Alex nodded.

"We all did," he agreed.

"So, I was distracted. And I can't be distracted, Alex, not when I wanna do a job that's supposed to be saving lives," her tone of voice had gotten more urgent.

"Look, there are so many things that distract you on a daily basis. Paying the bills, putting gas in the car, feeding yourself, keeping up on research, meeting deadlines, patients, family, friends, look at what happened when Yang and Grey had their fall out. Mer was completely off track. What about that? Can't we have friends now at the hospital? Because the friendship could go through a hiccup and then your medical career goes to waste? What about if you're distracted because you're buying a house and you can't figure out which one or if or if not to buy it because you don't even know if the relationship is that safe? What about that? Married couples have problems, too. Too many problems. They fight, too. They get distracted. Everybody does. We're humans. Just because you are still in your residency, doesn't mean us attendings don't have to be just as sharp every day, have to be focused on the job, have to be on top of things. We're all still learning. And we need to make medical decisions. Every freaking day. If they need people who are never distracted, they need to learn how to do surgeries without humans. Cause it's impossible. Don't blame yourself for being distracted. And that was my point today, you know… you say they're my friends? Really? Did that sound to you like they were my friends today? I don't think so. They were hypocritical bastards and I'm not gonna apologize for being with you. I'm not gonna hide anymore and I'm not gonna hide the fact that you and I _do _care for each other. Just because they think that stupid rule and dishing out punishments make the fact better that one insecure resident filed a complaint. Just because they think it's gonna change anything. It's not. But I get it if you think about it differently… I do. I don't wanna downplay it if you think it's… if you don't want…," Alex ended his monologue when he seemed to be out of words. Jo looked at him with pain in her eyes.

"How did we go through hell and back since we started dating and managed to stick with each other and now we can't be with each other? I don't get it, Alex," she shook her head and looked at the ceiling to keep her tears in. Alex approached her cautiously and put his hand on her forearm gently. When they matched eyes, Jo let out a small sob.

"We're gonna get through this, too, alright? I'm not giving up on us just because they say it's not okay to not be married at this hospital," he said. Jo had built a deep crease on her forehead. When she tried to say something, all that came out was a gasp and she put her hand to her mouth, shaking her head again and a couple of tears escaped her eyes. "Come here," Alex whispered, taking her into his arms, where she started to weep bitterly. He squeezed her tightly and stroked her hair, feeling how the tears wet his shirt.

"I can't marry you just because they made that stupid rule," Jo spat out between sobs. Alex scrunched up his face and bent down to be eyelevel with Jo, pulling them apart.

"What the hell? Where's that coming from? We're not gonna get married because of that," he chuckled, making her cry even more. "Oh come on, now, calm down, you're overreacting," Alex rubbed her back, pushing her back into his embrace.

"No, I'm not," she yelled frantically.

"Come here," Alex said, bending down again and pushing his lips to hers intensely. Jo's arms slowly rose and she cupped his cheeks firmly. When they broke, they both took a deep breath and Alex could feel Jo's hands tremble slightly. "It's gonna be fine, alright? We'll work something out. I promise this is not the end of your career and I promise you won't have to marry me," he told her with a slight tug at the corner of his lips. Jo hiccupped a small chuckle.

"God, how are we talking about this again?" Alex stroked Jo's cheek lovingly when she smiled through her tears. They both startled when they heard a couple of people shuffle into the kitchen, looking up. Alex immediately burst.

"Oh, get out of here," he spat at them cruelly.

"Alex," Meredith instantly chided him, giving him a pained face.

"No, seriously, get the hell out of my house," he directed them while Jo wiped her face looking the other way.

"Come on, you know we can't really do anything….," Cristina started out.

"Yes, you sure can. _Get out of my house_," he repeated, his voice growing stronger and louder.

"I live here. Are you gonna tell me to go to my room?" Cristina mocked back.

"You know what, I'm done listening to this. I'm gonna go upstairs," Jo got up from the barstool quickly and gave him a small smile before passing through Meredith and Cristina, not even looking at them.

"Is she okay?" Meredith asked, seemingly concerned.

"What do you think?" Alex snarled back, making her prop her head to the side.

"Alex," she shook her head, trying to reach out for him but he shrugged her off.

"You know what. Save it. You've done more than enough. It's cool if you wanna reign over every person at the hospital, it's cool if you're all happy and married and make mistakes or get distracted because of something else, maybe regarding the freaking poop schedule of your kids," he shot over towards Meredith before turning to Cristina, "or pining after your ex-husband and screwing residents in a way that they go crazy and hack up other people's hearts, so they die," he yelled. "It's fine with me, really. I don't care. I don't care if I almost lose patients, I don't care if Jimmy dies, it's fine, because I'm the guy that always gets screwed. If you wanna deal out probations to people that are in a happy, stable relationship, never having once fallen out of line but on the other hand keep giving out second chances for people that actually helped patients die… if that is how you wanna run your freaking hospital, well then, that's fine with me. But seriously, I'm not sure if I even wanna work at that hospital anymore, taking _your_ crap all day. Why don't you put me on probation as well? After all, I'm going to go upstairs now, and be with my girlfriend who is actually _dreading _the thought of having to marry me now and try to convince her that being in a relationship with me is not going to end her career. Excuse me," he hissed at them, leaving them standing in the kitchen, speechless. When he banged the bedroom door closed and saw Jo waiting, sitting at the edge of the bed, looking down on her feet, his heart broke.

"I don't dread marrying you, Alex," she repeated what she thought had to have been the umpteenth time.

"It's fine," he said, still livid about his encounter with his supposed friends.

"No," Jo got up and walked over towards him, putting her arms around his waist. "I love you. And I was only that distracted today since I couldn't figure out how to manage keeping you _and_ my job," she pointed out.

"Did the thought of breaking up cross your mind at all? After all, the first thing you did suggest is fake a break up…," he inquired quietly, looking down.

"No," Jo scrunched up her face at him, trying to match eyes. "No, Alex, that's the point," she shook her head at him. "I can't break up with you, it's gonna distract me more than figuring out how to deal with this mess," she said, trying to lighten the mood.

"Only for a bit, then you'd be sharp for the rest of your residency," he argued.

"No," Jo shook her head again, laughing now, almost patronizingly. "Trust me, I wouldn't," she said when they finally matched eyes. "I don't wanna be without you and I'm not sure I even can. I got pretty comfortable with you and I don't even wanna try," she stressed every word of that.

"So, we'll just… what?"

"Try to figure it out?" Jo suggested.

"Okay, if that's what you want," he responded.

"Yes, that's what I want, Alex. Please don't turn this around on me. We're not breaking up and the thought has not crossed my mind, got it?"

"Got it," Alex nodded curtly.

"Good. Can we not talk about break-ups anymore? Gives me the creeps," she pulled up her shoulders and fake trembled, leaning into Alex's embrace. He just chuckled and kissed her temple lovingly.

"We'll make it through this, I promise."


	14. 10x15

[10x15]

Jo looked around the restaurant, searching the tables for Alex. She was exhausted and didn't feel like being here at all. She just wanted to crawl into bed and bury herself under piles of blankets and forget about this day. Alex had begged her to come here, though, and she hadn't had the energy to turn him down either. She smiled slightly when the waiter came up to her.

"Table for one?" he asked her politely.

"Actually I'm meeting someone," she replied to him in the friendliest voice she could conjure up. At this moment she spotted Alex over by the window in a corner, waving her over. She smiled at the waiter gratefully and walked over, scooting into the seat across from her boyfriend, sighing.

"Hey," he smiled at her cautiously, sizing up her mood.

"Why couldn't we have just gone home?" she asked him, tiredly.

"Well, I thought the smell of spare ribs would cheer you up a bit," Alex tried hesitantly. Jo rubbed her face.

"I'm not even sure I'm that hungry," she gave him back, ordering a beer for herself.

"I didn't wanna see any of their faces tonight. Not at the hospital or the bar or at home for that matter," Alex said in a small voice. Jo smiled at him slightly.

"I know. I'm pretty done with that, too," she responded, leaning back in her chair.

"How was the rest of your day?" Alex inched towards her mindset timidly.

"Ugh, crap. The organ donor went into cardiac arrest and I kinda slipped the news to a friend of his while telling Kepner without much fuss," Jo informed him, rubbing her face.

"I'm sorry," Alex reached over to stroke his thumb over the back of her hand when she put her arm down to rest it on the table. Jo nodded.

"Yeah," Jo just said, seemingly out of words.

"You tired?" Alex tried to keep the conversation going.

"Exhausted," she said. They sat in silence for a bit before the waiter came and they ordered their food.

"The surgery worked," Alex reported back to her, trying to give her some good news. "You helped save the boy with giving me the idea about the appendix," he added. Jo smiled.

"I'm glad," she just said, tugging at the sleeves of her shirt. She looked up when he didn't elaborate and saw him looking down to his cutlery, looking beaten as well. "You should have been the one doing it, though," Jo finally tried to cheer him up as well, having realized that he wasn't all happy either. Alex nodded without looking at her. "I'm sorry they took it away from you. It was one hell of a save and it should have been yours," she reached over now and took his hand into hers, trying for him to look at her. Alex nodded again. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Alex looked up and smiled, but she could see it was fake, too. "I'm glad he's okay now." Jo nodded slowly, thinking about what to say.

"I'm pretty sure they all realized it was your breakthrough. They can't just take that away from you," she stressed again, believing that was what bothered her boyfriend.

"It's over now, anyways. It's all good. The boy is doing well and I'm glad. Doesn't matter who did the surgery anyways. People will have forgotten about it in a week or two," he pointed out.

"I won't have," Jo tried to make him see. "And I'm sad that the chief's and the board's goal is now to rather try keeping us apart than seeing what amazing doctors they have working for them. You know, it never made sense to me that successes are always dealt with as in…well, we expected that from you, but failures are always dragged completely out of proportion. Especially, if the "failure"," she signed imaginary quotes in the air, "is us being in a relationship." Alex just shrugged.

"Did you hear Murphy had filed the complaint against Torres, not Robbins?" he changed the subject. Jo hiked her eyebrows.

"Are you serious? What for?" she asked in disbelief.

"I'm not entirely sure. Didn't hear anything about it. But if she actually did, she probably must have had profound reason…otherwise they wouldn't have taken her seriously… I guess," Alex shrugged again.

"That's probably true, yeah," Jo responded, thinking. "Did you hear about the dumpster baby?" Alex sighed deeply, looking at her through narrowed eyes.

"Yeah, sorry, I totally forgot, I meant to ask you about it. I'm so sorry, Jo," he told her, looking sympathetic.

"What for?" she just shot back at him questioningly.

"That you were the one to find him," he replied in confusion as if it was completely obvious.

"Oh," Jo snorted. "No," she shook her head no with a scrunched up face. "I'm just glad we did. And I'm kinda pissed that they actually wouldn't let me be on his case. But I'm also pretty sure I'm pissed about pretty much everything right now," she concluded.

"Which includes me, right?"

"What? No, why?" Jo asked him, taken aback.

"Well…. I did go after you today whereas you didn't want me to and Hunt caught us… and generally, you still seemed a bit off towards me since I blew up on the board the other day," he told her quietly. Jo sighed, trying to shape words herself.

"Well, yeah, you probably shouldn't have come after me today, there was no point in getting told off again when we're already on suspension," she admitted.

"I don't get it. We've been a couple. For a while now. Then they establish that rule, and what? Did they expect us to separate because of that? But then at the meeting they were all like… what you do at home is your business…and then they suspended you from Peds and me from the OR.., which okay, was because of the closet thing… even thought that was far from fraternizing but whatever… so what do they expect from us now? That you'll never be on Peds again? That we'll never be in the same room again at work? That we don't talk or stand next to each other? Can we have lunch together? What if… say… you're in Ortho but it's a 5 year old… does Arizona have to take all the Peds cases with you or do _you_ have to leave the room? I don't really get what they want from us… it's like… ugh," he ranted, looking at Jo who was biting her lips. "You know, I'd understand if A we had _fraternized _after the rule was established or B we weren't a real thing…like only sleeping together. I'd maybe understand. But none of that applies to us. So, no, I really don't care what Hunt says at the moment. He might have made amends with you in giving you a potential six surgeries patient… but I sure as hell am not going to play nice with him," he said, smiling gratefully at the waiter when he brought their food. When Jo didn't reply, he looked over at her. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to make it extra hard for you," he added quietly.

"No, I know. It all sucks. I know you are pissed, too. I just…. I'm still scared that this will at some point mark the end of my career," she told him.

"I'll go before that happens," Alex responded casually, biting into one of his ribs. Jo looked at him in surprise.

"What do you mean by that?" Alex shrugged at her, chewing before articulating his answer.

"Either we'll find some way to deal with this," he said. "Or I'll go look for another job at another hospital. It's fine. I want you to have the best education there is. And I don't want you to have to fight for it daily, just because you're with me. I don't want that," he said, averting his eyes to indulge in his food.

"I don't want you to do that," Jo said, her voice sounding a bit weird.

"Why?"

"I don't want you to give up your job, your friends, your colleagues, your patients, your home…," she said.

"There is more than one hospital in Seattle, Jo," he said.

"I know that. But still. You've been here forever. I don't want you to give that up," she stressed again.

"I'm not. But if it's the only way it works, I will. I don't wanna stand in between you and your education," Alex informed her matter-of-factly.

"But you're not, Alex. They are. They, who are making a big deal about us dating, are standing in between me and my education. It's not you who has to make changes. It's them," she looked pretty upset. "I just don't wanna overdo the whole rebel attitude and get kicked out or something..," she explained.

"You won't get kicked out, I promise," Alex reassured her.

"There must be a way to end this whole freaking situation….right? I mean, this is just ridiculous," Jo looked at him questioningly. Alex looked back at her, pondering. A conversation he'd had a couple of hours ago with Mer popped into his mind but he didn't dare say anything. It was stupid and if Meredith thought that stupid paper made anything better, she was wrong. It really didn't.

"How about we enjoy this evening and try to figure things out once we know a little more about how the hospital will go further with this all… you know… maybe after they have all talked it out… Murphy and Torres and Robbins… maybe they'll take it back… I don't know… let's not be too hasty going about this… maybe it'll work itself out…," Alex suggested. Jo looked at him, insecure though.

"I don't know, Alex. I just don't wanna lose this job. Or you," she said.

"You won't, I promise, alright? Please don't freak. I know it's hard right now and irritating and unfair… but please, I… I'll try everything to make it better, alright? I'll think of something, okay?" Alex actually reached out for her hand and entwined her fingers with his. Jo gave him the tiniest smile and nodded. "Please don't… give up just yet…," he asked her.

"I won't," Jo narrowed her eyes at him. "Especially on us, you know that, right?"

They sat, looking at each other, having half forgotten about their food, while pondering how to go from here. How had it happened that they had gone from happy and carefree to fearing the loss of a job or each other every spare minute of their days? Alex didn't know. But he sure as hell was going to fight for Jo, whatever it took. He couldn't have her walk away from him. He just couldn't.


	15. 10x16

[10x16]

"Cheers!" everybody exclaimed happily, toasting to Dr. Webber. The room was buzzing with the good mood and Jo felt her insides pretty fitting to everything around. For the first time in weeks, she felt relieved, she felt light, as if she was floating in seventh heaven. While she had a sip of her Champaign, she squeezed Alex's waist that she was holding onto tightly and looked over, snuggling into the crook of his arm, smiling up at him. They looked at each other. Of course, signing the love contract had made it possible and Jo was glad she had, however, it wasn't that. It wasn't the fact that they were _allowed _to be with each other now. No, it was the fact that she was standing in a room full of people, Alex's arms around her, looking up at him, forgetting everything around them, and feeling so right. Being that close to him, it just felt right. Looking at him without communicating via words, it just felt right. When Alex bent down to place a soft kiss on her lips, it felt right. It felt like all of her life she had waited for a sign that something she did was right, and now this was. Alex and her… they were right for each other. And it didn't matter if she thought the stupid love contract was… well stupid. Alex was right. Jo didn't wanna miss out on any more moments like this, moments of being intimate with each other, even if it was amongst a group of fellow surgeons, sometimes that didn't matter. Sometimes they just needed a moment, and they really deserved a moment. So, yes, everything felt perfect.

Jo turned her entire body towards him, her eyes burning into his, having slung her arm around his waist tightly. "I feel like going home," she whispered towards him, sharing a small smile.

"Ha, I totally feel like staying here and showing you off some more. Making use of the _looove_ contract, you know…?" Alex smirked at her, making her shake her head in amusement. She turned around, trying to get back into the conversation of the others, feeling how Alex peppered gentle kisses to her neck and the firm grip of his hand on her. She sighed, deeply, trying to steady. She knew the moment he had said it, he was trying to test her. She was strong, she could do it._ How many times had she resisted his lingering looks, his feathery light touches?_ Jo focused on the subject at hand, listened to Stephanie illustrate something to Leah and Shane but her mind wouldn't quite let her there. She scrunched up her face while her guts dropped a bit when Alex started caressing her sides. Jo scowled. He knew just how to get to her and make it look so harmless, barely noticeable to a bystander. Her thoughts trailed over towards that subject again. _Had she actually ever withstood him?_ Oh God, now that she thought of it…she really didn't think so. But why should she anyways, right? He was hers. He was doing it all for her. He was with _her. _He was definitely only doing this for her. The more Jo thought about it, the more she had to smile, and even though she tried to hide it, the smile widened on her face while she closed her eyes and let his lips seduce her, his lips that were trailing up her neck now, his nose buried in her hair, his hot breaths tickling her ear. Jo grabbed the arm that was still caressing her right side and pulled it down, holding onto it firmly. "Ready whenever you are…," Alex murmured into her ear in a raspy voice, making her suck in a deep breath through her nose and bite her lower lips, steadying herself.

Jo opened her eyes, entwined her fingers with his and smiled innocently. "Hey guys, we're going home," she told them completely disciplined, no trace of anything to be heard in her voice. They all nodded and said their good-byes. They walked by the bar table Arizona and Meredith had gathered at, halting shortly. Jo leaned against her boyfriend's tall frame, him having wrapped a protective arm around her.

"You guys leaving already?" Meredith looked at them both with something that reminded Jo of uncertainty mixed with cheerfulness. And curiosity. Alex talked to them but she only stared. She didn't take her eyes of Grey, wearing a very impartial face, not trying to give her anything. They may have overcome their difficulties, however, she still was no fan of what all of the board members had tried to pull with them. Especially considering that they were Alex's friends. Jo observed as Grey flitted her eyes back to her own face every several seconds, as if keeping an eye on her. When Alex finally said his goodbyes and they walked out together, Jo felt dazed. She turned her face to kiss Alex's chest, looking up at him, tired.

"I'm so glad it's over," she muttered against his shirt, sighing into him. Alex smiled.

"Not a big fan of birthday parties?" he asked her.

"Not a big fan of people trying to break us apart," she gave him a pointed look, waving him in the right direction. Alex nodded, smilingly.

"Oh, that. Yeah, me too," he agreed. Alex entangled his hand from hers when they had reached his car, meaning to get in, when Jo tightened her grip on him, pushed him against the car carefully and reached up to kiss him, hungrily. Alex reciprocated immediately, not even thinking about how publicly they were acting on their respective passion. Jo felt overwhelmed, feeling like her knees would give out any second now, her skin prickling from the sensation of kissing Alex, so deeply, so sensually. His lips tasted like Champaign, as did hers probably, and his tongue explored her mouth without shame. She could feel his hands pressed up against her lower back, pushing her body flush with his. Her hands were acting on their own accord, she couldn't control them, sensations of their bodies overwhelming her. They trailed up his chest, feeling his erect nipples underneath the sheer fabric of his shirt, putting some pressure on her fingers when she slid her hands up his neck towards his ear, intertwining them on top of his head before scratching them down again, kneading her fingers in his soft short hair. When Alex pushed his leg between hers teasingly, her hands dropped to his face, cupping his head and her breathing hitched within their kiss.

"Uh," she could hear her own voice chuck out unconsciously, her mouth wide open in a silent moan. Alex smiled when she started breathing a little heavier, closing her widely gaping mouth and looked at him through hooded eyes, gritting her teeth. He chuckled, seeing her narrowing her eyes and trying to shape reprimanding words and decided to reach his arm around her waist underneath her overcoat and pull her even closer.

"You like that, huh?" he brought his mouth to her ear, whispering in a husky voice, before placing kisses down her neck, making her close her eyes again.

"Can we…," she trailed off when he started to suck on her. "Can we just get into the car and drive home…or somewhere…," Jo's voice was small and he could hear a shiver run through her while saying it. He nodded, pulling her up to kiss her again, fully on the lips, making her moan.

"I missed you," Alex told her. He could feel how Jo scrunched up her face within the kiss and tried to say something.

"I didn't go anywhere…," she responded in confusion.

"I know," he breathed, running his thumb across her cheek. "But I missed the feeling of having you…," he tried to explain.

"I don't understand," she looked up at him, puzzled. "You _had _me…for a lack of a better word…all along," she pointed out. Alex shook his head slightly.

"No…it didn't feel like it… it felt like they took you away from me… and with you signing the stupid paper… now I feel good again. I feel right again," he informed her, initiating another soft peck. She smiled at him.

"Weirdly, I felt the same way a couple of minutes ago in there," she pointed her head over towards the restaurant, making him smile. They kissed again, softly, lingering though.

"You know, just because you can't do it at the hospital, doesn't mean you need to do it anywhere but," they got interrupted by a dismissive sounding voice, making them break the kiss and looking over at their roommate, walking towards her car. She looked something in between amused and actually understanding… when Jo turned her head an inch further, she froze and narrowed her eyes.

"Really?" she couldn't help but yelp upon seeing the chief who looked very uncomfortable as well. She shook her head and laughed evilly.

"We won't mind you, you won't mind us, alright?" Yang told her matter-of-factly, trying to keep the cool in between them.

"Come on, Jo," Alex tugged at her fingers, trying to make her calm but she was livid.

"You know, since I'm off right now and there's so many reasons why you can't punish me for what I'm about to say since you give me enough fuel to turn you in as well, let me say this: I was already thinking you were hypocrites, but this… _this_ makes me sick to my stomach. And the weird thing is… I'm happy for you guys. I am. I don't care you're still doing it even though you're not married. I don't care. And of course, maybe it's different for you…cause I am just a stupid resident…but Alex? Really? He's your friend," she directed that last part at Cristina. "So, no, for right now, you lost all my respect," she said, frantically, making Owen look embarrassed. Jo turned back towards Alex who had raised his eyebrows, watching the scene. "Where is it?" she asked him in a whisper, tapping his chest impatiently before Alex retrieved it from his pocket. She took it out of his hands, unfolded it and thrust it into the chief's chest. "Consider this our marriage license," she glared at him, before rounding the car and getting inside, leaving a much surprised looking Cristina, Owen and Alex.

"What is it?"

"It's a form that officially states that we may be with each other, even at work," Alex told him soberly, making the chief nod slowly, looking up apologetically. "Good night," he said, already opening up the door to the driver's seat.

"Alex," Owen called him back hesitantly. Alex just yanked his head around and looked at him with an iron gaze.

"It's over now, Hunt. We can all forget about it and I'd appreciate it, if you stop butting into my private life," he said, trying to at least mend fences. "Oh, and… between us all… don't you dare punish Jo for what she said," he advised him, making Owen shake his head.

"I won't," he said.

"Good. Cause you know she was right," Alex told him matter-of-factly. They stared at each other before Alex climbed into the car and started the engine.

"You didn't have to blow up on him again, you know," Jo told him gently, reaching over to place her hand on his thigh. Alex just shrugged.

"It's fine. I think we just ended that whole story. I'm not mad anymore, I'm not. I just wanted to tell them that they had no business fighting anymore, either," he said. Jo nodded, looking out the window, watching everything fly by. All of a sudden, she gasped and it sounded like she got startled by something.

"What? What is it?" Alex tried to find out frantically.

"Are they going over to your house as well?!" Jo looked at him wide-eyed. Alex snorted.

"I promise, I'll throw them out. Tonight is our night. We'll get the house to ourselves," he winked at her, entwining their fingers.

"Good. I have lots of ideas how to relax from this last few weeks," she smiled at him sweetly. Alex wriggled his eyebrows at her and Jo watched his genuinely smooth and unbothered face. Now, she could finally have that thought without feeling the ulcer grow in her stomach: _They were going to be okay._


	16. 10x18

_[10x18]_

Jo looked over at Alex doing his little wiggle dance, raising her eyebrows and tried to hide a chuckle. "Why are you in such a good mood?" she asked him from the side. Alex just kept on wiggling and humming, sporting a super charming smile at her before dancing over and smacking his lips against hers, making her look even more surprised, shaking her head at him questioningly, getting infected by his extraordinarily good mood.

"I don't know…maybe things just pick up for me at last," he told her, immediately going back to chucking out his melodic syllables and bending down to sign the check Jo had already filled in for him. When he straightened up, he clicked his pen noisily before carefully tugging it away in his bag. "Come on, we've been talking about catching up on _Breaking Bad _in forever," he took her hand, trying to pull her along.

"Wait a minute, I'm almost done," Jo flicked his fingers away from her wrist, going back to writing.

"Oh, you spoilsport, come on, you can finish that later," he grumbled.

"You surely are not gonna do it so just sit tight for a second and let me finish," Jo gave him a pointed look, making him roll his eyes. He watched her scribble for a while, before leaning down and kissing her neck teasingly, moving upwards and biting her earlobe slightly. "Oh come on, see it's just one more," she reprimanded him, trying for him to stop his advances. Alex just laughed into her hair and kept going, moving to her cheeks and then unceremoniously turning her head to kiss her lips. Jo pulled away, narrowing her eyes at him before determinedly looking back down at the stuff she was working at but couldn't help let a smile flit across her lips when he didn't let himself be rejected and just made his way over towards her neck again. Jo had brought up her left arm and held onto his back casually. A moment later she dropped the pen noisily, looking up at him. "See, done!" she laughed when he only wriggled his eyebrows at her and leaned down to match both their widely smiling lips. They smacked apart and Alex tugged her out of her seat to pull her after him. Jo barely got a hand on the bowl of popcorn, trailing after Alex who was still holding onto the hand she had rested on his waist a minute ago, making her walk behind him all the way down to the living room. Alex dropped on the couch immediately while Jo placed the bowl on the coffee table and got out a blanket from the closet.

"I did my first anoplasty today," he informed her, sounding pleased.

"Yeah? How did it go?" Jo asked him interestedly, fighting with getting out the blanket from underneath other crap that has been piling on in there.

"Pretty good. The doctor… Oliver Lebackes… he has a private practice and all… he runs a _pretty _debatable OR," he pointed out.

"What do you mean?" she asked when she walked over and sat down on the couch as well, covering herself up with the blanket.

"I don't know… Robbins actually really liked it, it seemed. Music was blaring through the entire OR and everybody was _dancing_," Alex said as if disgusted by it and rolled his eyes, making her smile.

"I actually heard about that. People were talking," she said, scooting a little closer, Alex stretching out his arm to put it around her shoulders. She bent forwards to retrieve the remote, making Alex immediately stroke up her back, watching her closely, trying to think about what to say next.

"I'm pretty out of practice playing golf," he decided to smooth into it slowly. When Jo sat up, she scrunched up her face at him, shaking her head.

"What?"

"We played some golf on his _Wii_ in his stupid amazing office today," Alex responded lazily. Jo looked up from the screen, while trying to get to where they had last left off with watching the show.

"When did you have the time today to go play _Wii_ in that guy's office?" she looked baffled. Alex just shrugged.

"He invited me over after the surgery," he said. "It was interesting," he added.

"Since when do you care about private practice doctors?" she turned towards him when she was done with the settings. Alex shrugged again.

"Don't know… you know he actually said… they're looking to enlarge their place… he said… I'd maybe make a good fit…," he inched forwards, not knowing what to expect in her reaction. Jo's eyebrows hiked.

"Are you considering working for them?"

"Well…I don't know… no. I mean, yes… maybe?" he looked up at her face for reassurance.

"Okay… how did we get here? I mean… what happened?"

"Look, you were right today…. I do like to push things out… and I'm pretty behind with paying off my student loans… I just… with everything I have to pay… I thought it could wait…or something. It's just… even if I stay and they take me on as an attending… or even if I get a really good offer from somewhere else… I doubt I'll ever make enough money to… I don't know… I just thought that it is an incredible opportunity, you know? Him actually drawing my attention to this spot… and thinking I'd make a good fit. And I think I'd do really well… right? I mean… I love Peds… and this would be great," he rambled a bit. Jo looked at him in confusion.

"So, you _are _actually thinking of taking his offer?"

"Why? Do you think that's a stupid idea? I mean… yeah, it's probably stupid, right…," he drifted off, looking down.

"No," Jo shook her head intensely. "No, Alex, I'm just surprised, is all…," she explained her reaction. "I didn't know you'd wanna work in a private practice… you never seemed the type to… to want that… but if you really want that… I mean, that's great, it's awesome, really," she tried to show him her support.

"I don't know… what made you think I wasn't the guy?"

"Well, I don't know… you do all kinds of stuff at the hospital… I didn't think you'd wanna… spend all your time making artificial buttholes to be honest," she chuckled slightly, trying to make him look at her again. When he did, he bit his lips. "I remember you talking of having had an interest in plastics once… I just didn't know you… you were actually onto something," she said. Alex nodded.

"Have I ever told you about Africa?"

"As in the continent?" Jo raised her eyebrows, smiling at him teasingly. Alex rolled his eyes.

"I mean…our project…," he said.

"Yeah, of course. That's still running, right?" she asked him, concerned now.

"Yeah. The thing is… I mean it's awesome that it still is… and we're still flying them in… it's just… I kinda think that I wanna expand it a bit more… try to… you know… take that chance of an already existing project and make something even greater of it… something beneficial for even more kids and families…?" he explained.

"Okay? I think I just got lost… we went from buttholes to Africa… tell me what you're getting at, please?" she smiled at him.

"I'm just thinking… with going into a private practice… there's all sorts of advantages. I'd make a crap load of money, benefits are amazing, I'd have a lot more time, I run my own schedule… I'd have the money and resources and _time _to make something like an expansion on the Africa front happening…," he told her timidly.

"Oh, wow, okay… you're reaching for the stars," she widened her eyes and mocked him a little. Alex sighed.

"Alright…maybe I did go a bit far… I just…I don't know," he tried to get to a decision point.

"No, Alex, that all sounds great. It really does. I'm just saying I didn't know until now that you wanted something like this. If you do, this is an amazing opportunity, and you're right. You'd probably have a way bigger chance to achieve something with already having a high-ranking position in the private medicine business… and if you're actually planning to do something like Africa… I mean that'd be the dream, right?" Jo adjusted her reaction from before. Alex looked at her insecurely.

"You really think so?"

"I do, Alex, I really do," she said, snuggling a bit closer. "It's just weird to think about… I mean I _just _started out, you know… and you are already…making a career…I mean you've been doing that I know… it's just… I'm trying to somehow make it through residency and you are… you are making huge decisions that I can't even digest yet… it's really weird," she said. Alex nodded.

"I kinda feel the same way," he chuckled. "I _just _started my internship, I swear… I feel in no way comfortable making big decisions like that…," he admitted. Jo smiled.

"You are all grown up now it seems," she kissed his chest.

"Ughhh," he groaned, stretching out his legs. "Let's watch Walt. He has way more drastic decision-making to do than I do," he said, making her chuckle. Jo reached for the popcorn, placing it in Alex's lap before making herself comfortable and hitting the play button, anticipating the next episode. "How are you keeping up with _your_ student loans? I mean… you seem so… settled with everything," Alex spoke up again, making her look up in surprise. She shrugged.

"I just started paying them off from the beginning. That's what the financial plans they give you are for," she teased him lightly.

"So, you didn't use to be a lingerie model or something?" Alex narrowed his eyes at her. Jo hit pause and frowned.

"What? Why?" she asked completely taken aback by that question. Alex shook his head, laughing humorlessly.

"Nothing, it's fine. Just wanted to check," he told her, motioning for her to play it again.

"Are you sure you're okay? You are acting pretty odd tonight," she told him. Alex laughed.

"Nah, it's fine. I just don't feel like sharing your gorgeousness with half of the guys in this country," he told her, winking. Jo let her head fall to the side and smiled, shaking her head.

"You're an idiot, you know that?"

"Yeah, you keep telling me that, no worries, I won't forget," he told her, smiling as well.

"Come here," she reached out her hand and cupped his cheek, moving his face down to kiss him. "I don't know what's going on in your mind sometimes…," she murmured against his lips. "But let me tell you one thing," she kissed him again. "I will support anything you decide to do, alright? I think it's great that you're keeping open-minded about career opportunities. You'd surely be an awesome fit. And I'm not just saying that because I will wring you for your money," he smiled against her lips. "But I'll tell you as well that you'll be very much missed at the hospital. Not only by me. Even though I think I'll miss you the very most. Yeah, I'm pretty sure about it. Let's say, I _know_," she rambled on before deepening the kiss.

"Thanks, babe," he muttered when they broke apart and Jo nestled in the crook of his neck, having closed her eyes and enjoying his caresses. "I'm glad you think I'm superman," he said, chuckling.

"You kinda are, to me," she pulled her head back to smile at him.

"Did you know they call me _boy wonder _at the hospital?" he all of a sudden remembered. Jo laughed.

"Yeah, they always have," she told him, amused by his disgruntled face. She leaned in to whisper into his ear. "Took forever to convince me it wasn't because of your… ," Jo cleared her throat theatrically, "Physical skills," she said, laughing. "And when I actually started believing it, you started sleeping with me and again, I was unsettled if they really called you that because of your medical skills...," she pondered mockingly, laughing.

"Why didn't you tell me that?" he questioned her, scandalized.

"Oh, well, there's a lot you hot shot attendings don't know," she winked at him. Alex scowled. "Come on, let's watch this episode. I think we should save some time for later," she winked and cuddled into his side again, hitting the play button and smiling contently. "Maybe _boy wonder _has been gifted with more than one specialty," she told him teasingly, kissing his chest again to soothe him.

"Yeah, whatever, _hairball_," Alex said, tightening his grip on her. _Maybe he was gifted. Maybe this was his chance. Maybe he should really consider taking this chance. _Alex sighed. _At least Jo seemed to think he would be able to pull it off. _He looked over at her and sighed. _How did I do all this __without you, seriously?_


	17. 10x19

[10x19]

Alex closed the door behind him, putting the keys down and looked around. The house seemed dark and quiet. He walked over to the kitchen, finding it empty. When he saw the full bottle of Champaign Meredith had cooled for them earlier this morning in the fridge, he knew Cristina had to still be out. He walked upstairs, trying to think this day through. It had been a good day, Jo had been right. There were successes all around. Braden was fine despite him running around the hospital, Alex had made it happen for him to stay in touch with his friends on Peds. Jo had seemed exuberantly happy about her day. Cristina had been nominated _and _she had managed to find a way to keep Link McNeill alive for the time being. He had called Lebackes. Alex intentionally placed this one last on his list. He felt some jitters in his guts when thinking about it. Everything was going so good at the hospital, why leave, right? He didn't know what would await him… he didn't know what they would demand from him once working for them… maybe he should have thought about it a while longer. Alex slowly made his way over towards their bedroom, pondering. But then again, he had just called and told them he was interested, right? That was good. It was a good thing! He was happy about taking that step. He'd never know otherwise. This way he at least got to see what they offered. It had been a happy day.

Alex opened up the bedroom door, finding it illuminated by their bedside lamps but empty. The door towards the bathroom was open and he walked over to find Jo leaning against the sink and focusing on her nails, filing them. He unceremoniously walked in, making her look up at him, and turned on the water in the shower. He walked over towards her and stilled her movements, taking the file out of her hands.

"I wasn't done with this," she protested mildly, frowning.

"Shower," Alex whispered back, bending down and kissing her.

"Okay," she gave him back softly, cause really she didn't mind him interrupting her for that. Their kiss was gentle and luring, like it held a promise of something. Jo looked up at him like a shy deer when he broke the kiss and fumbled to take her shirt off, instantly going down to her neck, placing light kisses on her. Jo purred. Nothing like coming home to this. _But why was he being so…hesitant? So careful with everything? _Jo played with the hem of his jeans while Alex kept spoiling her with kisses to her cleavage, opening up her bra and hanging it on the door handle before swinging it close. By now, the room was filled with hot steam from the shower and both of them had gone into a state of trance. Alex worked to get Jo's jeans off of her and immediately let her panties drop after. Jo had now brought up her hands to his chest and roamed upwards, searching for his lips. They momentarily matched their lips but almost felt like they couldn't kiss properly since they were both being so timid, acting so soft. Alex broke the kiss, staring at her eyes while getting his shirt off and unbuttoning his jeans, Jo watching him with longing in her eyes, with the shimmer of appreciation, appreciation of his beauty, of the beauty of this situation. She gave him a small smile. When Alex had dropped his boxers, he motioned for her to get in, watching how she instantly stretched her head towards the stream, letting the warm water engulf her. This was a happy day. All he could think was, he had never seen such beauty, and he got to see it every day and every night.

He stepped in behind her, closing the glass sliding doors and did the very same motions, letting the sprinkle engulf him. He put his hands on her shoulders, smoothing them across them, putting some pressure on her tense neck muscles, making her sigh in pleasure. He swooped down to kiss her shoulder blade and ran his hands further down her arms before moving them over to her sides, caressing them.

"Tell me about your day," he murmured into her ear, reaching over and starting to soap her in, going from her shoulders to her back, lower down before reaching his hands through to her front and massaged her abdomen and sides. There was a pause between his instruction and her replying to him, in which Jo just reveled in the feeling of his hands on her body.

"I already told you most of it," she breathed out eventually.

"Was it a good day?" he asked her, making her nod in return and smile slightly.

"It was pretty awesome. I think I really like Ortho. It makes me super happy, even Shepherd's robot told so," she leaned her head over for him to kiss her neck.

"That's good. I'm glad you find yourself happy with what you do," he whispered, moving his hands up to rub her boobs, making her sigh.

"Where's this coming from? Are you having doubts about the practice job?" she asked him, half concerned.

"No. Not really. I haven't even gone there yet. It'll be fine. I was just thinking," he responded lazily, still in his soft voice, "today was a really good day, right?"

"It was," Jo smiled. She turned round in his arms and took the soap out of his hands, starting to smooth her hands over his chest slowly, looking up at him piercingly. "And I'm really happy I got to share it with you for parts of it," she said quietly, moving her hands over his rock hard abs, caressing his sides and lower back, slowly going down and circling his butt.

"Maybe in a couple of years timing I will be the one to whip out my credit card and let you book a private jet onto it," he smiled lazily for the first time. Jo's face widened.

"That was a bit over the top," she remarked. "But I'm so glad he did. See, that's why I like working at that hospital. It's like… I feel like with everybody being so close…and the hospital actually being 'run by doctors'… we can do stuff like that… if it had gone as protocol suggests…Yang would have never made that save. It's soothing to think that there are more than a couple of options out there. If those two have been exhausted…there's still something you can do. I love that," she aspirated. Alex nodded, absently, and they kept soaping each other gently, silence engulfing them, both kept in their trance.

It was Jo who first broke the spell and smoothed her hands down towards his erection that had been slowly building, embracing him with her small fingers, gently rubbing on him. She looked up at Alex who sighed heavily, looking at her through hooded eyes. She brought her left arm up and hugged him to her, kissing his shoulder, while running her fingertips down to his balls, cupping them cautiously, leaving him shudder in her embrace before running them up again on his sensitive backside, making him hiss into her shoulder where he had placed his head. Jo's head was spinning. Alex had long started to rub his fingers across her nipples, twirling them, twitching them, making her crave for more, making her whole body tremble with how deep desire spread out within her. She let go of his erection and moved both her arms up to wrap them around him, kissing him deeply when she couldn't take it anymore. Alex was immediately intrigued by her closeness and pushed her body into the tiles, both of them moaning at the close contact. His fingers snaked down between her legs and slowly smoothed over her spot, capturing another low moan from her before entering her with his fingers, making her head swirl with the masterful movements he did.

"Baby, now," she hissed at him, and he followed her orders dutifully. He grabbed her butt tightly, heaving her up to the small ledge, cleaning it off roughly from all the shampoos and crap that were gathering there and pulled her closer, looking at her with lusting eyes. She grabbed his head and tugged him forward to kiss him deeply. Meanwhile, she could feel how Alex fumbled for his penis and gave himself an entrance. They looked at each other shortly, before Jo leaned forwards and slid down on him, sucking in a breath and biting down on his shoulder.

"You're so beautiful," Alex whispered into her ear, making her smile. "Any day is a happy day with you. I don't need anything else," he said, pulling her closer and starting to move. Nothing that got them both high like this. Nothing they'd want to exchange for this. Just having a good day together. Is all they needed.


	18. 10x20

[10x20]

Jo looked at Alex and laughed. "Maybe you should squeeze in a little powernap before going over to the practice, hm?" she squeezed his thighs and smiled.

"Nah, I'm totally awake," Alex said, yanking his eyes open even wider, trying to hide a yawn.

"U-huh," Jo nodded mockingly. "You sure the kids you'll be working with will be safe under your supervision?" she wriggled her eyebrows at him.

"I'll just get a coffee before going out," he waved her away.

"Well, what about me? Now, I have to worry that you'll be running your car off the road with those eyes that won't keep open," she teased him. Alex had just shaped his snappy reply when his phone rang and he sighed heavily upon seeing who was screaming for him.

"Yeah, yeah I'm coming," he said before picking up the phone, putting on an extra cheerful voice and smiling, making Jo yank her head back. "Hi Jenna," he greeted the caller. "I'm on my way over right now, I'll be there in no time, I promise," he sounded into his phone.

"_Oh, no, Dr. Karev, that's a shame, I was just going to tell you we were having a really slow morning because there was this bus crash on 99. You should have taken the time off, you're working so hard," _the older lady told him. Alex sighed.

"Oh, alright, well, thanks for calling. I'll see you tomorrow then," he said, hanging up.

"What's up?" Jo scrunched up her face.

"They don't need me to come in. There was a bus crash on 99, so they had a lot of last minute cancellations," he told her lazily.

"Well, that's good, isn't it? Why do you looked pissed?"

"Because a bus crash on 99 means we will need all hands on deck downstairs," Alex groaned, rubbing his face.

"You're officially off duty," Jo told him matter-of-factly, pushing his chest a bit. "And we're going to sleep," she directed him.

"No, they surely need us," he protested weekly, letting her push him further and align him to the bed frame, getting in besides him.

"We both did the nightshift. Right now, other people are being called. We'll see if they still need anything later. And anyways, I mean I'd probably be halfway okay but you cannot run through the ER like this," she told him, resting her head on the arm Alex had put out, looking at him lying on her side.

"I'm so tired," Alex yawned all of a sudden before turning to face her and reached over to pull her closer. Jo smiled, stroking the side of his head gently, kissing his face.

"Well, supermen get tired too sometimes," she told him in a whisper, before kissing his lips, making him nod.

"Not so sexy anymore, huh?" he muttered, already on his way to deep sleep.

"Vastly sexy, babe, trust me," she murmured into his ears, making him smile slightly. Jo watched him sleep for a while, pondering. That night had been long. She had done well and she had learned a lot with Shepherd but she really wished she could have just gone home. But then again, she had been in a pretty awesome surgery _and _now she was lying in bed with Alex, it couldn't have worked out much better. She smiled when Alex still wriggled her a little closer in his sleep. It didn't take long for her to fall asleep in his arms. It was blissful, dreamless. Deeply restful. Jo woke hearing the vibrations of Alex's phone, turning around to retrieve it. She looked at it, since it hadn't stopped for a while she thought. Nobody was calling though. Jo usually wasn't the type to look through someone else's messages but Jo couldn't help but noticing the words of Meredith Grey. _He had told her? Wow, she wouldn't have thought. At least, the last time they talked, he was saying nobody can know. _Jo put down the phone again, turning towards Alex and slinging her leg across his folded ones. He immediately reciprocated and shifted his body so that his left leg lay in between both of hers.

"Why you up? Issid lade already?" Alex's hot breath tickled her face when he breathed out the sleepy questions.

"No, no, go back to sleep. Your phone irritated me," she informed him quickly.

"Why? Did anybody call?" Alex actually tried to get up, but Jo held him back down.

"No, baby, just go back to sleep. It was Grey. She told you a piece of her mind about the private practice thing," Jo said. Alex squeezed one eye shut, even though it already was and tried to open up the other one to blink dazedly at her.

"She did? What'd she say?"

"I don't know, Alex, I didn't read it. It just said _Oh and about that butthole job…_on the screen," she recounted for him. Alex nodded before cuddling closer, making her smile again.

"Alright, I'll shut up," he smiled against her chest.

"I kinda feel like I'm too tired to sleep," Jo started up talking again after a while of staring at the wall, drawing shapes on his back.

"Just close your eyes," Alex mumbled. "It's easy," was all the advice he could give her.

"You know, do you think now that we signed that stupid contract… do you think we can actually take a night off or something…together…you know, like Robbins and Torres?" she pondered on.

"_You _can't do anything. You are the second layer of the bottom of the surgical food chain," he rasped out, obviously trying to get to sleep. "You need to take your boards first and get picked up as an attending around here to get a say on your schedule," he added, making her sigh and run her fingers through his hair.

"I totally want this and all… I just… sometimes I get so sick of it," she confessed to him.

"It'll be over sooner than you think, I promise," he tried to soothe her, even though Jo could clearly hear that he was on the verge of dozing off and she had to smiled down at him, kiss his head.

"Speaking of which. You really need to tell Robbins. Come on, it's not fair, they gotta replace you," she urged him.

"I don't want them to replace me," he grumbled, making her chuckle and close her eyes.

"You are irreplaceable, baby, you are," she laughed into his hair.

"Well, at least they got their date night last night, so she'll hopefully be in a better mood and I'll have an easier job to do," he pointed out.

"Oh, they didn't get their date night," Jo informed him.

"What, why? Did they come back to the hospital?"

"No, no, Shepherd made them babysit his kids because he got snowed in with surgeries," she reported.

"How do you know that?"

"I spent all night with him," Jo murmured, yawning now herself.

"Shameless, woman! I knew you liked older men but really? Shepherd's like… 15 years older than you are," Alex ranted. Jo snorted, tapping his back forcefully.

"Ew, Alex, come on, that's just gross," she chided him. Alex chuckled into her chest. "It must be so hard to try to keep two careers going _and _work on a marriage, _and _have two kids to care for. I can't even imagine what they're going through on a daily basis. You know, I mean, I just… I work my ass off and then when I'm done I go home and sleep or have a beer or be with you…but you know, with them… the day's only beginning when they come home from work," Jo rambled on, making Alex frown.

"What are you saying?" Jo looked down at him in confusion.

"Um, nothing, I'm just saying it must be really hard," she responded. Alex narrowed his eyes at her.

"You're not trying to tell me you're pregnant or something?" Jo raised her eyebrows and shook her head in shock. She had not expected that subject to come up any time soon.

"Um, no," she chuckled, frowning down at him as well.

"You sure?" Alex reassured himself again.

"I'm positive," Jo answered slowly, nodding her head lazily.

"Okay," he smiled again, burying his head in her chest once again. "That would make me a _triple agent _and I do not know if I'd be able to pull that one," he added, yawning. Jo smiled.

"I actually bet you would. Remember, you're a superhero," she mumbled into his ear before kissing his cheek.

"Turn over," Alex finally muttered, making her chuckle.

"Noo," she tried to protest shortly, in a very whiny voice.

"You know you're always too distracted to go to sleep when you look at me," Alex said, making it sound extra narcisstic, making her laugh but turning over in his embrace and snuggling against his broad frame, his arms immediately snapping around her, holding her tight, kissing her shoulder and neck. "Sleep tight, princess," he muttered, exhaling deeply.

"And with that you mean shut up, don't you?"

"Pretty much, yep," he laughed and kissed her between her shoulder blades, tightening his grip. Jo smiled contently as they entwined their fingers and both fell asleep in a matter of seconds.


	19. 10x21

[10x21]

_I'm going to publish two of my one-shots for this episode. Here's #1._

* * *

><p>"I love you."<p>

"I love you, too. Baby."

* * *

><p><em>Here's #2<em>

* * *

><p>"How are you feeling now?" Jo murmured into the kiss, swaying within Alex's embrace.<p>

"Pretty damn awesome," Alex smirked, making Jo nod and chuckle. She pulled herself impossibly closer and deepened the kiss, indulging in the rush of endorphins Alex was pouring onto her. The kiss quickly went off course and Jo's head swirled with the lack of oxygen and the feeling of her knees giving away. She leaned her elbows onto Alex's shoulders and rooted her fingers into his hair for support. Alex immediately realized and pushed her over towards the island, picking her up as if she didn't even weigh an ounce and placed her on the counter, settling in between her legs. After a moment, Jo broke the kiss for air, leaning her forehead against him.

"How are you feeling now?" she smiled at him playfully, trying to get her breathing under control.

"Turned on," Alex wriggled his eyebrows at her, swooping down slowly and kissing her neck. Jo chuckled.

"Good, I have all sorts of plans for you tonight," she enlightened him, tightening her legs around him.

"Oh, really," Alex breathed, sucking on a spot above her collarbone. There was an unanticipated pause and after a moment Alex looked up at Jo's face, giving her a questioning look. "What is it?"

"You have a new job, Alex," she told him disbelievingly. Alex croaked out a laugh.

"No kidding," he nodded, smirking at her teasingly.

"As in, you're leaving the hospital," she mused. Alex nodded, watching her inspirations warily. "You know I'm not sure if I'm ready for that," she all of a sudden proclaimed. Alex frowned.

"What do you mean?"

"I won't ever get to see you," she pointed out.

"I'll have lots of time, I run my own schedule," Alex smiled a huge smile and pecked her lips again.

"Yeah but I don't, Alex! I'm still a resident. I mean, yeah, we see each other at home but sometimes not even that happens. Sometimes the hospital is the only place I get to see you," she sounded a tiny bit frantic.

"I'll be over there lots of times," Alex tried to soothe her.

"It won't be the same," Jo defended her thoughts. Alex rolled his eyes.

"You're right. It won't be the same. That's the point of a new job in a different institution," he nodded at her slowly, trying to make her see. "What's your problem all of a sudden?"

"Did you ever ask my opinion on all this?" Jo looked at him puzzled. Alex had to laugh. She was being so adorable and didn't even realize.

"Come here," he told her, moving forwards and luring her into a hug. When her head rested besides his and he could hear her sigh into his ear, he smiled. "Why are you freaking out all of a sudden?"

"I'm not freaking out," Jo barked back gruffly.

"Yeah you are," Alex responded. "I'm the one doing changes and you are all weird all of a sudden," he said.

"I'm not _weird_," she raised her voice a bit. "I'm just gonna miss you," she added meekly. Alex inched his head to the right and gave her a tiny smile.

"I'm not out of this world, Jo," he laughed. "This is so not you, what's wrong with you?" Jo shrugged at him.

"I mean it. Sometimes I never get to see you. Just….," she tried to voice. "Promise you won't forget about me," she asked him, a small blush rising in her cheeks.

"Forget about you?" Alex inquired, laughing, pushing himself away from the counter and going over to the fridge, retrieving two bottles of beer. "How in the world am I supposed to do that?"

"Well, I don't know…maybe there are some really hot lady patients over there. Or you know… doctors. Or nurses. Or assistants. What do I know?"

"Are you being jealous for no good reason?" Alex teased her, pushing the opened bottle of beer into her hand.

"No," Jo told him with a scrunched up face. "Yes, of course," she added, making him grunt with laughter.

"I like it. Don't overdo it, though. Don't go all crazy ass bitch on my new colleagues, alright?"

"I'll have to see about that. I'll have to go check them out some day," she winked at him. They both had a sip of their beers, looking at each other.

"You're happy for me, though, right?" Alex asked her after a minute, sounding insecure.

"Do you want me to repeat my reaction from before or is there anything else that I can show or tell you that will make you feel reassured?" Jo asked him with a hint of teasing in her voice. Alex grinned but still looked down.

"Reaction from before is fine," he mumbled, actually meaning that he had understood she was happy for him.

"Alrighty, then," Jo put down her beer next to her on the counter and slid down, faking a run-up towards him which turned out to be only a four foot straight line to the opposite counter and threw her arms around him in slow motion, kissing him deeply. Alex laughed against her lips, surprised. For the second time this evening, he wrapped his arms around her tightly and just reveled in their affection towards each other. When they broke, Jo beamed up at him. "So, what's it gonna be about my messed up shoes?" her eyes glimmered when she stated it. Alex chuckled.

"Throw them out and take your old ones," he suggested unfazed.

"No, I threw them out a month ago," she gave him back.

"No, you didn't," he countered, shaking his head.

"Sure I did," she wouldn't let herself be enlightened.

"No, you told me to throw them out on my way out to the backyard," he told her.

"So?"

"Well," Alex shrugged. "I never did," he pointed out to her, making her give him a scandalized glare.

"Why?" Alex made a face.

"You know, I really do love you…but there's not gonna be a life in which I'm gonna touch your revoltingly smelly old shoes," he told her, followed by a chuckle. Jo put her head to the side.

"So, you're saying I should be wearing those revoltingly smelly old shoes and when I come home from work we'll do it straightaway, on the couch, having missed you so badly all day that I can't even change my socks and have a shower?" she glinted at him. Alex rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"_Until _you have new ones, I meant to say, you will have to wear those," he clarified.

"U-huh," she smiled at him. "And who's gonna buy me those new ones?" she smiled at him innocently, making him smile as well and look to the side, shaking her head about her cheeky behavior.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," he waved the thought away before they smiled at each other brightly and swooped down to deepen that kiss from before.


	20. 10x22

[10x22]

"I'mona go home," Leah slurred, half falling from her bar stool and wrestling with her jacket. Alex sighed in exasperation.

"You know what, I'll call you a cab," Alex decided, getting out his phone. He moved a couple of inches backwards when the resident stumbled his way and came dangerously close, swaying in front of him, trying to put together syllables.

"You know what, Dr. _Kareeev," _Leah told him, her eyes rolling dangerously, all eyes on them. "I don't need you to do _any_thing for me anymore," she gave back to him, making him raise his eyebrows at her. Shane got up quickly and guided Leah away from him.

"It's okay, I'll take her home," he announced, sounding indifferent. Alex nodded while watching them dipsy-doodling out of the bar. He looked over at Jo when she had bent forwards and put her index finger on his forearm that was resting on the counter and looked at him amusedly.

"You really shouldn't have slept with the entire hospital, now they won't even let you help them," she told him matter-of-factly, even though it sounded ridiculous with her being beyond drunk, ending her advice in a chuckle, making Stephanie who still sat beside her snort. Alex put his face into his palms, sighing. He had been listening to their crap all night long and all he had wanted to do is maybe have one drink and then go home with Jo but she insisted on drinking another beer and another and another and wallowing in self-pity, just like all the other residents besides her.

"You know," Stephanie gurgled out, laughing. "I didn't sleep with your boyfriend," she pointed out, just as wasted. "I only slept with the head of the hospital. And it got me _nowhere_," she burst out in another fit of giggles. Jo put an arm around Stephanie amicably, adopting a content smile on her face.

"And that's why you are my _best _friend here, Steph. It's hard to find a friend around here that hasn't slept with _him_," she pointed him out with her index again, narrowing her eyes at him. Alex groaned in frustration but got interrupted when Meredith and Cristina stepped inside the bar and looked for some space.

"Dr. _Yaaang_," Jo immediately cried out, having seen Alex's face turn towards them. "We missed you _terribly _while you were gone," she yelled out exaggeratedly, her drunken voice making everyone cringe. Cristina and Meredith had both stopped mid-step on their way over to the bar and stared at the resident. Jo hadn't noticed and just petted the seat beside her that had once been occupied by Shane. "Come, come, sit with me, I wanna hear _aaaall _about Zurich," she smiled at her. Almost synchronically, both Mer and Cristina's heads swayed over to give Alex a puzzled look, but he just shrugged them off and motioned for them to sit with him desperately.

"What the hell's wrong with your girlfriend?" Cristina murmured when they walked closer.

"She thinks she's gonna get fired," Jo told her with a wide smile, apparently not able to differentiate between emotions anymore. Or she just put on an act. Alex actually couldn't be sure anymore at this point in time.

"I'm not gonna sit myself beside her," Cristina instantly flung up her hands, looking at her in disgust. "If you want us to sit with you, you gotta scoot over next to her," she informed Alex, who sighed and moved around the corner to sit besides Jo, while the other two got comfortable sitting next to him. Jo momentarily changed her mood towards Alex and embraced him with her hands fiercely, almost falling off her seat.

"My _boyfriend_," she called out, kissing his cheek. "Isn't he handsome?" she commented towards Joe who had just arrived to take Cristina and Mer's orders and now looked at Jo questioningly.

"I think this was your last order," he pointed at her half full beer. Jo frowned for a second before turning towards Alex again, instantly forgetting about her beer troubles.

"I'll still have you, right?" she asked him with a smile and blinked her eyes at him disturbingly. Alex looked at her and yanked his head back.

"God, you are sleeping on the couch tonight, your breath is phenomenal," he just remarked, trying to loosen her grip on him. Jo scrunched up her face for a second before turning over towards Meredith.

"Turns out we didn't need that stupid love contract after all, Dr. Grey," she told her informatively. "Since I'm getting fired I can do whatever I want. Whoever, I should say. I could screw the chief for what it's worth," she mused on, making them all look at her, disbelieving of her alcohol level. "Oh," she laughed all of a sudden. "No offense, Dr. Yang," she chuckled further, turning back towards Stephanie and engaging her in a conversation. Alex turned over towards his friends and sighed dramatically.

"Don't you think you should have taken her home five beers ago?" Cristina asked him.

"Don't you think I have tried that? She won't budge. And she's stubborn. And strong," he told them in exhaustion.

"You forgot lovable," Jo chimed in again, wriggling her eyebrows, but immediately going back to her and Steph's conversation.

"Seriously, she's creepy," Meredith pointed out. Alex nodded in agreement and there was an awkward pause. "Why does she think she's getting fired?" Meredith tried to inch closer.

"_All _residents think they're getting fired," Alex responded, making her look surprised.

"Well, I haven't heard anything about that. But let me just say, that's the least of our problems at the moment," she replied, making him roll his eyes.

"God knows where they've heard about it. Probably just some stupid intentional rumor to make them all work harder," he said. Jo turned around sharply and flicked the back of his head, making him wince and look at her in annoyance.

"_I _heard Hunt and Webber talk about how one resident was not cut out to be a surgeon," she informed them all. "So don't you go tell me I made that up. And, I'm glad you have so many problems on your schedule, Dr. Grey , and I totally understand if you don't care about one of us being fired, but I _do _care," she ranted, looking at them madly but at the same time realizing, she might have overstepped the line. "And you should, too," she whispered quietly, nudging Alex before turning back sheepishly. Alex shook his head and looked at them, desperate to change the subject.

"How was Zurich?" he tried to start the conversation. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Meredith smile part amusedly part sad, and he couldn't depict what that was supposed to mean.

"I… it was fantastic, actually," Cristina told him truthfully.

"Did you make them all beg for your attention, now that you're being a high profile surgeon?" he smiled at her amicably. Cristina hesitated slightly. "What?" he asked. When there was a longer pause, Meredith jumped in.

"Tell him who you met at that hospital," she smirked. Alex looked in between them, intrigued.

"I met Burke," she said with a sigh. Alex hiked his eyebrows.

"You kidding?" he chuckled voicelessly. "How did that go?"

"He wants to give me his hospital," she continued.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Well, he has built this institute, this magnificent research site, they have freaking forty–nine 3D printers, can you believe that? They do holograms of hearts in surgery," Cristina explained. "However, he wants to wind down a little, take himself back in benefit of his family," she looked over at him, their gazes burning into each other. "So, he was waiting for the right person to come along that he could trust with his hospital. And he chose me," Cristina concluded matter-of-factly. Alex stared at her, taken aback.

"But it's in Zurich," he said, a little surprised himself about the outcome of his speech. Meredith laughed voicelessly, succumbing to a sad smile.

"So, you're not even gonna ask me if I'm considering but you already assume I'll do it?" Cristina questioned him back.

"Of course you're gonna take it, have you listened to yourself," Alex gave her back dismissively, making Cristina look at him in surprise but then nod. They all sat in silence for a while. "Wow," Alex exclaimed after a moment. "That's _huge_," he said, making them nod again. The little chimes on the door sounded again, and in came Hunt, immediately steering towards Cristina. Jo and Stephanie instantly jumped a bit and looked at him fearfully. Hunt looked back at them weirdly before talking to Cristina and they paid and walked out together. Meredith followed a short while after, making Alex sit alone with Jo and Steph again.

"Did you see him stare at me?" Jo asked Steph desperately.

"No, you're wrong. He was staring at me," Stephanie whined with her.

"He wasn't staring at either of you, he was creeped out by _your_ stares," Alex finally put a foot down, making them startle. Jo hit his upper arm slightly, her lips a thin line.

"Keep your mouth shut if you don't have anything supportive to say," she told him.

"You know, snap at me all you want, you have to go home with me anyways," Alex rolled his eyes at her. Meanwhile Stephanie had gotten up and readied herself to leave. Jo looked at her desperately.

"No, don't go yet. We need to talk this through," Jo begged her.

"I think we've talked it through enough," Stephanie told her, trying to keep steady. "And we should probably not overdo it if we wanna show them tomorrow that we can kick ass if we want," she pointed out, making Alex chuckle. _Um, too late. _She waved at them and left, leaving the two of them sit together all alone. Jo turned towards the counter and let her head fall into her arms. Alex sighed.

"Let me take you home, come on," Alex murmured towards her, trying very hard not to blow up on her and be patient. Jo turned her head over to look at him. Alex reached out his arm and petted her back gently.

"What if they fire me, Alex?" she asked him, suddenly sounding very sober, very desperate, letting all her guard down.

"They're not gonna fire you," Alex shook his head, closing his eyes.

"That's not helping, Alex. You don't know that. You have no idea how much I messed up today. Hunt had to take my patient to surgery since I caused a bleeder. Robbins was so mad because I couldn't take care of a patient right away. I just… I screwed up so bad," she tried to make him see frantically.

"Jo, calm down. Robbins is just pissed that she has more on her plate now that I'm not there anymore. You can't do everything at once. She can't fire you for that. And you need to get a thicker a skin, there'll be lots of people during your residency that will get mad at you. And what goes for Hunt. Look, do you want me to tell you how many grave mistakes I made during my internship and residency? I screwed up all the time. The patient's alive, she's fine. They're not gonna fire you because you didn't call an attending. They yell at you because you're supposed to learn from your mistakes. This is a teaching program," Alex countered. Jo sighed.

"No," Jo shook her head. "No, no, you didn't see their faces. They hate me, I swear," she looked down at her hands.

"They don't hate you, I promise," Alex got up from his seat, finally taking matters in his own hands, taking Jo's light coat from her backrest and holding it out for her. "Come on, now, I'm tired," he urged her to get up, which she did, a little shakily though, and slipped her overcoat on. Alex paid for the drinks and guided his girlfriend outside, putting a tight arm around her, since she wasn't all steady on her feet anymore. Jo finally let herself fall into him and buried her face in the crook of his arm.

"What if they _do_, though, Alex? What if they do fire me?" she murmured in such a low voice, Alex barely noticed her talking. When he looked down, Jo met his gaze with wide, desperate eyes and he saw one single tear run down her cheek. He stopped mid-step, wiping away the tear with his thumb and sighed, pulling her into a full hug.

"Jo, listen to me, they won't fire you," he whispered into her hair. "I promise you, they won't fire you," he repeated.

"What if I got through all this…I got through every freaking year of my childhood, high school, college, med school, I got into this program, we got through the whole dating thing. What if we got through this whole 'what if they fire me because I wanna stay with you' and now they see that I'm just not made to be a surgeon? What if now they realized, I'm not as good as they want their people to be?" she pleaded with him in a small voice, more tears running down her cheeks, making his guts cringe, hurting for her.

"Jo, please, listen to me," he tried again.

"Because if they tell me that I'm not cut out for this… there isn't anything we can do… there isn't going to be an option…there isn't going to be a stupid sheet of paper that makes this go away," she sobbed heartbreakingly. Alex pulled her closer again, kissing the top of her head.

"You won't get fired, alright?" Alex told her sternly now, stressing every single word. "Do you trust me?" he asked her.

"With that or in general?"

"In general," he answered. She nodded again. "Okay. Then please, just trust me. I've been in this business long enough and I've been at this hospital long enough, working with those exact people long enough and I _know _they won't fire _you_," he said, pulling her back slightly and gave her a burning glare.

"Do you know anything about it?" she asked him, slightly hopeful.

"I don't know anything official. I don't know anything. The only thing I know is that they can't fire you. You're good, Jo. Stop doubting yourself," he told her, staring down at her as long as it took.

"You really think so?" she asked him in a whisper. Alex put his head to his side and smiled at her lovingly, tracing her cheekbone with his thumb and tucking back a lock.

"I do, Jo," he reassured her, making her nod eventually. She sighed, trying to steady herself and wiped the tears from her face. She looked up in surprise when Alex started talking again. "Don't ever make me sit with your whiny little friends again, make me pay and bitch at me for no good reason, understand?" he looked at her with a stern face now. Jo scrunched up her face, looking apologetic. She reached out for his tie and pulled him closer, shaking her head.

"I didn't mean to lash out on you, I'm sorry," she mumbled. Alex took her chin and made her look up at him.

"Okay," he accepted it and leaned down to kiss her.

"Thank you, Alex," she mumbled further, when he had put a protective arm around her again, guiding her towards the car. He just smiled and then yawned. "You kinda are an amazing boyfriend," she smiled at him cautiously.

"Oh, really," he rolled his eyes, opening the door for her and tucking her into the passenger seat. Jo nodded. "Even if I have slept with the _entire _hospital before you?" he teased her, looking at her with narrowed eyes.

"Sorry for that," Jo responded ruefully. Alex nodded, leaning in and pecking her lips softly once more. "I love you, you know that, right?" she added, holding onto his cheek.

"Yes, baby, I know that. Don't worry, it takes a lot more bitching for me to ditch you," he winked at her. Jo smiled and kissed him again. "But you're still sleeping on the couch," he said when breaking the kiss. "I'm not even sure I should be driving, I feel like you just poisoned me with the alcohol on your breath," he said, making her look at him like an innocent deer. Alex laughed and closed the door, rounding the car and sighing deeply, glad for this day to finally be over.


	21. 10x23

[10x23]

Jo drove her car up behind Alex's and put it in park. _Weird. _Upon getting out, she looked up at the house but it was dark. _Where the hell was he? _She walked up the front stairs in a pretty slow pace, exhausted from the day. She was actually as far as to not be able to make out what she was feeling anymore. She unlocked the door and entered, putting all her stuff inside the door and looked around the dark hallway. She took a few steps, immediately getting annoyed with someone having left everything lying around in the living room. She wasn't all obsessed with cleaning or something…. if she had to estimate herself on a scale she'd rather tend towards being a slob, but she hated it every time Yang or friends would stay over and don't clean up after themselves, so it got harder for her to even want to hang out in the living room, having to clean it up beforehand. She sighed, looking at a bowl of popcorn, beer, blankets. Not even the TV was fully switched off. Jo walked into the kitchen and got herself some water before walking back. When she climbed the first few steps of the stairway, she stopped and looked around to observe the scene again. Those two bottles of beer standing on the coffee table were closed. That bowl of popcorn was full. That blanket hadn't been touched. _Weird. _She walked further up towards their room, entering unceremoniously, instantly startling for not having anticipated Alex lying on the bed.

"Crap," she yelled out, her hand springing up to her chest in shock. "What are you doing?" Alex looked at her questioningly, shaking her head.

"What do you mean? It's my room," he pointed out, his voice definitely sounding irritated. Jo took a deep breath and put her stuff away, chuckling softly.

"No, you just scared me," she explained herself. "The entire house was dark."

"Where did you think I was?" he asked her, frowning.

"Well," Jo didn't exactly know how to say this without sounding too bitchy. "I'd have thought you'd be-," she stopped herself when she looked up at him, while still hovering somewhere in between the door and the bed. Jo's eyes went wide with realization. "Oh my goodness, Alex," she exclaimed, stepping closer towards him. "Were you asking me to have a beer together here? At home? In your text I mean," Jo asked him, feeling stupid.

"Um, yeah," Alex replied soberly, looking down at whatever he was reading.

"I was waiting at Joe's," she held her gaze steady, giving him a small sheepish smile and watched as his head snapped up again to look at her before he realized what had happened, too. He let out a small voiceless and humorless laugh. "Sorry," he mumbled. Jo laughed.

"Yeah, me too," she said, sitting herself on the edge of his side of the bed. "Were you trying to cold shoulder me in not even calling and asking where I was?" she winked at him.

"Um… no. Were you?" he asked her back.

"No, I had company," she reported to him, making him nod. There was a short pause.

"Good thing I wasn't there, then," Alex decided, making her smile and shake her head.

"I wanted you there," Jo gave him back.

"Well, and I wanted you here, let's get over it," Alex told her dismissively, going back to his reading. Jo nodded slowly, feeling a bit disappointed of that night.

"What are you working on?" she asked him tentatively.

"Some of Robbins' patients' histories," he just said, making her nod again, soberly, awaiting elaboration that never came. She got up after a while and walked towards the bathroom, sighing.

"You wouldn't believe the day I've had," she mumbled more to herself than to Alex, heating the water for her shower.

"Yeah, same here," he gave her back though, making her look back in surprise. "What are you doing?" he watched her through narrowed eyes.

"Taking a shower," she told him in a bored voice.

"Didn't you tell me you had already taken a shower after work?"

"Yeah," Jo sighed. "But I feel so gross," she admitted.

"Why?" Alex asked her, not understanding. Jo took off her shirt and turned around for him to see. "Whoa, what happened?" his eyes widened at her back. Jo sighed in frustration and turned back to face him unwillingly.

"Stress hives," she said. "They appeared over night, apparently your speech about believing in me and crap didn't work," she added, a small blush rising in her cheeks.

"Are you actually embarrassed by that?" Alex tried to find out.

"Well, yeah, look at them. They're gross. And itchy. And irritating. And all for nothing," she whispered that last part to herself, closing the door and taking another shower, trying for the hives to soothe under the soft sprinkling of the water. She dabbed herself dry, put on her silk robe, and got bed-ready. When she walked out into the bedroom, Alex looked up and watched her.

"So?" he looked at her expectantly, while she kept on fidgeting with the covers and put on her pajamas.

"What?" she snapped back.

"Did you have reason to be worried? Did you find out?" Alex inquired. Jo sighed, keeping her head down, slipping into her cotton pants that barely covered her goods.

"We had reason to be worried, yes," she told him slowly, climbing into the bed. "One of us got fired tonight," she added and looked up in surprise when one of Alex's arms had shot out to her and pulled her closer, making her look him in the eye. "It wasn't me," she shook her head in defeat. She didn't know what to feel anymore. They had all been so sure that _they _were the person to walk the very thin line, they had all developed ridiculous coping mechanisms, she had been so deep into all that crap, now that she knew her spot was safe, she didn't even know what to think. Or do, or say. Especially because she hadn't once thought about the fact that the lay-off of one of her friends would simultaneously save herself. Not once. And now relief mingled with regret and hurt and disbelief.

"I know it wasn't you," Alex told her, shifting a bit too.

"Doesn't make the situation any better," Jo grunted at him. Alex shrugged and wiggled his torso.

"For you, it does. But no, in general it doesn't, you're right," he agreed. "Come here," he pulled her closer, taking her into a hug. Jo eventually let herself fall into him and closed her eyes when she settled in the crook of his neck, trying to breathe rhythmically, to calm down. It was over. No more worrying, no more anything. They could all go back to being their usual selves. She could feel how Alex kissed her temple and forehead.

"Leah," she said after a while, making him nod. "Did you know?" she looked up at him in surprise at his reaction. Alex closed his eyes and shook his head.

"No," he admitted. "But I made an educated guess. You and Steph were always safe. You guys are good. I told you. Warren knows what he's doing. And they love him. I hate to say this, but he has scored brownie points with being besties with Webber and almost anyone else, having been an attending before AND being married to Bailey. If it had been him, he'd have known beforehand. So, it was a gamble between Murphy and Ross. I couldn't be sure because you know… what Ross did," he pointed out quietly, making her nod. "But as you said, they were firing someone because of their skills, not anything else. And Ross is good, so chances were… well, the odds weren't in her favor," he explained himself, making her sigh.

"Why didn't you tell me that before?" she looked at him questioningly.

"Because you were drunk. And annoying. And telling me all kinds of reasons why my opinion isn't really valid on this, leading with the fact that you think I'm a man whore. And I did partially, but you didn't listen, and then you believed I was biased. And lastly, if I had voiced this just like I did a minute ago, would you really have wanted to hear that?" Alex stared her down, almost looking amused. Jo closed her eyes and laughed softly.

"You're probably right," she agreed.

"Usually, yeah," he told her, giving her a smirk.

"Sorry for being such a bitch about it," she repeated from the night before.

"Yeah, yeah, it's fine," he told her again, trying to go back to his reading.

"So," she slowly advanced. "Are _these_….stolen as well?" she looked at him knowingly, pointing at the sheets. Alex looked up in shock but then blushed wildly when Jo started laughing. "Oh my, you are actually embarrassed about this?" she asked. "That makes you a good person, let me tell you," she whispered at him in amusement.

"These are not stolen," Alex replied feebly. Jo chuckled. "How did you know?"

"Shane told me," she smiled at him, making him roll his eyes in irritation. "He also told me how you bribed him into doing it," Jo followed up a little sharper now. Alex was looking down. "You know, it's one thing to do stupid stuff in between attendings but that wasn't a nice thing to do. You put Shane in a horrible position today. And I'm only saying that because I'm scared you're willing to do that to me, too, one day," she tried to make him see. Alex just sighed. "What happened anyway? Why did you come to the hospital to steal a patient and be an asshole towards pretty much anyone involved?" There was a short silence in which Alex tried to shape his words.

"I'm a bit… I…," he took a deep breath, steadying. "I already fell behind at the practice. I didn't realize from the very beginning that there _is _a big difference between the job in the hospital and at the practice," he articulated.

"Which is?"

"At the practice I have to bring patients in… to make money. At the hospital they just… well, they come in on their own. So, I was… swimming for a bit…and then drowning. It was horrible and humiliating and I just thought… I just…I didn't wanna fail during my first month there!" Alex gave her wide eyes and talked frantically. "I didn't wanna admit to myself that maybe I went into all this way over my head. I just thought…there are so many freaking cases at the hospital, Arizona could share at least one with me," he explained sheepishly. Jo looked at him with a pained face.

"Why didn't you just talk to her?" she asked him in disbelief.

"I don't know. I was embarrassed," he justified himself.

"Why didn't you talk to me?" Jo asked a little quieter.

"You had other things on your mind. And everything happened so fast…," he tried. Jo nodded.

"And you were embarrassed? With me?" Jo gazed into Alex's eyes until he nodded. "You're an idiot," she told him, pulling him closer now and hugging him. When they broke, she took the papers Alex was working on and tossed them over on his nightstand, moving downwards to get to a lying position, Alex imitating her. They switched off the lights and lay in a comfortable embrace, Jo on her back while Alex was embracing her from the side, one leg underneath hers, one on top and his nose nuzzling her neck.

"Let's just get over this freaking day, huh?" he mumbled against her skin, making her nod. He ran his thumb across a hive on her neck, making her wince lightly. "Sorry," he whispered. "But it's better already, they'll be gone in no time," he promised her, making her nod. They both had almost fallen asleep, when Jo rustled again.

"Alex?"

"Hm?"

"I know that we haven't been seeing each other for a long, long time and we don't… I mean, I know there's lots of people that have known you a lot longer than I have," she breathed.

"What's your point?"

"I need you to start trusting me," she said, straightforwardly.

"I do trust you," he opened his eyes, looking at her. Jo turned her face to match their eyes and then smiled.

"No, there's a difference. You trusting me is still an active decision you make with everything there is that needs for you to trust me with something. You don't fully trust me," she exposed him.

"So, you want me to blindly trust you?" he smiled at her.

"I don't want you to be naïve, I just… I want you to know that you _can_ trust me. I can take it. And I'll surely be here for you, okay? Even though sometimes I might be drunk and lash out and break out in hives and be a bundle of nerves… unless I'm like that I think I'm a pretty stable person to lean on," she smiled back.

"I'm trying," he said quietly.

"I know," Jo said, shifting a tiny bit closer towards him, running her fingers through his hair before kissing him. When they parted, their eyes burned into each other. "Do you think it'll always be this crazy as long as we keep seeing each other?" she asked him with a light chuckle. Alex joined in.

"Yeah, we did have a pretty crazy year already, huh?" he gave her back, both nodding. "Well, but then again, I can't say that I missed out on all the good crazy," he smirked, squeezing her tighter into his embrace, making her smile against him.

"What do you mean?"

"Well… we do have crazy amounts of amazing sex," he said, making her smile brightly. "And… crazy as both of us are we signed a freaking love contract," he adopted a somewhat sarcastic tone in his voice. "And I'm crazy in love with you," he added after a while, softly. Jo smiled with her eyes closed.

"I wish you'd never stop saying that," she purred against his lips that she had searched for again. They immediately deepened the sentiment, and Alex only broke it once all through the night, and that was to make one thing clear.

"I'm not planning to stop. Ever."

* * *

><p><strong><em>Note: <em>**_For all those who haven't read it, I published my take on post 10x24 as a separate story, called Fear (of the Unknown). Which basically is chapter 22 of this story, but again, I can't post something twice._


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